"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Should I tell her I'm gonna be with another girl?

The_Reaper

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I'm in a not-exactly-official relationship with a girl, who I wont see for 3 months because I'm living abroad. I admit I have very strong feelings for her - a kind of wavering oneitus that goes from severe to occasional bland indifference. I would like to be exclusive with her eventually, when i see her again.
Where I am now (in a different country from her for a few months), I met a girl who i'm into, and she's into me, so.... we're going to be having sex soon, but after the three months we will go our separate ways (according to my plan anyway...)

I have reasonable suspicion that my not-official GF, who says that she loves me ("a bit too much" she said), was with someone else in college. She just started her first year of college, sex is practically inevitable, I think? There's something so devious behind her facade of innocence, it really is perplexing and maddening. I think she is the type of person who has the potential to cheat and keep it secret, with little inner turmoil. Maybe I'm wrong, but that's what my instincts tell me.

Someone left a message on her my-space thing, saying something like "so, greg...mmmmm", but my GF deleted it. so obviously she didnt want me seeing it.

Should i just tell her i'm seeing someone, or should i say nothing? Part of me wants to show her that, look: you can't play me and play the silent lies game, i don't want her thinking that i'm over here wanking to her every night while she's having a sneaky fling.

I hope my post is coherent enough.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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flexion_

Master Don Juan
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You plan on parting ways. No sense creating drama.... have fun with your last bits of time together and then just move on. No need to say anything to her. Ironically taking this approach will let her know you are seeing someone else - she will sense it.
 

frivolousz21

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The_Reaper said:
I'm in a not-exactly-official relationship with a girl, who I wont see for 3 months because I'm living abroad. I admit I have very strong feelings for her - a kind of wavering oneitus that goes from severe to occasional bland indifference. I would like to be exclusive with her eventually, when i see her again.
Where I am now (in a different country from her for a few months), I met a girl who i'm into, and she's into me, so.... we're going to be having sex soon, but after the three months we will go our separate ways (according to my plan anyway...)

I have reasonable suspicion that my not-official GF, who says that she loves me ("a bit too much" she said), was with someone else in college. She just started her first year of college, sex is practically inevitable, I think? There's something so devious behind her facade of innocence, it really is perplexing and maddening. I think she is the type of person who has the potential to cheat and keep it secret, with little inner turmoil. Maybe I'm wrong, but that's what my instincts tell me.

Someone left a message on her my-space thing, saying something like "so, greg...mmmmm", but my GF deleted it. so obviously she didnt want me seeing it.

Should i just tell her i'm seeing someone, or should i say nothing? Part of me wants to show her that, look: you can't play me and play the silent lies game, i don't want her thinking that i'm over here wanking to her every night while she's having a sneaky fling.

I hope my post is coherent enough.
you dont have to tell her anything.
 

DJDamage

Master Don Juan
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She is not your gf so you tell her sh1t. You don't owe her and you shouldn't open your big mouth to girls about other girls. Keep your ego in check and pimp on the low.

Remember that alot of things can happen between now and 3 months. You can come back and meet a different girl with different plans and discover that you are not part of them.

Beside's you are 20 years old and have no business in being an LTR. Go fvck this other chick and have your fun and when you come back home then assess where you really stand with this girl.

It will be ashamed to be absent for sex for 3 months only to come back home and find out you did it all for nothing.
 

The_Reaper

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DJDamage said:
She is not your gf so you tell her sh1t. You don't owe her and you shouldn't open your big mouth to girls about other girls. Keep your ego in check and pimp on the low.

Remember that alot of things can happen between now and 3 months. You can come back and meet a different girl with different plans and discover that you are not part of them.

Beside's you are 20 years old and have no business in being an LTR. Go fvck this other chick and have your fun and when you come back home then assess where you really stand with this girl.

It will be ashamed to be absent for sex for 3 months only to come back home and find out you did it all for nothing.

Brilliant response, thanks man.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

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