Open Car Doors, or NOT??

[vicki]

Here's a quandry for guys. Do you open her door or not? On every date? After youre in a relationship?

If you want to make an impression, do it!!!!

 

[jonny football hero]

Well this is pretty obvious. If you get out and she doesn'tthen you open the door
However conversely, if you get out and she does desicion made

and by the way. This isn't a tip.

 

[Vigilante7]

i have a question for u vicki, i ALWAYS keep the door open for girls at school and they say 'thanks' but how do i know theyre taking it as:

1) 'He is a gentlemen for opening or door'

or

2) 'He is pathetic, and wants to get with me'

----

Ive gotten mixed reactions for both, so im not sure

 

[il_duce]

Originally posted by Vigilante7
i have a question for u vicki, i ALWAYS keep the door open for girls at school and they say 'thanks' but how do i know theyre taking it as:

1) 'He is a gentlemen for opening or door'

or

2) 'He is pathetic, and wants to get with me'

----

Ive gotten mixed reactions for both, so im not sure

It should be #1...it's just a plain friendly thing to do. Come on, you're opening the door for her, not number closing her. It's no big deal. I do it all the time, for women and men, strangers and friends.

 

[Superman X]

Opening doors, as well as all other forms of chivalry, is crap. Why? It's supplicating. It's saying that you have to give her special treatment to make up for you lack of sexual value. Women are biologically incapable of being attracted to a guy who supplicates.

-Dan

 

[Eternal]

Moved to Discussion Forum.

 

[LostbutFound]

opening a door shows you're a gentleman. It can never hurt to do it, for a girl or anybody. Its shows class, and it shows that you're not a creep. It also shows respect and that you're a stand-up guy.

It especially works wonders for women. I doesnt matter how they take it (hes a gentleman, or hes pathetic...as you put it) Chances are high that they are gonna think you're a gentleman. Its not gonna make them jump on your bones or anything, but its a start.

Little trick for you. It was used in "A Bronx Tale" but it is not just from that movie. Its been used by men long before that movie even came out. My father (Italian) taught it to me, and his father and so on. Open the car door for her, walk around back and look through the window. If she dont unlock the door for you, then shes selfish and into only herself. If she does unlock it, shes not into herself and she cares about other people, mainly you.

NOTE: This dont work on all cars, namely the ones with the keyless entry that unlocks all doors. But if she tries and open the door anyway... shes a keeper, sort of. Dont base your opinion on just that one instance. But you should be able to ease up on your gaurd a little.

 

[WestCoaster]

Yes, always do!

It's not supplicating as Superman said ... this is another part of the decline of the American Male. They're clueless in how to handle themselves in front of women.

While I've posted often on the p-ssification of American men, being CLASSY is not AFC, it is the right thing to do, period. Women LOVE it when men open doors for them and all alpha (real men) open doors for women. They're not worried about what the woman thinks and they don't think it's supplicating them.

I open lots of doors for women all day, cute, homely, fat, thin, just right, all kinds of women. I open the door and smile and ALWAYS get a thank you, smile.

Have we gotten so hardened and bitter that we can't give a nice gesture. And didn't your dad's teach you right? Superman, you are definitely NOT superman but a weak man who is so worried about what women think of you that you in turn are weak.

Be confident, be strong, be ****y, be confident. If a woman can't handle a nice gesture then she's not the one for you.

I'm amazed at some of these posts.

 

[AFK Protector]

.....just open the door. Don't look around and wait for girls to come by and open it. If they happen to be close behind you, hold it open for them. If not, then forget it. You will look like a lame waiting for a girl to go before you when she is 20 paces behind you. I open the door a lot for ladies and they always say, "thank you" or, "the rest of you should be a gentleman like AFK Protecotr" etc. Yea, kind of sappy ****, but hey, I earn respect that way. I'm not like the other guys who are just ***** hounds. I'm a man, and I show that I know how to treat a woman and respect her. The ladies realize this too. I think that in this long process of becoming a DJ, people are looking too hard for a formula. Do what you think is right. Don't forget that if everyone became DJish, you would be back where you started: like everyone else.

Think about it.

 

[coldcoal]

I've always considered that the difference between a gentleman and a supplicating chump is that the chump expects special brownie points for the effort...and gets bitter when it doesn't help his cause.

 

[AFK Protector]

I couldn't agree more. I live by this quote:

Don't expect anything from anyone and you'll never be disappointed.

I don't apply this vice versa as shown by my mad door opening skills.

 

[Kineti[C]harm]

Open the damn door! I also open house/buildingdoors on dates (especially first dates)! When a girl cooked for me I even helped with the dishes, cleaning them off and putting them in the dishwasher!

