OMFG...a real DJ needs real advice

[random afc]

To my recollection, i've never asked for help on a forum, but now i'm pissed and confused and in serious need for help. Okay so here's the situation...

I'm going out with this girl who is completely awesome, and i've become a damn good dj in my time, so i'm dj'ing her perfectly, and things are PERFECT (so perfect that i would never say anything about it as to not jinx it) for the last 3 months. then all this wierd **** happens this weekend. well i found out that she's all confused about our relationship. like we were almost to the point of saying ILU, even though we are both completely realisitc about dating and crap. anyways, she told me she needed time to figure shiat out, and so i was like, ok, and i'm giving it to her. anyways, i was in total control of a perfect relationship with like the hottest girl i have ever met.

anyways, the perfect relationship went to hell. and it's all because of ONE SINGLE MF'ing GD sentence that SHE misunderstood. so what it all came down to, and unbeknownst to me until 3 minutes ago, she THINKS i told her or implied that i loved her. and i mean, i might as well have, but i'm a DJ, blah blah blah, and so that scared her, becuz she is as realistic about that shiat as most of us here. anyways, what happened is that she thinks i told her or implied it, and the L-bomb f*ed everything up. btw, i definatley did not say/imply it, but she must have misunderstood it from something that i said when we were talking about the presence of love.

like in all honesty, this is the hottest girl my age i have ever met and we had the PERFECT relationship, all until this happened. and what pisses me off more is that i tried DAMN hard and made absolutley sure that i would never say anything like that or give her that impression. we both know we care for eachother so much, like bordering on love, but both of us afraid to admit/think it, especially her.

okay, well i need help, i'm like freakin out man. how can i convince her that i never told her that i 'loved' her, or something. how can i get out of this alive?

 

[Ded_Skin_Mask13]

umm. unfortunately, that is how a lot of my friend's relationships **** up when they seem to be going smoothly, those 3 forsaken words....I LOVE YOU....don't ever tell a girl you love her or even worse ask if/how much she loves you.......bad bad bad.......i have learned from ppl's mistake and that is this one.....girls can't handle that, so they sort of panic you could say(what have i gotten into?) type of ****............the closest thing you can say to your gf that is from the "heart" is to tell her how special she is to you, and how she has inspired you to be a different person and **** like that, but don't ever talk about love.........i think that is a very very good thing to post or to ask......and my advise is..................don't say I LOVE YOU until you both are serious serious about the relationship, not some 3 month trek.......good post and if you think with your mind and a true DJ you'll find a way to reconcilliate, but if it doesn't work out.....FORGET HER sadly........

 

[Ronny_Neumonic II]

one possible, maybe risky thing to do would be to ljbf her for a few weeks so she would assume that you didn't "love" her. But...she might take it the wrong way and get with someone else or sumthin

 

[random afc]

yeah, i know the "i love you rules" i guess, and i sure tried my damndest to never talk about that word. i never said or implied it, but somehow she misinterpreted me, and now evreything's all f*ed up. the problem is, is that she is just way too damn pretty to be single for long enough to get her to like me again. goddam, o well, i think we can work something out so that we can be fvckbuddies, or we'll get back together. shiat, any more advice would help.

 

[Ded_Skin_Mask13]

but my friend, it doens't matter wheter you impied, sang it, or whatever from the past couple of relationships a couple of my friend's have had, those three words are the demise of such a beautiful thing........learn from it man, no matter how much you wanna say it, don't......better yet, act on it, show your appreciation more through actions...........but if you must say something to her that is close to I LOVE YOU,,,you should say something like "you are such a special person to me" period something simple............

 

[seloifter]

If the situation is as bad as you're making it out to be, then I'm gonna give you some really tough advice.... I doubt you'll take it, but it just may be the only way you could stay with this girl (ironically enough)

end the relationship now. OK, end is a little harsh. Just do one of those "we need a break" things.
Why would you do such a stupid thing?
Right now she thinks you love her. This gives her power. And it makes her uneasy.
If you "break up with her", it will make her wonder "wait, does he really love me?".... absense makes the heart grow fonder.....
I wouldn't be surprised if she ended up calling you some time later talking about getting back together.... if not you could even bring it up

but right now it seems your relationship is ****ed..... my advice seems brash, but imo it's your best shot....... think about it hard, change it as you please..... but remember, you need to re-take all that power, and bring back the mystery......

 

[Nocturnal]

Originally posted by Ronny_Neumonic II
one possible, maybe risky thing to do would be to ljbf her for a few weeks so she would assume that you didn't "love" her. But...she might take it the wrong way and get with someone else or sumthin

are you crazy, risk the greatly probable possibility that she will believe he lost interest and will do so herself?

what i would do, is tell her she misunderstood you, and that at this point you can't consider anything as love, to you it takes a long long time to build, blah blah blah. but tell her you're still attracted to her and then throw in some c+f.

and as to the guy who said end the relationship... lets be realistic here ok? what will this accomplish? he's interested in the "perfect catch" right now. give him his chance. and he's still money if he plays his cards right.

 

[USSOCOM]

Stop freakin out, dont take this seriously and she won't either. Remember the woman looks to the man on how to act.

 

[random afc]

well, i wouldn't have taken it so seriously if we hadn't already broken up. o well, one night we agree that we're just 'taking a break', the next day at school i find out that we broke up, whatever. well, i talked to her on the phone last night, and she pissed the hell outta me so i said some things to piss her off, and she hangs up on me... twice. so then she calls me back like an hour later and professes her 'love' (well, that's what it is, but that word scares her. she just got out of a terrible 4 year on-off relationship, and it took her almost two years to get over this guy, and me being the catalyst for her to finally tell this guy to fvck off...). anyways, she calls me back and tells me that she still cares about me so much, and after a fvckin hour of holding out my feelings while she explained hers, i told her about the whole love thing, and why that screws up relationships, and how she misunderstood me and it ruined the relationship. anyways, we know we both feel so strongly for eachother, but she needs to 'figure herself out' or some shiat. well thanks people, most of this has resolved, like i know that there's alwyasa better girl out there, but it will be damn hard to find one better than this one.

so think we might get back together, but she needs to get her shiat together, and if not, then we'll still be ****buddies or something. o well, peace and thanks, btw sry for flippin out