"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Should I break it off?

HollisterStud69

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I met this Girl 7 months ago through a friend. I liked her a lot and decided to date her. Well, two months came around and summer ended. It was time for me to get back to school, and her to leave for school. She left for OSU, and I could not stop thinking about her. So we decided to take it to the next level, and consider each other girlfriend/boyfriend. I was really happy with this decision, but since she left for school she stopped excersing. She was a gymnstics teacher, and this excercise kept her figure REALLY NICELY. Now, she has definately gained her "freshmen 15+." This girl is great, and I never thought I would be this shallow, but anytime she comes to visit me I am not attracted to thise new chubby figure. This is really hurting our relationship, and I can not just come out and tell her. Please help!!! What would you guys do in this situation??
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Grey Fox

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Of course you can't come out and directly say your woman is fat, without getting into a major fight. So what you do is get her to start thinking about it. Next time she calls you up be like, "lemme call you back, i'm finishing up my workout." When you eat together just get a salad or something like that. If its real bad ask her if she wants to go on a little couple's walk like every other day when you are together...like a mile or so. Tell her you cant wait to see her in a little bikini when summer time rolls round. She should start to think about all this and realize maybe hitting the gym isn't a bad idea, if she does and starts to look a little better each time you see her, be really encouraging. If she pulls the "Am I fat?" question just ask her how she feels about it. Now I say all this assuming that you want to keep her and that you want away that aviods pissing matches and *****ing sessions that would disrupt your peace.

-Grey Fox
 

LuvMyArmyMan

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wow, you are very shallow. So what if she's a little chubby? I bet she found things wrong with your body that she didnt like and did she b1tch and complain? And how is it ruining your "relationship"?

If you're really THAT concerned, ask her to go to the gym with you. Its not life or death here.
 

Dukester

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break it off over the fresh 15 ! are you fvcking stupid??

dude, she gained a lil weight, cut her a break. i'm sure you dont have the perfect body either. by the time summertime rolls around again i bet you $100 she will look good again.

it's very very common for girls to slack off their looks/figure/whatever during the fall/winter months. i.e. they eat a lot, eat fatty foods, drink pop n sh!t like that.

if you wanna break up w/ her over a few xtra lbs, you gotta go to a brain doctor, cuz u r fvcked up.

if it's seriosly that bad, do what the other guy said, and leave her hints about the gym and working out...
 

squirrels

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Originally posted by Dukester
it's very very common for girls to slack off their looks/figure/whatever during the fall/winter months. i.e. they eat a lot, eat fatty foods, drink pop n sh!t like that.

if you wanna break up w/ her over a few xtra lbs, you gotta go to a brain doctor, cuz u r fvcked up.
Depends on

1) How many pounds.

2) Whether she is COMFORTABLE with the weight or she wants to work it off.

Does she ever drop hints about it? Like comments in passing that she's been eating bad or has a big ass, almost like she wants you to say something one way or the other? That's when you tell her, "ahh, no big deal, a few weeks in the gym and that'll all cut right off." You can't outright TELL her "you need to lose weight," but you can encourage her own desire to lose it. At the same time, you don't want to give her that "I like you just the way you are" crap. Because the truth is you like her, but you DON'T like her current shape.

I like some of GF's ideas.

But if she's comfortable with the weight and has no desire to lose it, that bugs me right there. Fitness is a big part of my life and I don't know if I could get with a girl who didn't respect her body at all. I mean, I put on weight at times too, esp around the holidays. But I DO care about it.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Dukester

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good tips squirrels.
i'm not saying that gaining like 20 lbs is fine. cuz something like that is noticible. hell even 10 is

i lift 3 x a week, and i used to wrestle in high school, so i care about my body. if a chick doesnt respect her body,a nd just lets herself get fat, and not care about it, then that is a prob.

but again. a lot of girls do slack off during the winter months, then fix themselves up for summer. (but they dont put on a lot of lbs, or look like **** either)

hell, what is thanksgiving, the biggest fat food fest! during the holiday's i put on weight, but i work it off regularly

god knows i agree w/ ya
 

HollisterStud69

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See that is the thing. She is suppose to be a little asian girl. She is only about 4'9 with a very small gymnist/cheerleader frame. 15 lbs on her looks like 30-40 lbs on the average girl. I am just worried that she doesnt know how to eat right. Her adopted parents are both heavy, and raised her on fast food. When we go out to eat I have tried ordering littlier amounts then her, and not even finishing them. But, I still have never heard a comment on her drastic weight change.

To the guys that say I am a ****. I work out, and do not expect for my girlfriend to do the same, but I am sorry that I can not date a fat girl. I do expect for my girl to worry about her body by eating healthy. I know it sounds shallow, but I know most of the guys on here like their girl to be attractive when they go out.

She drives an 1 n' 1/2 every friday to visit me for the weekend. I will look into buying her a pass into my gym for christmas. Maybe that will help.

Thanks for the advice guys. Keep em coming.
 

HollisterStud69

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Originally posted by Pugsley_f5
Get her to go to the gym with you and workout with you, not only will she enjoy being with you and doing things with you and respect you more, put she'll prolly also get really Horney watching you lift and flex your muscle, kill three birds with one stone bro.
LOL true
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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