"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Some more C+F Examples

R

RedKnight04

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I put this with the handbook as well but for all those lazy fellas out there to reopen here are some more examples.

What am I doing to let you in on my personal expertice? Well I expect 19.95 plus shipping and handling on my next one so don't get too crazy....

Your at a dinner

Me: I swear the waitress is checking the GUNS out!

(Foods bad)
Me: This food would really be great if they bought a clue.

Me: Do you cook?
Her: Yeah, Sometimes, or Always and some bla bla bla
(Say this no matter what dish she says)
Me: Yea Chef boyardee is pretty good.

REMEMBER!
Don't come off as too UNSTABLE and RUDE! Throw the C+F when your intuition feels right and then communicate normally. Then pop out again.

Your Walking

Me: What are you doing?

Her: HUH!?

Me: Yeah, you can't do that!

Her: Do WHAT!?

Me: Walk like that and be with MEEEE.

(Point to yourself with both hands but with your thumbs backwards not with your pointer)

You have to walk like this if you want to be with me. (Do your best impersination of a ****y ass walk - throw your chest out way to overly ahead - and walk with a funny grace)

Your at the Beach

Her: Nice day huh honey?

Me: Honey? Since when do you get that honor? (Look up at the sky and do a portrait pose!)

Me: Yes it is, it just would be more pleasent with more of my girls with me.

Her: So you gotta hear about this thing my ex did!
Me: Oh hold on one sec, I gotta find someone who gives a damn. (While you say the second part act like your looking around for someone) HAHA Funny stuff!

Your at Home watching a Flik

Her: What a great movie!

(I put that response by her to show you where your intuition has to be - IF she is in a good mood, let her flow and than add that your having fun too)

DON'T BUST HER BALLS WHEN SHE SAYS SHE IS HAVING A GREAT TIME OR ENJOYING WHATEVER THE HELL YOUR DOING!!!

Me: Yeah, its good.

This may seem AFC but remember that your C+F has to RETREAT atleast some of the time. You have to be unpredictable. IF you keep busting and busting and busting shes not going to think you care AT ALL!

Do it but use it as a "I don't care what happens" throw in to the situation.

Hard to understand? It was for me.

Your at the Mall

Me: OH hey check that shirt out, that would be perfect for you! (Point to the ugliest shirt)

You following?

And just as an ending note. I want to give my salooot to all the others before me that invented the game or personified it.

I am not taking away from that...SO PLEASE UNDERSTAND!

Thanks, And I hopes you enjoy!
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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S

Smileyz

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hehhe

hahaha you ****y son of a gun..

i like the boyfriend..part.

ill look for someone who gives a damn...its kinda hard to use it in my language though..but still "HAHA" funny:)
 
J

JB101

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C&F is about exaggerating a situation. It ALWAYS stretches the truth. And there's always the element of making you look better or making her look worst. For example:

Me: You go to USC?

Her: Yeah....you've heard of it?

Me: hmmmm....maybe....not sure...some community college or something.

Her: Haha, yeah something like that.

Me: Why are you going to a CC, arent you a smart girl?

Me: You know I only date smart and attractive girls.

Her: Well, I'm trying my best.

Me: Keep studying, no slacking off ok.

Her: Haha, ok.

C&F is designed to get girls emotions stirred up. If you take a situation and just talk normally, of course she's use to that. It doesn't do anything for her. But C&F suprises her. It shows playfulness.
 
R

RedKnight04

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Thanks, but fellas your telling me something I allready know!
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

M

Microphone Fiend

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Nice examples.

I also want to add that being funny means turning even the most mundane things into a joke. Keeping up to date with the media helps a hell of a lot. Jokes that everyone can get are the best ones because no-one feels left out. A well timed "How you doin!" a la Joey Tribbiane from Friends gets a laugh, as does "hey where's the cream filling" or looking at a fat person and asking your friend, "Am I the only one afraid of what that guy would do for a klondike bar?"


Being spotaneous always helps too, you'll be suprised at the thing you'd do when you are on top of your game

You: Hey HB8 here comes my friend Ryan. Lol, he's soooooo funny, we got this joke going where we act like we don't know each other. He got a makeover but I know that's him. (walk up to a complete stranger) HEY RYAN!! How's it going? Long time no see eh?
Stranger:(Something along the lines of "I don't know you")
You: Haha Ryan man, I already told her the joke man give it up, lol. etc etc
Stranger: (gets frustrated and walks away)
You: RYAN WHERE YOU GOING? dON'T WALK AWAY LIKE YOU DON'T KNOW ME BUDDY!
You:....... uh maybe that wasn't Ryan?
Girl: lol OMG


Never apologize for a joke unless you like diss a dead relative by a mistake or something. being C&F means caring about people's emotions, but not their perception of you.


Making jokes that you shouldn't be making is a touchy subject but most of the time it is worth the reward (see: Family Guy) Things like after describing a hard days work, start singing "swing low sweet chariot" and other slave labour songs for a laugh.


The key part to C&F I think is just being the quickest. Jokes lose their effectiveness with each passing second so blurt out that funny thought that brings a smile to your face before the opportunity passes you by.

It's all a state of mind. If you don't get a laugh and you hide your head in shame of not getting a laugh, it cancels out feeling like you failed or whatever. Just don't let it faze you
 
I

Imbrondir

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C&F is modelled after naturals using it. I believe learning to recognise guys or even girls using it, is very helpfull to learn this stuff as well. Who knows, you may even find some good stuf you can steal ;). I've found C&F using more non-verbal and push pull'ish stuff give the best reaction.

A girls gets introduced to you from a guy/girl you know:
"Hey... is this the girl you talked about who was ..... kinda.... [make gestures sayin she's a weirdo]

Her: bumps into something:
Look at her in a disapproving tone, like to a child... and go... tsk tsk tsk....

<from a james bond movie>
Her:Hi, may I help you (or something):
You: Hmmm... I'm tempted to take the offer [sweep eyes over her body in a second, with a ****y look].... but I think i'll rather look around first ;)

Here's a few more composed by feminator on ASF:
http://www.fastseduction.com/cgi-bin/search.cgi?action=retrieve&grp=5&mn=1065603242105567

A key note if you're gonna steal lines btw imho, is not useing them for others entertainment... but for your own... like you saw something SO COOL, that you're just dying to see the weird reactions :).
 
R

RedKnight04

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Sarcasm Tips

You know one thing that really helps me in convo skills is sarcasm. It even makes me come up with $hit on the fly easier.

I just think of 20 arrogant statements in a regular guy perspective.

For instance:

"This teacher sucks."

"This food really sucks."

"This post sucks."

"Your actions are annoying me."

and so on.

Just things that happen in situations every day and then I write FUNNY SARCASM to them.

Sarcasm to me is saying your feeling at the current moment in a different way.

Like:

"Wow, instead of falling asleep in bed - I guess I should bring a pillow here."

"This food is making me regret not becoming a chef."

"My post is so energizing, I'm sure it is making you guys gringe with information."

"Acting like a little kid really helps you in every situation huh?"
 
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