Profile Help

[ragwood]

This is the content of a profile I put up on Okcupid. The self summary part is stolen from the internet. I looked up "good profiles" on google and found it, it got an "A" by the writter of teh article. It was originally written by a women so I had to change guys to girls.

My concern was the first line sounds "negative" about not liking girls.

The movies, music, book part is all legit. I'm sure a lot of girls will find philosophy boring but ideally I would find a girl with a philosophy degree herself.

Then I tried two joke responses: Maybe those come off as "dorky" or "infantile" especially since I'm 31 years old



My Self-Summary

I don’t like most girls, but… I am not interested in most girls and besides perhaps that what makes those few unique individuals that I do connect with all more special. Myself – restless, analytical, and opinionated. I am not offended by a dirty joke and can dish out one of my own. I am independent but far from being a hermit. Sarcasm is a spice of life, so bring it on. Timeless books
and movies that make you wonder for days about whose side you are on put great flavor into many of my evenings.

What’s your story? What are you greatest pet-peeves and what makes you weak in your knees from joy and happiness.”





The first things people usually notice about me

My rancid B.O. , my shaggy beard, and my cart full of cans.
Edited by


My favorite books, movies, music, and food Music: Bob Dylan, Tool, Guns N Roses, Pink Floyd, Beach Boys, Beatles, Led Zeppelin, A perfect circle, Peter Tchaikovsky, Gustav Mahler

Movies: High Fidelity, Knocked Up, the Big Lebowski, Back to the Future,

Books: Berkley's "A treatise conncerning the principles of Human Knowledge", Leibnez's "Discourse on Metaphysics and Monadology" Des Carttes "Meditations on First Philosophy"
Edited by
The six things I could never do without

Philosophytalk.org
My dvd collection of the "The Office"
Bob Dylan's "Time out of Mind" Album
Dental Floss
Norm Macdonlad
Idealism
Edited by


I spend a lot of time thinking about

What are horseshoes? What does a horseshoe do? Are there any horsesocks?

 

[Wilko]

Haha, me again Ragwood, you may want to take a restraining order out against me. I'm a smart guy too Ragwood, many of us here are. Now as much as we'd all like it to be otherwise, it's ill-advised to appeal to women with your intellectualism, and the real irony/tragedy is that it's actually smarter girls that respond best to cruder displays of masculinity. Naturally there's a part of you that rightfully wants to say, screw you world! One day the geek shall inherit the earth and ladies will worship our hot-throbbing gray-matter, but until then....some specific improvements.

The Self Summary starts off with a qualifying statement about women, I understand what you're trying to do there, you're implying "I choose", that's the right idea, but the wrong place in the profile for that.

Then there's a short list of adjectives "restless, analytical and opinionated", try, try, try to avoid this, if only because this is what EVERYONE does. If you're restless, describe your shifting interests or addiction to Ridalin. If you're analytical, share a really interesting observation. If you're opinionated give us a "you know what the problem with X is?!" This will speak much more for you than a list.

Then you describe your sense of humour; you like dirty jokes and sarcasm. Just avoid talking about a "sense of humour" altogether and let the jokes speak for themselves. Kudos to you Ragwood, you do actually back it up with a genuinely funny gag. Normally you have to be really careful with self-deprecating humour (it's often self-defeating) but the absurd contrast between intellectual and crazy homeless man works a treat. It tells people one, you really can be funny, two, you dont take yourself too seriously and three, you dont assume moral superiority because you're smarter than the average bear. I'd like to see some version of that gag make the final cut

There's a little bit of "I'm this, but not that" That's a pretty tired technique.

Right, more lists, unfortunately they're pretty ineffective. Consider your readers, lists don't make women feel anything, hell, I'm not sure I respond to them either. So you're a voracious reader and student of philosophy, with pretty good taste in music and film, rather than the aforementioned lists, how about a "candid" photo of you with a few of your favourite titles, one of these evenings with "great flavour" you mention, it will send the message you're looking for.

Hell, who wouldn't want to commit unspeakable carnal acts upon a bookish
freshman, I get that that's what you're into, but your profile is pushing away every other "type" of girl, that's the reason for the low response so far. I think these girls are actually disqualifying themselves against your profile, even the uggos and the fattys.

 

[Wilko]

It's very important I add something. You have to rethink an assumption I can see you've already made.

Ragwood, you simply can't expect a woman to fufill or supplement your intellectual needs.

Women are for fufilling your sexual and emotional needs.

Separate them, it's gonna make things much easier on you.

 

[Wilko]

Check this out, it's my idea for your profile based on what I've learned about you so far.

My five year plan for success.

First I'm going to make an epic double album of classic stadium rock full of
indulgent twenty minute guitar solos. It will be lauded by critics and
referenced constantly by hipsters despite the fact that no-one bought it or
listened to it. My groupies will look like Ayn Rand in torn stockings and
black eyeliner.

Then I'll make a stunning foray into screenwriting with the first time-travelling, road-trip, romantic-comedy, cop-movie. It will win prizes in Cannes, but be largely ignored in America. It also turns out the be the film that ends Michael Cerra's [pick an actor, any actor]career.

Finally I hope to write a groundbreaking but impenetrable work of philosophy.
The kind of thing that ageing professors will quote to get into the pants of
juicy college sophomores.

When I'm done with all that I might walk the earth with naught but my shaggy beard and cart full of cans.....and my groupies.