"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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obssessed with the wrong girl

andrewsmith

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what should I do when I am obssessed with the wrong girl?

I've known this girl from college for few months, and we seat next to each other in the classes. The problem is she is always busy after class, or she needs to meet up with some people. So figured I probably should move on, but I just can't let go, because if I do I will regret and I hate that.

How should I proceed? any advice is much appreciated?
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Iceberg

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You proceed by forgetting about her, and dealing with the consequences of that.

And once you realize that there are ZERO consequences, because this woman has contributed nothing to your life, then you'll be free to obsess over the next girl who sits next to you in class.

Sorry, buddy. But there's no advice other than "just f**king do it". You're worried about regretting it? Well what is there to regret?

Telling by your obsession with a girl who you haven't dated, or had sex with, I'm going to guess that this isn't the first girl who's gotten away from you. So I'm sure this kind of "regret" is a normal part of your life.
 

The Bad Ass Canadian

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Iceberg said:
You proceed by forgetting about her, and dealing with the consequences of that.

And once you realize that there are ZERO consequences, because this woman has contributed nothing to your life, then you'll be free to obsess over the next girl who sits next to you in class.

Sorry, buddy. But there's no advice other than "just f**king do it". You're worried about regretting it? Well what is there to regret?

Telling by your obsession with a girl who you haven't dated, or had sex with, I'm going to guess that this isn't the first girl who's gotten away from you. So I'm sure this kind of "regret" is a normal part of your life.
:rockon:
 

andrewsmith

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Iceberg said:
You proceed by forgetting about her, and dealing with the consequences of that.

And once you realize that there are ZERO consequences, because this woman has contributed nothing to your life, then you'll be free to obsess over the next girl who sits next to you in class.

Sorry, buddy. But there's no advice other than "just f**king do it". You're worried about regretting it? Well what is there to regret?

Telling by your obsession with a girl who you haven't dated, or had sex with, I'm going to guess that this isn't the first girl who's gotten away from you. So I'm sure this kind of "regret" is a normal part of your life.
ok, thanks
 

The Bad Ass Canadian

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There's always another girl, dude.

Getting fixated on one woman without any sort of history (meaning multiple dates, not just one or two, and having had some sort of physical relationship with her) is idiocy, and a recipe for heartache and frustration.

The fact that she was always "busy" is a dead giveaway that she just isn't interested. If anyone were interested they'd find time or offer alternative times if they can't hangout when you wanted to.

I learned this when I was in my early 20s. Before that, I was where you are now, sometimes.

this is where the idea of plate spinning comes from. You always have options, so if one girl shows no interest you just move on to the next one, and/or meet more women. I'm not all for dating multiple women all the time, but at least knowing that a new girl could come into your life at any moment is enough to walk away from anyone.

there are tons of fish in the sea. She's just a girl.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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rosner

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andrewsmith said:
what should I do when I am obssessed with the wrong girl?

I've known this girl from college for few months, and we seat next to each other in the classes. The problem is she is always busy after class, or she needs to meet up with some people. So figured I probably should move on, but I just can't let go, because if I do I will regret and I hate that.

How should I proceed? any advice is much appreciated?
hehe..interesting one
 

PrettyBoyAJ

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Ask her out. If yes proceed. If no then forget her.

Not that hard. Either she is interested or she isnt.
 

Chickfight

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Bro, what CAN you do? Stalk her? Follow her around a hope she starts liking you? Try to be her friend and then transition into a relationship?
If any of these things seem like viable good options to you then you gotta change your mindset.

If you really want closure, then ask her out. Then she'll explicitly state she doesn't want to go out with you and you'll have it.
 
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