"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Should i be mad at my friend?

warrior1

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Hey fellas. I'm 20 years old and turning 21 this week. Well, i have a couple of good friends that are pretty close to me that we go to the same college. I really dont have that many friends that i hang out with besides them but i have a lot of acquaintances but don't really talk to them. Anyways, this weekend i want to go to the casino and play some poker. I been at the casino with my friend before but that was when i was underaged even though i did play a bit but it was those crappy likes like Pai Gow or whatnot and not poker.

I asked my 2 buddies to go and right now we are seniors/5th year seniors in college. My buddy and I both have 2.8-2.9 GPA's so we are not doing that good. My buddy sort of agreed with me and said sure we can go this weekend since its your birthday. Again, i dont really hang out with other people besides these 2-3 friends of mine. But today i talked to him and he said no. He told me to stop thinking about gambling and poker and focus on school. I told him dude its just one day. He keep saying how i keep always asking him to go yet I never even played ONCE!

He told me he's going to study every single day because he wants his GPA to go up. Yes, i understand that. I respect it. The thing is is one day going to hurt really? I mean its my 21th birthday and i just want to go to casino and be with both my buddies and just eat, play some poker, drink and have some fun yet he says he cant because he will be really studying everyday. He says he refuses to be behind any longer. I do respect how he wants to not be behind in classes but he said if I go, what will happen to my future? I go with you and i will probalby be jobless. Wtf... is one day giong to mess you up?

He says he will go with me after this semester ends and that is in mid December. Again, we are seniors in college so we are pretty much close to be done in school. From my past experiences with woman that i had opportunities to make a move but didn't, this really feels like one of them. I had chance to talk to someone but wussed out. After those days i say there ain't no what ifs and i aint promised another tomrorwo so i just do everything now and just live and have fun. Is that wrong for me to think this way?

It's not like we have exams coming up soon, let alone Finals. If my birhtday was in December, then i will not get mad but this is just the beginning of the school year. Yes we do have readings but is it wrong for me to get mad now? I am getting a bit sad because of this since he is like my real close buddy. We can just go on saturday morning and take the bus and be back saturday at night. But hes says no not going to do it. Then he says i am weak minded because I dont want to wait till december since i told him nobody is promised another day to live. I mean, would my friend even feel bad for me like say in october i die in a car accident, and then he wondered what i said back in september and i never got a chance to go there?

I am really wondering if i am with the wrong people now. I mean if its my buddies birthday whehter its 20th, 21th, 22nd, 23rd etc, i definitely would go and do what he wants to do whether its just clubbing, drinking, just eating dinner or just about anything. I mean its his/her day so i definitely be down with anything. All my past birthdays has just been with my family and it was really nothing special and i thought i was just going to have some fun this year since its my 21st.

So should i get mad at my friend for this? This got me really upset and I am feeling depressed now. I am thinking about just getting new friends because of this. :(
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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typical

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Maybe he had a wake up call and decided he wants to have a really top notch gpa and get set for a good future. Yea you dont know when your going to die but work hard now and you can play later.

He most likly sat down and thought to himself that all he does is bum around with his mates and thats why his marks are crap. Cut the guy some slack for having the balls to say no its his life his choice, your his mate you dont own him.

You sound like a girl like you really do ........ "OMG debbie wont go clubbing with me and the girls shes such a bit(h".

Get my drift. He even offered you a counter with the wait till december, man lighten up its just one birthday plenty more will come, you sound like a person that needs everyone there holding your hand when you do things.
 

warrior1

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yea i know what u mean typical. But the problem is that he has been saying this since sophomore year of college. He told me he will study every day yet I ask him what he did the last week and tells me he did nothing but play computer games. He said dis sophomore and junior year and never really studied that much. He never really sticked to his word pretty much.

Yes i know i sound like a girl a bit but isnt 3 months a bit far away? I mean if its 1-2 weeks later its fine but 3 months? I mean if i was in the same situation as him, I would not really mind 1 day.
 

typical

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warrior1 said:
yea i know what u mean typical. But the problem is that he has been saying this since sophomore year of college. He told me he will study every day yet I ask him what he did the last week and tells me he did nothing but play computer games. He said dis sophomore and junior year and never really studied that much. He never really sticked to his word pretty much.

Yes i know i sound like a girl a bit but isnt 3 months a bit far away? I mean if its 1-2 weeks later its fine but 3 months? I mean if i was in the same situation as him, I would not really mind 1 day.
Then simply your dealing with someone who has some dillusion about what he can and can not do, time to make new friends mate. Harsh I know but first you needa get your future set then go out and party it up .......... you can however do both just takes a bit more effort. He might be placing his failures onto you as a blame and excuse. Ive had a mate like that and the best thing i done was ditch him.

Yea as a mate you care for the fvcker lol but your life first mate. I reckon you needa ditch the party mode till december at least and get you gpa up and all that jazz with school work :)
 

warrior1

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My friend doesnt really chill and have fun. He still plays comptuer games at home in his computer. I wouldnnt call him geeky or whatever but hes a really cool person. I mean if i was in the other siutation i would never do this to my friend. Maybe its because i am too nice of a friend but we're guys.... so you probably know what i mean.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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typical

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Maybe hes a bit more self centered then you are ......... and yea your way too nice mate just a tad too much haha.
 

warrior1

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i really consider him like a brother to tell you the truth which is why. But i dont act that nice to women though :) or else i be in more trouble.

the problem is that hes self centered on a day that doesnt really have signifance. He doesnt have anythign big to do that day... say if he had to go to a relatives wedding or some important meeting. WE both dont even have jobs now nor are we interning.
 

warrior1

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bump. I really want some of you guys opinions about this. I doubt most of you guys have "friends" liek this.
 
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