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stinging rejection...

speedo_meme

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Man, right when I was feeling good, confident (I'm in a declining relationship) I got a date with a hot chick that cuts my hair. I played it cool DJ style and everything was great. I was pretty aloof in the phone calling and stuff that she got very interested, to the point she was calling me before we even went out.

Well, she's cut my hair twice, and I got her number, waited a week or so to call her, and ask her out for last Saturday. She can't because she's going to a play out of town, but she counter offers for Monday. Cool. Calls me the next day and asks me to come to a car wash her salon is having. I show up at the car wash and she's ecstatic and ask me if I want to go the play with her that night bc she has an extra ticket. I say nah, I've got plans but I'll call you tomorrow about Monday.

Everything's cool until Monday 1 hr. before we go out she cancels, saying that she wants to be honest, she's breaking it off with another guy, blah blah blah, she wants to be upfront and truthful about it. I say cool, I'm kinda doing the same thing. I acted very calm and aloof about it. I even said "it's just dinner, nothing serious". She was even talking about pursuing the "me and her" thing. I say I'll pick her up in an hour. She calls back and cancels, saying it maybe cheating and she doesn't want to do it just yet. she also says, I'll call you in the future and we can get together......

She's 20. is this a loss of interest, or her being honest because she's still with a guy, that could be high school sweethearts or whatever? I don't think I did anything wrong, so I don't think she lost interest in me. I have another haircut in 2 weeks with her, so I guess I'll just go and get the vibe....any suggestions?
 

funkybuddha

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You didn't do anything wrong man. Text book guy meets girl, guy asks girl out etc. She just seems she's not ready and she wasn't ready at all. If she wanted to really go on out w/ you..she wouldn't have cancelled. There might be hope for you yet..but tread lightly for now.
 

GirlCrazy

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Rejection shouldn't sting. You shouldn't take it personally. If the rejection happened due to a mistake on your part, you correct that mistake with the next chick, since usually you only get one good shot with a chick. Some days you win, some days you lose.

As far as how to play it with the hair cutting chick the next time you see her, what's there left to play? You made your move (pat yourself on the back for that), you got shot down, you move on.
 

speedo_meme

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She's a hottie, I don't want to sever the ties.....

Hopefully I'll get another shot, I probably will, seeing as how she did have high interest level, maybe not high enough to get her away from the other guy. But at least I'll see her again....
 

Vince

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Originally posted by speedo_meme
She's a hottie, I don't want to sever the ties.....

Hopefully I'll get another shot, I probably will, seeing as how she did have high interest level, maybe not high enough to get her away from the other guy. But at least I'll see her again....

There has to be some other women that you are interested in right? Well, think of it like an NCAA College Football Ranking system. You had her at 1 and now she has slipped to ...4 or 5. It's time to go after the new #1.
 

speedo_meme

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I guess it does say something good about her integrity. Problem is I had a 1,2 and 3, and they all fell out of the top five quickly and were replaced with....oh yeah, nobody yet. It's been a tough week. But that's life.....
 

speedo_meme

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well she called me back, asked me out for Friday night, which leads me to my other post "date ideas". Should I play tough with her, since she flaked out?
 

Chrispy

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Nah! Don't bust her up for that. She called you back, so have a good time, relax, and let things flow. No need to be immature about 'perceived rejection' :)
And yeah, the dating ideas thread is pretty good...just avoid the dinner/movie combo for the first date!
 

ikkenai

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I think everyone has had a few experiences where a girl doesn't come through on plans, and we start fabricating angry thoughts, feelings of rejection, and hypotheses as to what the hell's going on in her life/head that would have her flip-flopping for no apparent reason.

And I'm sure there are times where this happens, you get all frustrated about a girl, and then the next time you talk she's still showing heavy IOI's and apologizing for not hooking up for the date. Damn, you feel so stupid for getting all worked up, investing all this negative mental energy on a bad situation that never really existed in the first place.

I'm 23, and mostly date 18-20 year olds. They're tempremental. Such is life. If only I could keep my own advice... it's a bad habit that fades as you get more comforatable with your ability to replace a girl.
 

speedo_meme

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jackpot with this girl last night.....got a little stage fright though, i was kinda nervous, but that's life, happens to the best of us.

Gotta keep that IL high now, any suggestions as to how to do this? Besides Doc Love advice, cuz I think he's a little played out.....
 

Royal Elite

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She has you going in circles! She is playing mind games with you and is winning. Look, how many post this girl has had you posting!

She has you acting like a sex and the city episode, Man up take her where ever you want to take her and stop worrying about it!
 

speedo_meme

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Wrong Royal Elite, this post has spanned almost a month. I come on here for simple advice, not to cry about problems. I'm simply trying to iron out past mistakes and not make them again.
 
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