Many times have I heard men complain that women only like jerks. Well, it simply isn't true.
Usually when men say "women don't like nice guys", what they are really saying is "women don't like me". Well, with an attitute like that, they're half right.
Granted, there are women who date convicts or men who beat them, and there are women who will scream at you when you give up a seat for her on a crowded train (avoid these women at all costs!!) but that is the exception rather than a rule.
Here's what women DO like: genuinely good men.
Here's what women DON'T like: desperate men, doormats, insecure men
When guys refer to "nice" guys it's actually pretty misleading. "Nice guys" generally aren't any nicer than "jerks". The only difference is that the "jerk" got the girl and the "nice" guy didn't.
The reasons for this could be numerous. Maybe you came on too strong, maybe she likes men with facial hair, maybe you just aren't her type (hey, it happens) or maybe you reek of desperation. Whatever the reason, chances are it's not because you were too nice.
So why are the ones who go home alone called "nice" guys? Simple. When a guy comes onto a girl he does everything in his power to be nice, and if she doesn't take to it for whatever reason his only explanation is that he was too nice. People love to rationalize.
So now a guy who is already feeling bitter and rejected makes a concerted effort to be less nice thinks he's going to get a girl? Yeah, right.
Another reason is that guys tend to shower their affection on girls in order to get the girls to like them. As far as I can tell, this has NEVER worked for ANYBODY. Either she likes you or she doesn't, and your over-the-top efforts will at best elicit a mental "ewwww" (at worst she'll get a restraining order). Save your efforts for your girlfriend when you get one.
Bottom line is this: would you want to date a bitter, desperate person who's trying to be a jerk? Probably not. Instead, focus on your technique and what you are doing wrong. Hint: it's not that you were too polite.
Usually when men say "women don't like nice guys", what they are really saying is "women don't like me". Well, with an attitute like that, they're half right.
Granted, there are women who date convicts or men who beat them, and there are women who will scream at you when you give up a seat for her on a crowded train (avoid these women at all costs!!) but that is the exception rather than a rule.
Here's what women DO like: genuinely good men.
Here's what women DON'T like: desperate men, doormats, insecure men
When guys refer to "nice" guys it's actually pretty misleading. "Nice guys" generally aren't any nicer than "jerks". The only difference is that the "jerk" got the girl and the "nice" guy didn't.
The reasons for this could be numerous. Maybe you came on too strong, maybe she likes men with facial hair, maybe you just aren't her type (hey, it happens) or maybe you reek of desperation. Whatever the reason, chances are it's not because you were too nice.
So why are the ones who go home alone called "nice" guys? Simple. When a guy comes onto a girl he does everything in his power to be nice, and if she doesn't take to it for whatever reason his only explanation is that he was too nice. People love to rationalize.
So now a guy who is already feeling bitter and rejected makes a concerted effort to be less nice thinks he's going to get a girl? Yeah, right.
Another reason is that guys tend to shower their affection on girls in order to get the girls to like them. As far as I can tell, this has NEVER worked for ANYBODY. Either she likes you or she doesn't, and your over-the-top efforts will at best elicit a mental "ewwww" (at worst she'll get a restraining order). Save your efforts for your girlfriend when you get one.
Bottom line is this: would you want to date a bitter, desperate person who's trying to be a jerk? Probably not. Instead, focus on your technique and what you are doing wrong. Hint: it's not that you were too polite.
