Actionmatt0z
New Member
- Joined
- Jul 5, 2011
- Messages
- 2
- Reaction score
- 0
I have a really awkward situation, that I need some help with. Not sure if this forum is the place for it, but I figured I would give it a shot.
Im 28, my ex-girlfriend is 26. We met, suddenly, at the end of our previous relationships. She started off really awesome, a great girl, cool to hang out with fun. And then we slept together after a few weeks of spending time together. She got preg. first time go. She was not taking birth control regularly or properly and I had been spoiled by a woman who was taking it to the T.
I moved in right away and we started trying to make a relationship work. This continued throughout her pregnancy while I was fininishing my undergrad degree, and coaching. After our child was born, I started a masters program and then deployed. There was not alot of trust in the relationship because I always felt I was there for my daughter and not for her mother. We would have really bad fights. The fights were from one thing.
Since I was 16, I was addicted to sexting. Getting girls to send me dirty pictures, and I was good at it. I could tell any woman what she wanted to hear enough to get photos from her. It was my way of not "settling". She found them all the time, and I promised I would never do it again, over and over. I left a few times, always keeping 50% of my daughter, but the gf would always persue and harass until I came back. Finally a few months ago, we split for the last time, and I got a month to figure stuff out.
I started to see her in a different light and was finally really ready to get serious. I told her about this, and she said no. She became really angry and agressive when I would drop off and pick up my daughter. Was always super rude to me. After a month, I told her that I wanted to start seeing her and having her around. After she told me no, I finally sought the help I needed. I went to a counselor and to church and started relying on the advice of friends. After a month of this, she heard about what I was doing ( I remain close with her family), and they told her.. and she started coming around. She came to church for 3 weeks, I did stuff for her on Easter and Mothers Day, we spent time together in may... and then in june, she started getting really angry and agressive with me again. She had said, that we were hanging out too much, shes really confused, does not know what she wants, was not saying yes, was not saying no...
She asked me to switch some days with her a few times, with regard to our daughter and I helped her out. . then once I said no, and she flipped out. Said we will never be together, that she hates me and always will. That we never were and never will be a family. I've been trying to remain level headed and taking everything in stride, not lashing out or being a jerk. But things are bad... I need some help, what am I supposed to do? I want to be a family, and I know I have my stuff together and I am ready... please someone help.
Shes also told me on several occasions that shes not seeing anyone else. And we made a deal that if we were, for the sake of our daughter we would tell the other person... but I just have a feeling she might be. Her facebook doesnt have any guys posting on her page, and all the pics that she adds are with friends of ours (girls).... so I just dont know. Is there any hope she'll see that Im better and come back? How else can I show her that I mean what I say, because I really do.
Im 28, my ex-girlfriend is 26. We met, suddenly, at the end of our previous relationships. She started off really awesome, a great girl, cool to hang out with fun. And then we slept together after a few weeks of spending time together. She got preg. first time go. She was not taking birth control regularly or properly and I had been spoiled by a woman who was taking it to the T.
I moved in right away and we started trying to make a relationship work. This continued throughout her pregnancy while I was fininishing my undergrad degree, and coaching. After our child was born, I started a masters program and then deployed. There was not alot of trust in the relationship because I always felt I was there for my daughter and not for her mother. We would have really bad fights. The fights were from one thing.
Since I was 16, I was addicted to sexting. Getting girls to send me dirty pictures, and I was good at it. I could tell any woman what she wanted to hear enough to get photos from her. It was my way of not "settling". She found them all the time, and I promised I would never do it again, over and over. I left a few times, always keeping 50% of my daughter, but the gf would always persue and harass until I came back. Finally a few months ago, we split for the last time, and I got a month to figure stuff out.
I started to see her in a different light and was finally really ready to get serious. I told her about this, and she said no. She became really angry and agressive when I would drop off and pick up my daughter. Was always super rude to me. After a month, I told her that I wanted to start seeing her and having her around. After she told me no, I finally sought the help I needed. I went to a counselor and to church and started relying on the advice of friends. After a month of this, she heard about what I was doing ( I remain close with her family), and they told her.. and she started coming around. She came to church for 3 weeks, I did stuff for her on Easter and Mothers Day, we spent time together in may... and then in june, she started getting really angry and agressive with me again. She had said, that we were hanging out too much, shes really confused, does not know what she wants, was not saying yes, was not saying no...
She asked me to switch some days with her a few times, with regard to our daughter and I helped her out. . then once I said no, and she flipped out. Said we will never be together, that she hates me and always will. That we never were and never will be a family. I've been trying to remain level headed and taking everything in stride, not lashing out or being a jerk. But things are bad... I need some help, what am I supposed to do? I want to be a family, and I know I have my stuff together and I am ready... please someone help.
Shes also told me on several occasions that shes not seeing anyone else. And we made a deal that if we were, for the sake of our daughter we would tell the other person... but I just have a feeling she might be. Her facebook doesnt have any guys posting on her page, and all the pics that she adds are with friends of ours (girls).... so I just dont know. Is there any hope she'll see that Im better and come back? How else can I show her that I mean what I say, because I really do.