Naughty Ninja
Banned
I’ve read a few of the “No Contact” threads on here and see too many of you dudes obsessing and going over and over your situations like a bad habit that needs to be dropped.
What does “No contact” mean to me? It means no contact and or replies to anything sent. Phone calls, emails, IM’s, Facebook requests etc. Face to face meetings? Keep it light and do NOT get into her or your details. They want to be “just friends?” you tell them sure. We’re friends who aren’t going to communicate anymore.
Little Story for you,
I dated an ex for a little over a year. I ended it Jan 1st two years ago.
I originally met her through family and we hit it off though I’ll admit I saw red flags and had a partial CSH mentality so I rode it out. The ex’s father was non-existant in her life (a Heroin addict) and her brother was “recovering” as well. She was a social worker, and ex-bartender. I’d found out later in the relationship she was in an abusive relationship and swore she was immature at the time and it would never happen again or in our relationship. We’d always end up getting a bottle or two of wine after going out for dinner and finishing them at her place at night getting pretty drunk. (Another thing that started to turn me off. I don’t and won’t become an alcoholic.)
The first time she slapped me was at my place after my sister’s wedding. (I think she was jealous and saw anything nice as a sign of white America and having money…and she’s white herself) I was trying to leave the room to go to the bathroom. She said her “excuse” was I was acting “weird”. The “weirdness” that she was talking about was that she couldn’t get me wound up into an argument and I think it frustrated her. I told her that was the first and LAST time that would ever happen again because I never put my hands on a woman and don’t expect them to do it to me.
The second and last time it happened was on New Year’s when we got back to her friends place. Her brother’s gay and she must’ve thought I was talking about him when I was actually looking out for him and talking about some other people at the party we’d left. She was drunk, went berserk and kept hitting me. I actually felt relieved and laughed as I grabbed her arms and told her that was it. The next morning on the way home she apologized profusely and swore it would never happen again. I told her she was right… it won’t. I dropped her off at her place and NEVER CONTACTED her again. No phone calls, no text, no Facebook, no emails. Deleted her number immediately as well as no adds on facebook and cancelled her profile from “suggested friends” She sent me two emails two weeks after we’d broken up that New Years. Did I reply to them? NO. I didn’t even read or save them. I deleted them and that was that.
We haven’t spoken in over a year now. And I will NOT speak to her ever again. Keep your heads up and your pride. Don’t let ANYONE walk over you. YOU are the most important person in the relationship.
Now THAT is how you do “No Contact”.
What does “No contact” mean to me? It means no contact and or replies to anything sent. Phone calls, emails, IM’s, Facebook requests etc. Face to face meetings? Keep it light and do NOT get into her or your details. They want to be “just friends?” you tell them sure. We’re friends who aren’t going to communicate anymore.
Little Story for you,
I dated an ex for a little over a year. I ended it Jan 1st two years ago.
I originally met her through family and we hit it off though I’ll admit I saw red flags and had a partial CSH mentality so I rode it out. The ex’s father was non-existant in her life (a Heroin addict) and her brother was “recovering” as well. She was a social worker, and ex-bartender. I’d found out later in the relationship she was in an abusive relationship and swore she was immature at the time and it would never happen again or in our relationship. We’d always end up getting a bottle or two of wine after going out for dinner and finishing them at her place at night getting pretty drunk. (Another thing that started to turn me off. I don’t and won’t become an alcoholic.)
The first time she slapped me was at my place after my sister’s wedding. (I think she was jealous and saw anything nice as a sign of white America and having money…and she’s white herself) I was trying to leave the room to go to the bathroom. She said her “excuse” was I was acting “weird”. The “weirdness” that she was talking about was that she couldn’t get me wound up into an argument and I think it frustrated her. I told her that was the first and LAST time that would ever happen again because I never put my hands on a woman and don’t expect them to do it to me.
The second and last time it happened was on New Year’s when we got back to her friends place. Her brother’s gay and she must’ve thought I was talking about him when I was actually looking out for him and talking about some other people at the party we’d left. She was drunk, went berserk and kept hitting me. I actually felt relieved and laughed as I grabbed her arms and told her that was it. The next morning on the way home she apologized profusely and swore it would never happen again. I told her she was right… it won’t. I dropped her off at her place and NEVER CONTACTED her again. No phone calls, no text, no Facebook, no emails. Deleted her number immediately as well as no adds on facebook and cancelled her profile from “suggested friends” She sent me two emails two weeks after we’d broken up that New Years. Did I reply to them? NO. I didn’t even read or save them. I deleted them and that was that.
We haven’t spoken in over a year now. And I will NOT speak to her ever again. Keep your heads up and your pride. Don’t let ANYONE walk over you. YOU are the most important person in the relationship.
Now THAT is how you do “No Contact”.