Starman
Master Don Juan
I wrote this the other day , what do you guys think?
Love, cars, sex and commitment.
Ever notice how getting the girl/guy of your dreams is a similar process as buying/selling a car or a house?
Let me illustrate.
Lets say you own a car, that you really love, it’s been with you for so long, you treat it as if it’s an extension of your entire existence. You wax it, keep it clean, run regular maintenance checks, the whole spiel.
But you come to a point in your life, where you want a new one. SO you decide to sell your car.
But the person you sell it to must meet some special qualifications, because you obviously don’t want to give your car away to just anybody(i.e. your love in a relationship). This person must give the maximum amount of money for it and have the character to treat and love the car as you have.
After showing it to a few prospective buyers. You finally meet somebody that is VERY interested in the car, and promises to treat it with the utmost care. Wow! You never thought this person would come along!
You and the prospective buyer go on a couple of test-drives. This is akin to “dating”, finding out about each other, and wanting to see if you want to pursue the “getting to know you” further.
Both parties are happy..and both want the best for themselves. The seller wants the most cash/best caretaker for the car (i.e. the best life partner for him/herself) and the Buyer wants the car..for the least available price (your date/love) and wants the car to run forever (you).
Phase II
“Do you think I can keep it for the weekend to get a feel of the car?”
RED FLAG
Its human nature to have want we don’t have and pursue to the end of the world to get it. This is akin to a guy/girl that meets somebody new and is very interested, and wants to skip the intimacy level of courtship and get right down to the sex.
Ask any car dealer. He will laugh his balls off at a notion of taking a car home over the weekend, and the answer will usually be a resounding NO. Even though the commission is attractive to the seller, he knows the law of “human gratification”
Once you get what you want, you desire it less or find out you may not want it at all.
This is a pivotal moment in the Sellers position. And you have several options.
If you say, “Yes, Take the care home with you over the weekend and return it.” You run this risk.
1) “The commitment Trap”
You have spent numerous energy and time, trying to sell this car to this ONE person you found to be a promising deal.
The guy uses the car over the weekend (i.e. have sex for women, becoming overly emotional/available for men) and returns the slightly dented from a little fender bender. He is now unsure if he wants the car. And says he will pay for the damages, but isn’t quite sure if he wants the car anymore. He will let you know.
You are furious! You have spent numerous energy and time, trying to sell this car to this ONE person you found to be a promising deal.
He dents the ****in car! Now he is unsure if He wants it??? His interest level has dropped.
You are frantic..This potential seller has strung you along all this time, promising a quick sell, and left you chasing HIM/HER..in order to seal this deal!
Nobody else will probably want the car now, and besides..This guy was your BEST lead! So You press on! Keep in touch with him, tell him about the qualities of the car! (i.e. yourself and what a great partner you would make!)..but just can’t seem to rekindle that original spark of interest the buyer originally had. The deal is breaking apart.
You are even more furious! What a ****in waste of time!! I could KILL this *******!
I know exactly what this feels like. I used to work in Real Estate..selling homes..and working with indecisive buyers. They would show me signs that they are interested to buy a certain home. I would spend MONTHS showing them a place..cleaning the place up, making it look as presentable as possible, and the buyers would string me along for MONTHS and then finally decide..They don’t want the house and they aren’t ready to buy. I could have CHOKED all these people on the spot..but I just grinned , gave them my card and told them to call me when they are serious.
OPTION #2
This is my “you want what you cant have” theory
Telling him The car is available for SALE. It might be sold next week..or it might be here. If he wants it, he is going to have to come up with the cash QUICKLY, before someone else comes and snatches the car (i.e You(the car) are a Great CATCH! If your love interest doesn’t act NOW, you might be with someone else sooner or later)
You’ve got the BUYERS FULL ATTENTION.
Can you imagine a man in Mexico making $300 a year. Who has his eyes on a Ferrari Testarossa? He will break his BACK to try and obtain this vehicle. He REALLY wants it, but it’s realistically out of reach. But he doesn’t give up..he saves and saves and saves. And drives a few ****ty beaters to get him around(i.e. dates losers until he/she finds his “soul mate”)
Lets say that one day, he is able to afford the Ferrari and buys it. He is the happiest man alive.
Option #3
Lets say the buyer BUYS the car. He got what he wanted and is in love with it..it’s the best thing that has happened to his life. He cruises the car, shows it off to his friends, and after years and years of joy, the car somehow begins losing the original attraction that it had to the buyer.
The buyer starts eying other cars in the street with envy..wondering, how it would be to drive that new Lexus. Finally, its time for a new car..something to rejuvenate us, and give us that wide-eyed enthusiasm we had when we first bought this car (Stay with me on this love/commitment analogy)
So you begin to try and sell the old car for a newer , faster, shinier one.
Now that he got what he/she wanted..and has kept the car for a while..does the cycle repeat it self? When does it end?
