Re-Open Question

[milkandcereal]

So I went out with this girl a couple times the weekend before Valentine's. We had a great time, so I asked her out again on Valentine's but she said she was going to be busy babysitting because she hadn't planned on doing anything for it this year. I said no problem, maybe we can get together soon on a different day and she said she'd like that. Only problem is, we haven't really talked since then (figured I should give some space, plus I got really busy), so I feel like I'm kind of stuck in a situation where I need to re-open. Only problem is I'm kind of stuck on how to do it. Would it be a bad idea to say, "Hey haven't heard from ya in awhile, I think I'm starting to forget what you look like. I'll be in your neck of the woods tomorrow after work, we should grab a drink if you're free."?

 

[Deep Dish]

Would it be a bad idea to say, "Hey haven't heard from ya in awhile, I think I'm starting to forget what you look like. I'll be in your neck of the woods tomorrow after work, we should grab a drink if you're free."

It would be a bad idea, you would come off as awkward. You could just say "Let's grab a drink." It's a good idea to be succinct and non-sequitur. It's also suspect she was "babysitting" on Valentine's and that she hasn't spoken to you since, so don't get your hopes up.

 

[Uncharted]

Have you talked to her at all (text, phone, e-mail, anything) since then? If not assume that she is waiting for you to call.

Call her up and tell her (dont ask her) to go out with you for (dinner/drinks/etc) on whatever day you are free. If she is interested she will either say yes or recommend another day. If she says no or doesn't reschedule, don't contact her for a month.

Seriously.

She will contact you if she's interested. If not, then that's two dates in a row that she turned you down. On to the next. Delete her number. Pretend like she died and she's gone bro.

 

[milkandcereal]

Right on, glad I asked. Not getting my hopes up at all. To Uncharted, no I have not talked to her at all since. Thanks for the quick responses.

 

[casaanova]

So I went out with this girl a couple times the weekend before Valentine's. We had a great time, so I asked her out again on Valentine's but she said she was going to be busy babysitting because she hadn't planned on doing anything for it this year. I said no problem, maybe we can get together soon on a different day and she said she'd like that. Only problem is, we haven't really talked since then (figured I should give some space, plus I got really busy), so I feel like I'm kind of stuck in a situation where I need to re-open. Only problem is I'm kind of stuck on how to do it. Would it be a bad idea to say, "Hey haven't heard from ya in awhile, I think I'm starting to forget what you look like. I'll be in your neck of the woods tomorrow after work, we should grab a drink if you're free."?

Yeah, there's another guy in the mix. Women can't stand being single on valentines day (forget what they say), especially if they already have a guy they're interested in. She would have at least tried to get out of babysitting, or at the very least called you the day after to make up for lost time if she was really interested. You just got lost in the rotation while the other guy filled the position, you didn't really do anything wrong. Next her and spin some more plates - my two cents

 

[milkandcereal]

So I figured I'd post an update:

On Wednesday sent her a text and said "Hey let's grab drinks tomorrow" (thanks for the advice on simplifying it). She said she'd love to and had been wondering if she was going to hear from me again. It was kind of awkward at first since we hadn't talked to each other in awhile, but after a few drinks the conversation relaxed and started to flow like it had on the first couple dates. One kind of weird thing- while we were out (beginning of the date, maybe 20 minutes into it) she mentioned that her Valentine's this year was lonely. I didn't know what to say to this (I mean, it kind of put a damper on the mood that had just started to build, and plus I'd just asked her out for that day... **** me, right?) so I tried to come up with something clever to say, which turned out to be "You know, when you smile your lips kind of quiver- almost like a cute little nervous twitch." Immediately provoked a smile and changed the subject. I'm sure there's a plethora of better things I could have said in that situation, but I'm not all that quick on my feet in those situations, and anyway it seemed to work. Long story short- went out with the girl again, got laid. Thanks again for the advice, pretty sure I was way over-thinking the whole re-open thing.