Pimpologist
Don Juan
Conversational Tip #1: Establishing Conversational Balance
A great way to increase a woman’s interest level is to ease them into asking you colloquial questions to give them the illusion of being more involved in the pimpin process. Most women have trouble keeping the conversation going when first meeting a guy because they’re either nervous, lack sufficient social skill (has little experience with being pimped on), or are too preoccupied with answering one of your questions to be able to think of things to ask you (this is the most common reason)…or a combination of the three. If she doesn’t exhibit one of those three characteristics, then it’s a sign that she’s uninterested and/or has a boyfriend and doesn’t want to lead you on.
If she has been asking questions in a follow-up type manner, then that’s a very good sign that she can “walk and chew gum” and that her interest level is high/increasing and she is becoming more comfortable in your presence. However, if you happen to approach an interested but socially underdeveloped girl, then you must take the initiative and create opportunities for her to ask you questions.
The techniques I use to boost the conversation include but are not limited to:
1. Making a comment about what you recently, presently, or will have done.
2. Stating an opinion and supporting it.
3. Making a comment about how or what you feel like and why.
4. Or simply saying something that she can easily follow up on…an invitation for questions per se.
A key point to keep in mind is the relevance that your comment(s) should have with the subject that you two were on or would like to be on. As you become more skilled at employing this tactic into your approach/conversations, you’ll begin planning and timing the questions and topics you bring up in order to put her unknowingly into an ‘eliciting values position’ where she feels she’s conversing naturally and effortlessly (which she is).
This is not only beneficial for her psyche but it’s also beneficial for you. As she gains more comfort with the conversation, so will you. In fact, the rapport will instantly increase from whatever level it was previously on. Furthermore, as her comfort level increases, the rapport will be more “relationship like” and it gives her a feeling of “chemistry” between you two because of how well you two have clicked.
Say you meet a woman at a bookstore (Borders is excellent): After an introduction, bring up the subject of books by asking her what book she’s looking for or what she’s reading. Then follow up with a couple more questions depending on what her answers were.
Typical follow up questions for short, unseeded answers include, “So how often do you come down to the bookstore?”…“ So is that book worth buying?”(she will usually tell you why which should give you some seeds, if not then ask why, then gauge her interest in the way she answers).
When the opportunity presents itself (she has not been as involved in the questioning process as much as you would like her to be), then utilize the conversational booster tactics by saying something in the lines of: why you came to the bookstore, what you plan on doing, what book you’re looking for, what you think of the bookstore, the people, the books they have, what you think of the coffee shop they have, why you think it’s so busy/slow today, what you’re feeling like (happy, tired, energetic, angry)… “I feel so good right now b/c…”, what you think you’ll feel like after the week or what you were feeling like earlier and why…etc. Make sure you give her enough seeds to water so it’s clear that you want her to pick-up more of the conversation. When she starts expressing her thoughts and questions more comfortably…you’re in!
Now keep in mind that you are still being “mysterious” in that you aren’t revealing too much personal information right off the bat. The lighter the conversation, the better (aka. flirting)…don’t go into deep, serious facts and feelings in the initial stages of your pimpin. Your goal is to make the conversation as smooth and as natural as you can by getting her just as involved in the pick-up process as you are. Sometimes you won’t even need to boost the conversation, but when you do need to, giving her seeds to pickup on is a great way.
Conclusion:
Make sure the approach/conversations are well balanced. I live by the 40/60 method, where 40% of the conversation is you talking while the other 60% is her talking. This calculates into approximately 2 minutes of you actually talking for every 5 minutes of the conversation.
Here is a guideline on how the break ups should be:
Of your 40%…25-30% should be you asking questions and paraphrasing and the other 10-15% should be you answering questions and throwing out seeds to establish balance in the conversation when you sense the percentages becoming skewed towards her direction. Of her 60%…10-15% should be her asking you questions and the other 45-50% should be her answering your questions.
