"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Simple analogy that got me past fear and anxiety.

skEwb

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I started treating hitting on girls like a game of basketball. I thought about how many players go out there and shoot the ball, do they always make it? The answer is no. Do they keep taking more shots and not stop at the sight of missing one? The answer is yes.

So the way I see it is if you don't hit the court and start shooting to score, you'll never score. You may miss a lot, but you're gaining more and more experience so you develop that smooth shot that in the future will hit more than miss.

Simple stats:
No shooting = 0%
Taking a shot = 50%

Expert players and veterans of the game will experience a higher shooting percentage ;)

You may ask: "How does this do any good with the actual approach anxiety"

The answer is easy, you want to win, you want to score. Treat her like an opponent and make her think you're strong and different. Don't buckle under pressure. Take those shots fellas, who cares if you miss? You're getting better with each shot.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Warrior74

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The greatest basketball player of all time said it best:

Sports
Always turn a negative situation into a positive situation.

Leadership
I have missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I have lost almost 300 games. On 26 occasions I have been entrusted to take the game winning shot... and missed. And I have failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.

Achievements
I realized that if I was going to achieve anything in life I had to be aggressive. I had to get out there and go for it... I know fear is an obstacle for some people, but it's an illusion to me.

Overcoming Failure
If it turns out that my best wasn't good enough, at least I won't look back and say that I was afraid to try; failure makes me work even harder.

Determination
Obstacles don't have to stop you. If you run into a wall, don't turn around and give up. Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it.

Confidence
You have to expect things of yourself before you can do them.


- Micheal Jordan
Good post!
 

skEwb

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Warrior74 said:
Good post!
Perfect examples from MJ, thanks for adding that. Just wondering if it's helped out anyone else. Anyone try it out?
 

skEwb

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Bluesteak said:
Skewb in your sig do you mean the 310 as in SoCal?
Yes 310 SoCal :rockon:
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Bluesteak

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Yea right on man, good to know there's some dj's around here. Im reppin 310 also
 

TheWayOfAllFlesh

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I know this stuff can help you alleviate the fear as it has done for me but I still always get scared to make an initial approach
 

IKO69

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Fear and anxiety when dealing with women...honestly, I think the only silver bullet is to just do it. That's really all you can do...no amount of thinking or posturing is going to do you any good. You have to just bite the bullet and go for it. With each attempt it should get better than the last.

Nice tip though
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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