Next best move with this girl?

[Scion]

This is a girl I've known for about a year. We're not friends, just acquaintances, and I've always found her attractive (apparently she thought I was attractive too when I was pursuing her friend). I never made a move on her because she was in a LTR. But now that has ended. I don't know when exactly it happened, I first heard about it from her about a month ago. I do know she's been dealing with it since then so I didn't get in her business too much, kept the contact low (contacted her once a week).

Anyway, I haven't heard from her in a little over a week and she hasn't returned my call when I contacted her on the wknd. I'm thinking of sending her a message on facebook or text asking how she's been but I don't know if it's the right move.

I should add that we've been out once when she ended it with her boyfriend and she said that she'd probably be a hermit for a while and I'd need to force her out. But the one time I've asked her to hang out since then she turned down because she was going to talk to her ex to clear things up or something. Thanks for your opinions guys.

 

[Da Realist]

First, stop spending your time trying to get just this girl. Talk to a couple others. Once women sense you have your sights set on only them, they run. Plus she's in that state right now were she is trying to clear her head somewhat.

Next, set yourself up as someone who is just trying to get her to have a little fun. Go out, stay in at her place, or bring her back to you own, just make sure sure you're fun to be around. I'm not advocating trying to do the nice guy thing where you be friends with her and hope she puts out; I'm talking about you bringing some excitement(sex) to her life. She'll try to emote, but keep it to a minimum and always try to make a physical pass at her.

So giver her another day or so, and then try calling one more time. If she answers great; if not, oh well. But keep something in mind: do not go in with a mindset she will get into a relationship with you for a long time. You will be a rebound, so keep your prospects open. Your goal should be to just get some and whatever happens after that is on her.

 

[thecurtainfalls]

Next, set yourself up as someone who is just trying to get her to have a little fun. Go out, stay in at her place, or bring her back to you own, just make sure sure you're fun to be around. I'm not advocating trying to do the nice guy thing where you be friends with her and hope she puts out; I'm talking about you bringing some excitement(sex) to her life. She'll try to emote, but keep it to a minimum and always try to make a physical pass at her.

This is basically what I was about to suggest. Great post, Da Realist.

Scion - remember this: you have nothing to gain by "orbiting" and wasting time with this girl. Make a move, press your luck, and act accordingly. You win regardless of her reaction, remember that. You win because a) you tried and b) you'll know exactly where you stand and won't have to worry about what the situation is.

Never try to figure out what a girl thinks of you. It's like trying to solve a Zen quandary. Assume she's interested and default to action, action, action.

Also go to the Don Juan Tips section ASAP and read squirrel's post "Don't wait for a sign of interest". Read it now. Good luck.

 

[Scion]

This is basically what I was about to suggest. Great post, Da Realist.

Scion - remember this: you have nothing to gain by "orbiting" and wasting time with this girl. Make a move, press your luck, and act accordingly. You win regardless of her reaction, remember that. You win because a) you tried and b) you'll know exactly where you stand and won't have to worry about what the situation is.

Never try to figure out what a girl thinks of you. It's like trying to solve a Zen quandary. Assume she's interested and default to action, action, action.

Also go to the Don Juan Tips section ASAP and read squirrel's post "Don't wait for a sign of interest". Read it now. Good luck.

I was planning to do what Da Realist advised from the start. I was more asking as to whether or not I contact her again.

I'm not trying to figure out if she likes me. I think she does, she thought highly of me when I pursued her friend (her friend didn't think so though), and the couple times I've chilled with her I thought I detected some interest, maybe.

I'll take a look at that post you recommended.

 

[Scion]

Well sent her one last message, basically said I wanted to hang out with her next week (I got too much **** going on this wknd). Then proceeded to delete her number, just in case I got the urge to drunk dial her in the future, lol.