She was really impressed by my acting... That is opening door, helping with dishes etc! I was stupid though and started seeing another girl the day after and I was very stupid. This girl called/SMS(TXTD) our fellow female friends almost every SINGLE day for 3 weeks asking what I was upto (in those 3 weeks I sent aprox 3 SMS to her....). Finally they told her I was seeing someone else. God that fvcked me over and she got MAD pissed and wouldn't see me. The dumb thing was that I was completely broke two of those weeks so I actually couldn't see her due to 20 min traveling distance with buss...

Fun thing was that I saw her out friday or something and tried apologizing (Ye FVCK IT I DO ACTUALLY APOLOGIZE. And besides I did treat her like ****)... She said lets just drop it and all that and I just went dancing. Whole time I was dancing she was looking at me and you could see the sadness inn her eyes! Sooooo I'm thinking I'm gonna try and madgame her on the side abit later on!

But anyways, being a gentleman = BIG YES if it fits your style. If you are the badass motharfvckar rockstar type then no... I'm the boyish player that dresses suave (shirt, dressjacket etc) and even though I'm a player I have Style and I'm a gentleman when the situation calls for it!

 

[Mr. Delicious]

I think some of you read the title wrong. It says should I open CAR doors not building doors. Anyway, some girls I have opened car doors before but it never felt right so i stopped. Building doors yes i open them of course for the ladies.

 

[uniassign]

If you are going to open doors, you have to do other gentlemenly things as well, otherwise it would not be consistent.

Eg: this means you will have to pay for the date as well, walk on the outside of the curb, stand up when the lady joins/leaves the table, help put on her coat etc.

You can't just go for the opening of doors.

 

[mrsoy]

stand at the door and be like "so you gunna open the door for me or what?" thatll get a smile and sometimes an open door

 

[ChesterB]

newbie question

Now let me ask a newbie question:
How do you open building doors for women properly?
If the door opens towards the outside it's clear: I pull the door open, then hold it, until she passed into the building.
But what if the door opens towards the inside (as do most building doors)?
Do I enter the building and hold the door from there or do I stand in the door frame until she passed (can be difficult, if the door is narrow)?

 

[Abbott]

I can't believe what I'm seeing!!

There are FOURTEEN replies on this topic??

I can't believe the question came up. It's like asking whether or not men should wear trousers in public.

There is no question. There is no debate. If it's your car, you open the door for any passenger who may ride in it. Keyless entry or not (by the way I think that technology is new-fangled and kind of "weirds me out," so to speak.).

I do it for everyone, whether it's my friends or even one of my parents. I'd do it for women I'm romantically interested in except that a) I don't "get" women, and b) even if I did, I'd probably tell her to get there on her own. I'm no 'nice guy.'

Open car doors for people is also like opening building doors for someone who's right behind you. You don't wonder whether you should or not. You just do.

Ben

 

[drixsa]

Originally posted by Superman X
Opening doors, as well as all other forms of chivalry, is crap. Why? It's supplicating. It's saying that you have to give her special treatment to make up for you lack of sexual value. Women are biologically incapable of being attracted to a guy who supplicates.

-Dan

You have got to be kidding me, this has to be the most AFC i have ever heard (ironically enough!)

I open doors for women, because i was raised that way and i enjoy being chivalorous(sp?) it comes more natural to me then to most fellows.

The truth is whether you open the door for her or not probably won't matter in the long run or even the shortrun. I can imagine two situations oh how girls would think in this situation:

"Wow, he opened up the door, no one/not enough men do that for me"

or

"Check, he opened up the doors, consistently"

but guys it really is not that big of a deal. Putting deap thought into this and being and idiot *cough*Superman X *cough* is what is going to stop you from getting laid.

Nest Topic: Should I give her my coat if she is cold?

 

[Don Juanabbe]

Well, up here in Canuckland, everyone holds the door open for everyone, it's just the way we are, so women aren't exactly gonna think I'm doin' it to get down her pants. We have to hold doors for people, it's just the way we've been programmed. Nothing wrong with it, perfectly acceptable behaviour. I hold the door open for guys, women, kids, dogs, u name it.

 

[Mac]

Open the car doors on a date.

This usually gets positive responses. Girls usually seem flattered. As many of them dont encounter this behavior form guys very often. They will feel special.

She wont think you are a p*ssy becuase you open the door. If she thinks this its because of something else you've done. And if she does think your a p*ssy, do you really want to be going out with a girl that doesnt see your nice gestures making them feel special. If this is the case they are stuck up. But this will be rare.

This shouldnt be that big of a deal. A detail noting perhaps, but this will not make or break your game either way.

-Mac