Starman
Master Don Juan
I noticed the other day I was on the train..there were alot of seats available, and this guy who got on, comes and sits right next to me.
I immediately thought WTF!!! I had to put my newspaper away, lose comfort level, my annoyance level went up, and felt this guy was violating my personal "bubble" space
Everyone has this bubble, its a mental sphere we draw around our bodies, and whoever violates this bubble, we start becoming agitated, threatened, and defensive
think of police interrogators who get into the suspects face and start yelling, their intention is to establish dominance and force a confession through violating the suspects personal space and make him uncomfortable
I have heard that Americans are VERY socially aware of proxemics..or the distance someone stands next to you
"Research has indicated that Americans are especially conscious of their personal space and allow much less intrusion than do other nationalities, even with those people considered to be friends."
WHich brings me to the topic of proxemics when you are trying to DJ a chick.
This is VERY important in when and how you apply KINO.
Kino in my experience has DEFINITELY opened women up to me and made our interaction warm and receptive.
But I think one important factor to consider, is to gauge the physical proximity level of women before stepping in their personal bubble and applying KINO.
Look at her body language..when you step forward..does she step back? or come closer?
When you go into her ear to whisper something, does she come closer? or pull her head back and raise her hand to guard you from bumping into each other?
These are clues you MUST pick up and pay close attention to before applying KINO.
otherwise it will be considered as FORCED INTRUSION on her personal space and make her feel uncomfortable (just like the police interrogator)
This has also been examined in Body Language. It is KEY to pay attention to these cues and assessing how it will affect your game.
I have not read anyone's experiences in this, but would like to hear some.
for me, I cant stand MALES who intrude my space, I Immediately get into "defensive mode" (maybe men are just more territorial?)
But I have had women at the office and clubs stand about 7 inches from me when we were conversing, most women who stood too close to me, I immediately thought "She is in my personal space..but maybe she WANTS to be?" (i.e. maybe she wants to get more intimate?)
If this is my train of thought and its correct, I assume most women think the same way, that when you invade their personal space you want to either a) Get more intimate or b) making them feel uncomfortable
or maybe A leads to B
Any thoughts/experiences?
I immediately thought WTF!!! I had to put my newspaper away, lose comfort level, my annoyance level went up, and felt this guy was violating my personal "bubble" space
Everyone has this bubble, its a mental sphere we draw around our bodies, and whoever violates this bubble, we start becoming agitated, threatened, and defensive
think of police interrogators who get into the suspects face and start yelling, their intention is to establish dominance and force a confession through violating the suspects personal space and make him uncomfortable
I have heard that Americans are VERY socially aware of proxemics..or the distance someone stands next to you
"Research has indicated that Americans are especially conscious of their personal space and allow much less intrusion than do other nationalities, even with those people considered to be friends."
WHich brings me to the topic of proxemics when you are trying to DJ a chick.
This is VERY important in when and how you apply KINO.
Kino in my experience has DEFINITELY opened women up to me and made our interaction warm and receptive.
But I think one important factor to consider, is to gauge the physical proximity level of women before stepping in their personal bubble and applying KINO.
Look at her body language..when you step forward..does she step back? or come closer?
When you go into her ear to whisper something, does she come closer? or pull her head back and raise her hand to guard you from bumping into each other?
These are clues you MUST pick up and pay close attention to before applying KINO.
otherwise it will be considered as FORCED INTRUSION on her personal space and make her feel uncomfortable (just like the police interrogator)
This has also been examined in Body Language. It is KEY to pay attention to these cues and assessing how it will affect your game.
I have not read anyone's experiences in this, but would like to hear some.
for me, I cant stand MALES who intrude my space, I Immediately get into "defensive mode" (maybe men are just more territorial?)
But I have had women at the office and clubs stand about 7 inches from me when we were conversing, most women who stood too close to me, I immediately thought "She is in my personal space..but maybe she WANTS to be?" (i.e. maybe she wants to get more intimate?)
If this is my train of thought and its correct, I assume most women think the same way, that when you invade their personal space you want to either a) Get more intimate or b) making them feel uncomfortable
or maybe A leads to B
Any thoughts/experiences?