Simple question about setting a date

[Shivastorm_88]

Let's say today I call a girl to set up a date for Monday, and she says most probably but to call her back Sunday to confirm if she can or not, what should I do in this situation? Should I brush it off and do call her back on Sunday, or say something like (not as bluntly that;s for sure hahah): "I need a confirmation now because if not I'll probably end doing something else, so if you can't confirm now I'll call you back Sunday if I have nothing to do" (and not call back obviously)

 

[horaholic]

Very high flake potential here. I would bypass sunday, and call her on Monday before your date, but expect her to flake.

Another option, so you dont jump through her hoop, is to tell her that she should call YOU if something comes up. Like this "Well, Im gonna be busy on sunday, so why dont you call ME, if you can't make it for some reason, and if I dont hear from you, I'll assume we're good to go."

That approach will put YOU in charge of the frame.

 

[ThatMysteriousGuy]

Let's say today I call a girl to set up a date for Monday, and she says most probably but to call her back Sunday to confirm if she can or not, what should I do in this situation? Should I brush it off and do call her back on Sunday, or say something like (not as bluntly that;s for sure hahah): "I need a confirmation now because if not I'll probably end doing something else, so if you can't confirm now I'll call you back Sunday if I have nothing to do" (and not call back obviously)

If she said "probably" but to call her back Sunday to confirm I would call back and say "something came up for Monday and I'll be busy". Do not explain in any way what came up, that's making excuses, you're just doing "stuff". Then, reschedule for the following Monday (not FRI/SAT/SUN) and if she again pulls the "i don't know for sure, call and confirm" like you're someone making an appointment to see a superior, then just say "that doesn't work for me/this isn't going to work" in a casual "no biggie" manner and tell her you need to get going and off the phone.

This will get her more interested. She tried to take complete power and see you at her own convenience if she has nothing better to do. Now, it's backfired and YOU have something else to do. She WILL flake on you if you don't get her chasing you and expected to honor her commitments.

If you don't do this and instead give her permission to put you on her permanent backup list, that's all you'll ever be, a backup when she's bored or has nothing better to do and you won't be able to reverse it.

 

[Shivastorm_88]

If she said "probably" but to call her back Sunday to confirm I would call back and say "something came up for Monday and I'll be busy". Do not explain in any way what came up, that's making excuses, you're just doing "stuff". Then, reschedule for the following Monday (not FRI/SAT/SUN) and if she again pulls the "i don't know for sure, call and confirm" like you're someone making an appointment to see a superior, then just say "that doesn't work for me/this isn't going to work" in a casual "no biggie" manner and tell her you need to get going and off the phone.

This will get her more interested. She tried to take complete power and see you at her own convenience if she has nothing better to do. Now, it's backfired and YOU have something else to do. She WILL flake on you if you don't get her chasing you and expected to honor her commitments.

If you don't do this and instead give her permission to put you on her permanent backup list, that's all you'll ever be, a backup when she's bored or has nothing better to do and you won't be able to reverse it.

thanks that's exactly the kind of answer I was looking for, sounds pretty good, thanks for the advice

 

[Shivastorm_88]

heh the AFC in me is scared to this this, I feel uneasy to step up and take charge instead of leaving the control into someone else's hand. Fear of the unknown...

But I will definitely conquer this fear, it's definitely the best approach, far better than leaving control in her hands

 

[Bobby Rio]

Shivastorm

they gave you great advice... its funny because the more you're willing to walk away and lose a girl... the more they stick around.

 

[tafakna]

"I need a confirmation now because if not I'll probably end doing something else, so if you can't confirm now I'll call you back Sunday if I have nothing to do" (and not call back obviously)

MysteriousGuy gave a great advice here, so no need to repeat it.

But don't EVER use something like that above. You start demanding a confirmation and then move on to say that you might do something else. It sounds as AFC as it can get.

You're a man, be decisive. I go out 4-5 times a week, and even then MON are a dead day. So follow the advice given if you expect to have ANY chance, because right now she doesn't sound at all interested.

Break the date as said, and absolutely don't try to make this date work. If you call and start fishing for a feedback if the date is on or not, you'll be in a much much worse situation.

I wouldn't try to reschedule it now either. Just say 'sorry something came up and I will not be able to make this Monday'. Don't explain what it is, and don't reschedule it yet.

Leave her wondering for a few days, and then try to set up a new date.

Good luck.

 

[jdollarthegreat]

Real talk, I don't know guys. All the information that was given to him was good I'd agree but I feel his next move is determined but what his ultimate goal is wit said chick. Like I feel he should move a certain way if he's looking to possibly date this chick longterm and a whole other way if he just wanna pluck her or suttin know wat im saying.

 

[Shivastorm_88]

bah what happened is I called yesterday night no answer so I left a message, she just called me back 10 mins ago so I said I have an unexpected event that we gonna have to reschedule, so I said I'll give her a call during the weekend

 

[ThatMysteriousGuy]

bah what happened is I called yesterday night no answer so I left a message, she just called me back 10 mins ago so I said I have an unexpected event that we gonna have to reschedule, so I said I'll give her a call during the weekend

Oops and oops.

Don't leave answering messages when you first know a girl. You hand her power she really doesn't want from a man, that's why she's still looking.

You committed to calling to see when she'd be free on the weekend. You handed her power she really doesn't want from a man, that's why she's still looking.

This isn't about a game, or gaming women, it's about a general principal regarding what women want and are attracted to.