"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Rethinking some of my old beliefs.

Canadian Catnip

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I've come to a realization just a few days ago and wanted to share it here. I also welcome some feedback.

I used to be a staunch believer in showing women that you are disinterested in them in order to build attraction. But as of late I've rethought that philosophy and now find that being open and friendly and showing that you like a women and that you can show your feelings in a mature way is a lot more attractive.

I used to act disinterested because honestly I was afraid to let women know that I liked them. At the time I was afraid that if they knew I like them they would have some kind of power over me and could hurt me. Whenever they didn't reciprocate any feelings for me I would really feel bad.

Lately though I have been feeling a lot more mature and stronger in my emotions and I am able to show women that I like them without being needy or having any attachment to any outcome.

I've found that women respond a heck of a lot better to my new approach than when I was all cool and disinterested. Someone said something to me one day on the subject and I had a paradigm shift in my thinking. Everything I had experienced before suddenly made sense and I could put the successes together in my mind.

Yes, I could see how women like it when you show them interest. Women may chase you for a time if you act disinterested in them but it in no way did it ever give me any success with landing one of them by using that tactic.

Perhaps it's just my maturity kicking in on me but I think I really had a big revelation on this.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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mb121

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Can you name a practical action that you would take now but wouldn't back then with a girl you liked?
 

AKA FLEX

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I have found that acting disinterested yields no better results than showing a healthy interest. Where you hurt yourself is when you fawn all over them early in the relationship.
 

I.A.F.Y.B.

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Yes! Embrace your sexuality. Do not hide it. Your a man and she is a woman.
 

Canadian Catnip

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mb121 said:
Can you name a practical action that you would take now but wouldn't back then with a girl you liked?
I.A.F.Y.B. said:
Yes! Embrace your sexuality. Do not hide it. Your a man and she is a woman.
Just like I.A.F.Y.B. has said. I let them know I am a man and that I love that they are a women.

Now I let them know I that I find them attractive. I let them know that I want to have sex with them, that I enjoy touching them and like the feel of their body, etc.

Before I used to keep this to myself and if the women made a move I tried to act indifferent and pretend that I could take them or leave them. As I said, they would chase me a bit and increase their game in order to show me that they were interested.

If I acted disinterested for too long they would cool off and eventually get pissed off and not have nothing to do with me.

Now I smile, chat them up and kino them and return the interest level to them.

Of course there is still some calibration I have to do based on the women on how much she needs but I'm learning.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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