Please, I Think She is Pregnant

[SebastianS]

Hi,

I am Brazilian, so please forgive my Tarzan English. Actually I have a big problema and I need your opinnion and advice. I have been going with a 20-year-old woman for 7 months and we have had sex for 5 months. Since the beginning, she never wanted me to use condons, always told me she was using a long-acting injectable for not to be pregnant. So I never worried about this subject until two weeks ago. She told me she is pregnant.

I told her that I cannot afford a baby, I study and have no money and time to afford a baby. I told her to abbort is the best solution for her. I do not want to ruin her life, that she should keep studying and if she had a baby she could not study. She is just doubtful. I dont know how to convince her to abbort. I need your help, please.

Have you been in a situation like this? How I convince her to abbort. Please, I need your opinnions and advices, friends.

Sebastian

 

[PDubb75]

First of all, your English (at least in writing) is better than 90% of the people on this forum.

Now to the issue. The problem here is you are getting into an area with possible conflicting morals. There isn't a cut-and-dry "right" solution here. If you are for abortions, and she is against, neither one of you is "wrong".

I'm going to choose to not share my opinions on the subject, and just give some advice.

You made it clear to her that you don't have time or money to support a child. That's fine, in the sense that it's probably true. However, if this baby is born, morally you have the obligation to do what you can to help out. And depending on the situation, that moral obligation could turn into a legal one (child support).

My suggestion to you is, if she wants to have this baby, chances are she is going to. Unfortunately, this is a consequence of having sex. Especially without a condom with someone you barely know. The smartest thing you could have done to avoid this issue is to use one anyway. But, no point in looking back now.

Hopefully if this baby is born, you will do what you can for it. It is not the fault of the child, and his/her life should not be sh!t because of it.

I personally know 2 people (at least that I have talked to about it) that have looked into abortions. One got one, one didn't. The one that got the abortion has suffered from severe depression ever since. She didn't want to have one, but got forced by her boyfriend, and she hasn't been the same since. The one that didn't get one has had financial troubles, but has not regretted her decision at all.

I know there are opposites to both of these examples, but I'm just telling you what I've seen personally.

 

[Gray The Prince]

http://www.babynames.com/

 

[J Roc]

google "tom leykis hail mary"