The "so..." moment

[JonnyD123]

There is a pivotal juncture in every relationship. The moment where you realize I like her and she likes me. The next step is crucial in either moving forward, or moving on.

Recently I had come to these crossroads with a beautiful Hispanic girl, with whom I had spent numerous hot and sweaty nights at her apartment. After about 3-4 months of casually hooking up she dropped the "you only call me for sex" bomb. This is the "so..." Moment.

As much as I enjoyed her company I just couldn't accept her impending terms for exclusivity. I played it off cool enough and we ended up hooking up a few more times, but the dynamic of the relationship changed. The sex was still good, the chemistry was still there, but there was a lack of congruency in our feelings. We have both moved on now, but I will always wonder about her. This is the biggest portion of my game I need to improve on. How do you deal with the "so" moment?

 

[logicallefty]

Typically if I am at that point and things are going reasonably well I will agree to exclusivity (edit: but I will never ever ever bring it up first, she must do that). I almost always have at least 1 in the bull pin or a solid FWB I can go back to if things dont work out. When I agree to the exclusivity thing I make darn sure I do not unframe and I make it clear to the woman that just because we are exclusive doesn't mean I am going to necessarily want to spend more time with her or that anything else will change.. All she gets out of it at first is my agreement not to fvck anyone else but nothing more.. And if she starts to flake and/or misbehave I immediately distance myself and will be the first to end the relationship if I feel that anything changed on her end once we made the agreement. Sense 2006 I have been exclusive with probably, oh let's see(T,R,M,M,S,B,H,J,B,J,H) yeah, 11 women.. I dumped 10 of those, only the first one with the first name starting with T dumped me. That was the point in time in which I learned what to do to never get dumped again.. When things start to slip I cut it and move on without blinking an eye..

 

[Julian]

When she mentioned "you only call me for sex" you failed that to the fullest...

shoulda played it alpha "haha only call you for sex? last time I check you werent complaining when I was banging you into oblivion baby "


then you put your arms around her and look her in the eyes lovingly, give her a deep kiss and reassure you care about her and want to be together and want her to ride with you on your journey blablabla. then proceed to smash more. then you suit up and leave and keep it alpha mode bro. no exclusivity.