"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Return of the high school crush

Alber07

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I'd appreciate some advice on this long winded situation I'm about to explain.

About two years ago while still in high school I was one of those really shy guys with no confidence who couldn't possibly talk to girls. There was this one girl who I really like though, she was a bit different to most people, didn't have that many friends but I thought she was just amazing, great personality and she was fvcking gorgeous and does modeling these days. Anyway I obviously didn't dare talk to her so I kept all this to myself. She left my school a couple of months later and I thought I'd never see her again.

Fast forward to about 6 months ago. I'm a completely different person, far more confident and outgoing. Now at uni about 3.5 hours away from where this girl lives. I found her on facebook through chance and added her. We got talking for a while and I eventually admitted how much I had liked her at school (probably a bad move?) anyway, she had apparently liked me at the same time.

We met up a few times after a few weeks of talking and hit it off well. She basically said that she'd like to make a go of it with me, us together but for the next while we couldn't see much of each other because of uni and commitments she had. Basically the problem starts here, after a while she loses interest, it goes completely off the boil and left me a bit confused. She went from seeming like she was in love with me to barely knowing me. I haven't spoken to her for about 2.5 months until today. She calls me and said that when I'm home for summer she wants to take me for a drink to apologise for being a cvnt (her words). I kind of agreed.

I'll be home for a good three months so I'll be able to spend time with her but I don't know if I should. She was like my teenage dream girl and it seemed that when she found that out she played on it before eventually just ditching me.

So do you think I should go ahead and meet up with her? Or forget her as that teenage crush that wasn't meant to be?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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mahoney

Senior Don Juan
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try not to be frightened of this girl

if she wants to hang out, then hang out! just dont make it into some great big drama or bigger than it is
 

PDubb75

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My thinking is, if she brought up that she was a cvnt and apologized without you saying anything about it, it probably didn't happen because of lack of interest. This site preaches the "don't take any sh!t from anyone!" line so much, that I think we sometimes forget they are people too. They make mistakes, they may do things they regret soon after, they may be nervous and simply not know what to do.

But that doesn't mean it's the case. I would keep her actions in the front of your mind and watch for patterns of it happening again.

Do yourself a favor: Don't let yourself be blinded by the thinking of her being the "high school crush that returned". You will cloud your thought process, and probably let things slide that you normally wouldn't.

Aside from that, it's hard to give additional advice, as we have no idea if something could have triggered her actions, based on your post. Just don't treat her like your "dream girl" if you do decide to meet up with her.
 

Alle_Gory

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It's better to try than not try. Worst case you learn something that day.

Relax, she's just some girl from a long time ago. You don't even know if she's still interesting anymore, so I don't see why you're getting all worked up. Your imagination is out of control.
 
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