Love, cars, sex and commitment.
Ever notice how getting the girl/guy of your dreams is a similar process as buying/selling a car or a house?
Let me illustrate.
Lets say you own a car, that you really love, it’s been with you for so long, you treat it as if it’s an extension of your entire existence. You wax it, keep it clean, run regular maintenance checks, the whole spiel.
But you come to a point in your life, where you want a new one. SO you decide to sell your car.
But the person you sell it to must meet some special qualifications, because you obviously don’t want to give your car away to just anybody(i.e. your love in a relationship). This person must give the maximum amount of money for it and have the character to treat and love the car as you have.
After showing it to a few prospective buyers. You finally meet somebody that is VERY interested in the car, and promises to treat it with the utmost care. Wow! You never thought this person would come along!
You and the prospective buyer go on a couple of test-drives. This is akin to “dating”, finding out about each other, and wanting to see if you want to pursue the “getting to know you” further.
Both parties are happy..and both want the best for themselves. The seller wants the most cash/best caretaker for the car (i.e. the best life partner for him/herself) and the Buyer wants the car..for the least available price (your date/love) and wants the car to run forever (you).
Phase II
“Do you think I can keep it for the weekend to get a feel of the car?”
RED FLAG
Its human nature to have want we don’t have and pursue to the end of the world to get it. This is akin to a guy/girl that meets somebody new and is very interested, and wants to skip the intimacy level of courtship and get right down to the sex.
Ask any car dealer. He will laugh his balls off at a notion of taking a car home over the weekend, and the answer will usually be a resounding NO. Even though the commission is attractive to the seller, he knows the law of “human gratification”
Once you get what you want, you desire it less or find out you may not want it at all.
This is a pivotal moment in the Sellers position. And you have several options.
If you say, “Yes, Take the care home with you over the weekend and return it.” You run this risk.
1) “The commitment Trap”
You have spent numerous energy and time, trying to sell this car to this ONE person you found to be a promising deal.
The guy uses the car over the weekend (i.e. have sex for women, becoming overly emotional/available for men) and returns the slightly dented from a little fender bender. He is now unsure if he wants the car. And says he will pay for the damages, but isn’t quite sure if he wants the car anymore. He will let you know.
You are furious! You have spent numerous energy and time, trying to sell this car to this ONE person you found to be a promising deal.
He dents the ****in car! Now he is unsure if He wants it??? His interest level has dropped.
You are frantic..This potential seller has strung you along all this time, promising a quick sell, and left you chasing HIM/HER..in order to seal this deal!
Nobody else will probably want the car now, and besides..This guy was your BEST lead! So You press on! Keep in touch with him, tell him about the qualities of the car! (i.e. yourself and what a great partner you would make!)..but just can’t seem to rekindle that original spark of interest the buyer originally had. The deal is breaking apart.
You are even more furious! What a ****in waste of time!! I could KILL this *******!
I know exactly what this feels like. I used to work in Real Estate..selling homes..and working with indecisive buyers. They would show me signs that they are interested to buy a certain home. I would spend MONTHS showing them a place..cleaning the place up, making it look as presentable as possible, and the buyers would string me along for MONTHS and then finally decide..They don’t want the house and they aren’t ready to buy. I could have CHOKED all these people on the spot..but I just grinned , gave them my card and told them to call me when they are serious.
OPTION #2
This is my “you want what you cant have” theory
Telling him The car is available for SALE. It might be sold next week..or it might be here. If he wants it, he is going to have to come up with the cash QUICKLY, before someone else comes and snatches the car (i.e You(the car) are a Great CATCH! If your love interest doesn’t act NOW, you might be with someone else sooner or later)
You’ve got the BUYERS FULL ATTENTION.
Can you imagine a man in Mexico making $300 a year. Who has his eyes on a Ferrari Testarossa? He will break his BACK to try and obtain this vehicle. He REALLY wants it, but it’s realistically out of reach. But he doesn’t give up..he saves and saves and saves. And drives a few ****ty beaters to get him around(i.e. dates losers until he/she finds his “soul mate”)
Lets say that one day, he is able to afford the Ferrari and buys it. He is the happiest man alive.
Option #3
Lets say the buyer BUYS the car. He got what he wanted and is in love with it..it’s the best thing that has happened to his life. He cruises the car, shows it off to his friends, and after years and years of joy, the car somehow begins losing the original attraction that it had to the buyer.
The buyer starts eying other cars in the street with envy..wondering, how it would be to drive that new Lexus. Finally, its time for a new car..something to rejuvenate us, and give us that wide-eyed enthusiasm we had when we first bought this car (Stay with me on this love/commitment analogy)
So you begin to try and sell the old car for a newer , faster, shinier one.
Now that he got what he/she wanted..and has kept the car for a while..does the cycle repeat it self? When does it end?
