trickynick
Master Don Juan
It seems like a lot of the talk about negging on this board focuses on canned "neg hits". When asked what negs are all about we often hear phrases such as "bring down the b*tch shield" or "knock her off her pedastal". While these ARE objectives of negging there is one that is much more important that CANNOT be forgotten: to DISARM.
When you neg a woman the objective is to disarm her so that you can talk to her positively. Often times people who are inexperienced with negs and don't fully understand their purpose (like me at one time) will use what they THINK has the effect of a neg to demonstrate to themselves and to the woman that they have no fear of showing cleverness at her expense. While this is admittedly hilarious fun, it does not serve a very useful purpose if you want to succeed with this woman.
Here is something that happened today which is an example of how I manufactured a neg effect out of a situation on the fly:
I was in a deparment store looking for a beard trimmer. I went over by the hair clippers and curling irons where I figured they may be. After a couple minutes of fruitless searching a girl (8) appears.
HER: Can I help you find something.
ME: In fact you can, I am looking for a beard trimmer.
HER: Hmmmm...
ME: To be honest I am pretty new to whole beard thing so any guidance would be much appreciated.
HER: Come with me. <start to follow her>...so did you just start growing that not long ago (my goatee)?
ME: How old do you think it is?
HER: Well my boyfriend (DAMMIT
) had his about that long after about two weeks.
ME: That's right on, very observant.
We come to a case with beard trimmers and razor blades and it is locked.
ME: Why is this locked?
HER: I have no idea (laughing).
Me: Well it is understandable considering beard trimmers are the most heavily stolen item nationwide.
HER: Really? (she believes it, what a blonde
)
ME: Oh god yes! Did you see the CNN feature on it the other night.
HER: No I didn't! (she still genuinely believed me)
At this point I knew the girl was not too quick. I said mattter of factly, "I am kidding" and then laughed in such a way that from her perspective it would have been hard to tell if I was laughing at her expense or I was laughing at the situation and/or my own joke about it. I moved quickly on to continued positive conversation.
She was disarmed at this point because it was obviously not my intent to slam her, but I was still interested in talking to her when her flaw (not being too bright) became apparent. She was probably thinking, "Gee he's on to me. He KNOWS I am not the sharpest knife in the drawer after what just happened but he still thinks I am okay to talk to." She is thereby disarmed.
Later on I walked by her on the way out and showed her the trimmers saying "you better make sure I pay for these!" and she laughed. I did not get her number because I knew she had a borefriend and I wasn't in the mood to work my way around that obstacle at the moment (call me a puzzy and flame me, I am always welcoming of that).
You see what happened here? I connected with a REAL flaw of hers and made her aware that I knew of it in a subtle way without slamming her. A lot of the canned neg hits point out a superimposed flaw that happens to fit into a witty comment the user wants to use. Don't let your need to use a particular neg hit or neg hits in general supercede situational appropriateness. Don't get me wrong, I do use canned negs a lot but they have to be well transitioned.
Last month I used the nail neg after first taking an interest in the girl's watch.
ME: Is that a Movado?
HER: Yes.
I take her hand, KINO her hand while checking out her watch and commenting on it then slide my hand down her fingers.
ME: Are your nails real?
HER: NO.
ME: Oh...well they still LOOK nice.
So remember: Negs, whether they be canned or improvised situationally, must be focus on DISARMING the girl. Be careful not to create obstacles in your efforts to surrmount them.
Nick
------------------
You either own the game or it owns you!
[This message has been edited by trickynick (edited 06-20-2002).]
When you neg a woman the objective is to disarm her so that you can talk to her positively. Often times people who are inexperienced with negs and don't fully understand their purpose (like me at one time) will use what they THINK has the effect of a neg to demonstrate to themselves and to the woman that they have no fear of showing cleverness at her expense. While this is admittedly hilarious fun, it does not serve a very useful purpose if you want to succeed with this woman.
Here is something that happened today which is an example of how I manufactured a neg effect out of a situation on the fly:
I was in a deparment store looking for a beard trimmer. I went over by the hair clippers and curling irons where I figured they may be. After a couple minutes of fruitless searching a girl (8) appears.
HER: Can I help you find something.
ME: In fact you can, I am looking for a beard trimmer.
HER: Hmmmm...
ME: To be honest I am pretty new to whole beard thing so any guidance would be much appreciated.
HER: Come with me. <start to follow her>...so did you just start growing that not long ago (my goatee)?
ME: How old do you think it is?
HER: Well my boyfriend (DAMMIT
ME: That's right on, very observant.
We come to a case with beard trimmers and razor blades and it is locked.
ME: Why is this locked?
HER: I have no idea (laughing).
Me: Well it is understandable considering beard trimmers are the most heavily stolen item nationwide.
HER: Really? (she believes it, what a blonde
ME: Oh god yes! Did you see the CNN feature on it the other night.
HER: No I didn't! (she still genuinely believed me)
At this point I knew the girl was not too quick. I said mattter of factly, "I am kidding" and then laughed in such a way that from her perspective it would have been hard to tell if I was laughing at her expense or I was laughing at the situation and/or my own joke about it. I moved quickly on to continued positive conversation.
She was disarmed at this point because it was obviously not my intent to slam her, but I was still interested in talking to her when her flaw (not being too bright) became apparent. She was probably thinking, "Gee he's on to me. He KNOWS I am not the sharpest knife in the drawer after what just happened but he still thinks I am okay to talk to." She is thereby disarmed.
Later on I walked by her on the way out and showed her the trimmers saying "you better make sure I pay for these!" and she laughed. I did not get her number because I knew she had a borefriend and I wasn't in the mood to work my way around that obstacle at the moment (call me a puzzy and flame me, I am always welcoming of that).
You see what happened here? I connected with a REAL flaw of hers and made her aware that I knew of it in a subtle way without slamming her. A lot of the canned neg hits point out a superimposed flaw that happens to fit into a witty comment the user wants to use. Don't let your need to use a particular neg hit or neg hits in general supercede situational appropriateness. Don't get me wrong, I do use canned negs a lot but they have to be well transitioned.
Last month I used the nail neg after first taking an interest in the girl's watch.
ME: Is that a Movado?
HER: Yes.
I take her hand, KINO her hand while checking out her watch and commenting on it then slide my hand down her fingers.
ME: Are your nails real?
HER: NO.
ME: Oh...well they still LOOK nice.
So remember: Negs, whether they be canned or improvised situationally, must be focus on DISARMING the girl. Be careful not to create obstacles in your efforts to surrmount them.
Nick
------------------
You either own the game or it owns you!
[This message has been edited by trickynick (edited 06-20-2002).]
