Some help or advice would be greatly appreciated.

[C-quenced]

Hey everyone. I have been studying the dj bible and making an effort to improve myself. So far everything is going fine but damn this dj stuff sure is hard as hell. Old habits kick in so easily and it's probably the most annoying part of the transition. This is like my third week here so far and my very first post. I have some very "stupid" questions to ask if anyone doesn't mind.

First of all there is this one very pretty girl that demonstrates interest to me. This girl is not aggressive like many other women I've been speaking to and she is very feminine. She has a very warm personality and somehow puts me at ease when I try to talk to her. She is also very laid back and quiet. If I'm not wrong she was brought up in a good natured family. I see her maybe about once or twice a week and I get to speak to her for a good amount of time (duration is neither long nor short.) and I always keep everything light and fun and so does she. I want to know if it is okay if I just ask her if she is doing anything sometime around the week and then invite her to hang out, get the phone number etc. I just hope that isn't being too aggressive or makes me look desperate. I wanted to do just that but I did not because I didn't want to do the wrong things. Do you guys have any suggestions as to how I can handle this?

And another thing... when a girl gives you signals and makes it obvious does she want you to talk to her and then maybe ask her out? I apologize in advanced for being so naive as I have little expirience with women. Thanks so much for the help for those who decide to reply

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

You should proceed with caution, in this situation.

It's hard for us to tell wether or not this girl is interested or is just plain friendly. How long have you too been talking? If it's been more than a couple of weeks, forget it. You're in the friend zone and while she may be interested, you're risking making things really awkward if she just considers you a friend.

You need to keep applying the DJ bible stuff that you're learning and just use this chick for practice in being a good conversationalist, being ****y and funny, busting on her and just getting your external dialog to match your internal one.
Don't look to date/pickup until you've got a good grasp of the basics and have learned to apply them to your personality type.

I say just don't do it, right now. Something in your post tells me you've got a bit of the love blinders up and might be seeing her in your own light, and not for who she truely is, and if this is the case, then absolutely do not ask her out.

And when you do get the green light from a girl you should just grab her phone number/ask her out and then take it from there.

The only problem with younger guys, and people who haven't yet learned the right mindset is that they have problems recognizing interest and often mistake it for ordinary friendliness.

 

[ARrocket]

Well, in your situation, I would ask her to do a specific thing with you....you know, already have to day and activity in mind. If she seems interested in that, get the number.

As for your second question, it's one that can't really be answered...there are so many factors involved, it's different in each situation.

 

[C-quenced]

You should proceed with caution, in this situation.

It's hard for us to tell wether or not this girl is interested or is just plain friendly. How long have you too been talking? If it's been more than a couple of weeks, forget it. You're in the friend zone and while she may be interested, you're risking making things really awkward if she just considers you a friend.

You need to keep applying the DJ bible stuff that you're learning and just use this chick for practice in being a good conversationalist, being ****y and funny, busting on her and just getting your external dialog to match your internal one.
Don't look to date/pickup until you've got a good grasp of the basics and have learned to apply them to your personality type.

I say just don't do it, right now. Something in your post tells me you've got a bit of the love blinders up and might be seeing her in your own light, and not for who she truely is, and if this is the case, then absolutely do not ask her out.

And when you do get the green light from a girl you should just grab her phone number/ask her out and then take it from there.

The only problem with younger guys, and people who haven't yet learned the right mindset is that they have problems recognizing interest and often mistake it for ordinary friendliness.

Thanks for the replies you guys. I've met her about 2 weeks ago through some friends from college. 1 of them being female with very high interest in me. The very first day I met this girl she was very distant and closed. I assumed she was taken and didn't even bother to hit on her. Several days after I met her again and I began to read her actions and her body language and it was entirely different. I would catch her positioning herself to face me as if she wanted to talk and I would act as if I haven't noticed it. I would catch her staring at me from time to time and she would just smile and look down, I would say or do stupid and clumsy things and she finds it rather amusing. There are also times when she's trying to tell me something and when she leans towards me our faces are unusually close. If she's trying to hand me something she does it in a playful way and makes sure our hands touch. She doesn't act this way around other men from my observations. If it's been a week that I haven't seen her facial expression changes from neutral to slightly happy. Those are some signs that I have been able to pick up on.

You've just mentioned that I may have a little bit of the "love blinders" going on and I'm glad you did. I don't want to percieve her to be something she isn't nor would I want her to make herself seem like something she isn't. Isn't that more like a scam or a fraud? I too was thinking that but this girl does tend to be unusually nice and something about her definitely stands out. It's very intriguing. This is why I would like to get to know her better but I don't know how to authentically demonstrate that to her. I'm not making her my only option and I'm still persuing other women just in case something goes wrong with one and then I wouldn't have to stress over it and can move on with my life.

The thing is that I don't know the perfect timing when getting her # and asking her out. I don't know if she feels safe giving it to me and I don't want to come off like the other guys in her life who throw themselves at her.

 

[C-quenced]

I'm sorry but allow me to make myself more clearer in my last two sentences. I know about waiting several days after getting the phone number to call. What I mean to say by "perfect timing" is when I make the move from telling her that I would be doing "x" at this particular time during the week and that she is more than welcome to join, and from there on getting the number.