"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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So here's a question I've been wanting to ask - how do you deal with parties?

Brighty

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Even though I think a lot of the "popular" kids at my school are complete douchebag tools, there's like two girls there that hang out with that crowd that I want to hook up with. I mean, how do you guys handle parties? Do you just show up there, even if they don't invite you, in an attempt to get your girl? If you do, how do you deal with comments like "What are you doing here?" and "YOUR here?" (these haven't been said to me, I'm just preparing for the worst case scenario).


Just curious
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Stacks Of Terror

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It depends on the size. If its one of those big ass parties then jsut go. But if its less than 20 people I would say no.
 

SinJester

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I don't know about you Americans but here where I live it's a pretty small town. So basically anyone can go to any party and get away with it because they want numbers. I haven't been invited to a single party I've been to. However if its [enter really cool guy here]'s party and he doesn't like you best not to show up. However if there are lots of people you could probably get away with it, especially if you go a bit later when they are drunk.

Best thing to do is be friendly to everyone. Even if you don't like them talk to them and be nice to them. Even if you are just on talking term you will get into the party. Now, when you are actually at the party do the same. You might want to remain inconspicuous but you will fit in better talking to EVERYONE you know. If there are some people you don't introduce yourself. You will probably end up making some new friends thisn way.

Then go onto gaming your girls ;)

"What are you doing here?"
"Just having a good time, great party man! :D"
OR
"Someone told me your having a sweet party, and I thought if anyone was going to pull that off it would be you man, nice work! :D"
A little flattery never hurts :p


Hope that helps, obvioulsy your situations are a little different over there.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

Read more...

I.A.F.Y.B.

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Brighty said:
Even though I think a lot of the "popular" kids at my school are complete douchebag tools, there's like two girls there that hang out with that crowd that I want to hook up with. I mean, how do you guys handle parties? Do you just show up there, even if they don't invite you, in an attempt to get your girl? If you do, how do you deal with comments like "What are you doing here?" and "YOUR here?" (these haven't been said to me, I'm just preparing for the worst case scenario).


Just curious
Whenever I go to a party I'm not invited to. I drink the their booze, smoke their weed, eat their food and take their girls. If you get caught just leave.

But, on a serious note... Like other people said. Say you're just here for the party and the b!tches. Practice your socializing and meet new people.
 

Supremo

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You could just work on getting more popular at school, and in turn, get invited to parties.

That way you don't gotta worry about getting questioned.

Dawg, just start talking to the popular/party kids. Be their friend. Nothings worse than going to a party and seeing sketchy kids there. DON'T BE THAT SKETCHY KID!
 

mastacheef

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yes if its a HUGE party and no one will notice you then of course go, but if its smaller try to go with a friend or ask one of the kids that are going what they are doing this weekend and if they ask you just something in or along the lines of you are wanting to party but can't find one in hopes of him inviting you.. and if you show up with him just tell the truth if someone asks "I showed up with billy" or you could just throw your own.. good luck man!
 

zubs

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Dude, first off, get to know these "douchebag tools". Unless your HS is something out of a teen movie, then they are probably pretty nice guys. I used to think the same thing about these "popular kids" until i got to know them, when i realized that i was creating those labels for them (and adding douchebag in front of the labels).

But this party question is a good one. The simple answer is be fun to be around, and be patient. The lunchroom is the perfect place to do this. I became "popular" by making the occasional joke and by being friendly to all people.

Then just ask them (guys or chicks), "hey whats your number, we should chill this weekend" when it feels right, or "so what are you up to this weekend" and they will usually tell you; i might go to x's party....

As long as you are cool with x, you are in.
 

The Kidd

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^yes i do agree you should socialise with them but the question is 'are YOU cool?'

think about it, if you were some really popular guy and some uncool kid comes up to you trying to talk to you and be your new best friend, you'd either ignore him or tell him to get lost

you have think to yourself, "if i were them, would i want to talk to me?"
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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LostAndConfused

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Crashing parties is pretty rough because you need to be accepted for it to really pull off smoothly, and it really isn't that hard. Just go out and meet new people, like supremo and zubs and others have said.

But hey man, this is important.....you are probably approaching parties (even ones you are allowed to go to) with a totally wrong mindset. It's never good to go in saying "Oh this is the worst thing that could happen, let me prepare myself..."

Doing something like that is an easy "out." You don't want to get disappointed, so you already assume the worst. Take it from me, if you do that, you'll just end up avoiding everyone at the party and be all by yourself, because you internalized this worst case scenario and you are trying to avoid it.

So the first thing you do, before any other thought process, is get rid of a negative mentality. In science, and in life, likes attract. Negative thoughts attract negative situations.

Apply that to your life OUTSIDE the party too. Like as zubs said, try the lunchroom. You probably assume the worst and internally feel "correct" when the worst does happen. Its really hard for a group of people, in the lunchroom, to say something mean to a guy with a smile on his face.
 
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