"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Self-deception And The Power Of DeNile

DEKKA

Master Don Juan
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Long time no talky talky guys. I hope all has been well in these annals of cyberspace pseudo-intellectual wankery while I've been gone. Blah.

Anyway I just read that article by doc love about "should you believe her or your own eyes?". It really made me think about something that I am seeing time and time again in all the relationships, would-be-relationships and ended relationships around me... I even recalled times in my own dating history when I was the hapless victim of this something.

It's called self-deception, denial, mental masturbation... whatever word you want to attach to it, it's dangerous. It wastes time.

You've got this guy who either:

a.) thinks he's da sh!t when he's so totally not (which isn't half bad if it's not getting in the way of actual improvement)

b.) accepts bullsh!t excuses for things when he knows full well whats really going on.

c.) settles for women below his standards because he convinced himself he actually had some sort of feelings for them. (the only thing worse than one-itis is one-itis for a woman below your standards.)

d.) COMES TO SOSUAVE and asks questions about something because he hasn't had the balls to admit to himself what he already knows to be true.

e.) A combination of the above.

denial is a great way of protecting your ego, but it hurts more than it does good. if you accept yourself and your situation for how they really are it might hurt a bit but you've just cut through the bullsh!t and been real with yourself. then you can start over and improve with a clean slate.

if you think she's cheating don't wait for her to make you the fool.

if you can sense low IL move on and find someone with high IL.

if you think it might be, it is.

pretty simple but don't ever underestimate the power of denial.

later playas.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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