Should I pay

[Francisco d'Anconia]

I agree. The first thing that popped in my head was, why go on first/second dates to places where the whole paying issue comes up?

Because it's cliche and guy's have a tendency to prove their worth by displaying their ability to "take care of" a woman.

I view expensive meals as an LTR type of thing. Some of my best first few dates with women were mini golf (of course you have to show her proper form ) or some other fun activity, and drive thru. If there's ever a time to be rational about these things in a relationship, it's now. Precedents are being set. Set the precedent of a man who is so awesome, that fast food eaten with you is a 5 star meal.

:yes: So very true. So many guys aren't rational about these things, they are way too focused on impressing a woman by external means.

Francisco is right, if you are treating her to an expensive meal on the second date, it makes you look like you think she is obligated to do something (put out.) Also, it makes it look like you have nothing else to offer except being able to treat her to expensive meals. Here's a hint, let your personality take the meal's place .

Good stuff!

 

[Gangster Of Love]

Who suggested/decided on this type of date? If YOU decided to go to a FANCY restaurant, then you pay for the whole thing. If she offers, then that's ok, but don't go in expecting her to, and don't make too much out of it if she doesn't offer. It was you who agreed to this.

That being said, since you know she's attracted to you, you'd be better off having HER cook for you. That will do so much and accomplish so many things at so many different levels. Going to dinner will just create the type of "interview" style type of date, just increasing your chances of her coming up with reasons to play games.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

...That being said, since you know she's attracted to you, you'd be better off having HER cook for you. That will do so much and accomplish so many things at so many different levels. Going to dinner will just create the type of "interview" style type of date, just increasing your chances of her coming up with reasons to play games.

I was going to suggest this, you are absolutely right. Typically we'd trade off hosting dinner and "hanging out " in each other's respective spaces to get to know one another before we actually start going out for food and entertainment.