Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Online Dating - First meeting FR, looking for advice

Jifto

Don Juan
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Hi all!

I recently got back into the game after breaking things off with an abusive, albeit smoking hot girl. I started off by doing online dating because I live in a suburb of a bigger city and don't have a friends in the area that like to go out. Anyway, I've been talking to a few girls, got a few numbers and this is what went down on my first meetup.

The Online Process
I commented on something this girl had on her profile, she messaged back, I suggested meeting up and she agreed (thanks Corey Wayne!). Her pictures were cute, not super attractive, but definitely cute and she seemed like an interesting person.

The Meetup
We met for coffee (late night coffee, but she said she doesn't drink). Wow, while the face was the same, she did not look like her pictures. I'd estimate she was 35-40 pounds heavier than any picture indicated. Also, she had mentioned she was active, into crossfit, etc, so I wasn't anticipating such a big girl. At this moment I realized that I wasn't into it, but I thought "hey, this is a new to you Jifto. What would the DJs do? Use this opportunity to learn. Might as well stick it out." (Question 1: Should I just have left then?)

We had a good talk. Felt like an interview almost at the beginning, but became more relaxed. She was very nice and seemed like a genuine person, but physically I wasn't into it even a little bit. Nevertheless, I pretended in my head like she was an attractive bird and laid down my best stuff. She seemed to be really feeling it.

After 45 minutes, I said I had to be getting back to do a bit of late night work, and I could tell that she was disappointed. She asked "do you have a strict bedtime?" and said "I hope I get to see you again."

I thanked her for meeting up, she gave me a hug, and that was that.

Question 2: I'm not going to see this girl again. Is any explanation warranted or just ghost her?
Question 3: I'm pleased to have the experience, even if it didn't go anywhere, but how can I avoid such drastic surprises w/r/t appearance in the future?

Thanks gents!
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Jifto

Don Juan
Joined
May 20, 2017
Messages
108
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70
Also she lives in the apartment complex next to me...not really going to matter I assume, but I'd like to be classy
 
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