[This message has been edited by Pimpologist (edited 12-30-2001).]
A great way to increase a woman’s interest level is to ease them into asking you colloquial questions to give them the illusion of being more involved in the pimpin process. Most women have trouble keeping the conversation going when first meeting a guy because they’re either nervous, lack sufficient social skill (has little experience with being pimped on), or are too preoccupied with answering one of your questions to be able to think of things to ask you (this is the most common reason)…or a combination of the three. If she doesn’t exhibit one of those three characteristics, then it’s a sign that she’s uninterested and/or has a boyfriend and doesn’t want to lead you on.
If she has been asking questions in a follow-up type manner, then that’s a very good sign that she can “walk and chew gum” and that her interest level is high/increasing and she is becoming more comfortable in your presence. However, if you happen to approach an interested but socially underdeveloped girl, then you must take the initiative and create opportunities for her to ask you questions.
The techniques I use to boost the conversation include but are not limited to:
1. Making a comment about what you recently, presently, or will have done.
2. Stating an opinion and supporting it.
3. Making a comment about how or what you feel like and why.
4. Or simply saying something that she can easily follow up on…an invitation for questions per se.
A key point to keep in mind is the relevance that your comment(s) should have with the subject that you two were on or would like to be on. As you become more skilled at employing this tactic into your approach/conversations, you’ll begin planning and timing the questions and topics you bring up in order to put her unknowingly into an ‘eliciting values position’ where she feels she’s conversing naturally and effortlessly (which she is).
This is not only beneficial for her psyche but it’s also beneficial for you. As she gains more comfort with the conversation, so will you. In fact, the rapport will instantly increase from whatever level it was previously on. Furthermore, as her comfort level increases, the rapport will be more “relationship like” and it gives her a feeling of “chemistry” between you two because of how well you two have clicked.
Say you meet a woman at a bookstore (Borders is excellent): After an introduction, bring up the subject of books by asking her what book she’s looking for or what she’s reading. Then follow up with a couple more questions depending on what her answers were.
Typical follow up questions for short, unseeded answers include, “So how often do you come down to the bookstore?”…“ So is that book worth buying?”(she will usually tell you why which should give you some seeds, if not then ask why, then gauge her interest in the way she answers).
When the opportunity presents itself (she has not been as involved in the questioning process as much as you would like her to be), then utilize the conversational booster tactics by saying something in the lines of: why you came to the bookstore, what you plan on doing, what book you’re looking for, what you think of the bookstore, the people, the books they have, what you think of the coffee shop they have, why you think it’s so busy/slow today, what you’re feeling like (happy, tired, energetic, angry)… “I feel so good right now b/c…”, what you think you’ll feel like after the week or what you were feeling like earlier and why…etc. Make sure you give her enough seeds to water so it’s clear that you want her to pick-up more of the conversation. When she starts expressing her thoughts and questions more comfortably…you’re in!
Now keep in mind that you are still being “mysterious” in that you aren’t revealing too much personal information right off the bat. The lighter the conversation, the better (aka. flirting)…don’t go into deep, serious facts and feelings in the initial stages of your pimpin. Your goal is to make the conversation as smooth and as natural as you can by getting her just as involved in the pick-up process as you are. Sometimes you won’t even need to boost the conversation, but when you do need to, giving her seeds to pickup on is a great way.
Conclusion:
Make sure the approach/conversations are well balanced. I live by the 40/60 method, where 40% of the conversation is you talking while the other 60% is her talking. This calculates into approximately 2 minutes of you actually talking for every 5 minutes of the conversation.
Here is a guideline on how the break ups should be:
Of your 40%…25-30% should be you asking questions and paraphrasing and the other 10-15% should be you answering questions and throwing out seeds to establish balance in the conversation when you sense the percentages becoming skewed towards her direction. Of her 60%…10-15% should be her asking you questions and the other 45-50% should be her answering your questions.
[This message has been edited by Pimpologist (edited 12-30-2001).]
