Need some help..

[Manonamission]

Hey guys,

Long time reader of the boards first time poster.

I've studied the DJ Bible, and have put most of it into practice. Anyway got with a girl two summers ago, dated for a year and a half. She showed a lot of signs of anti-personality disorder, which is a really ****ed up mental disorder where a woman craves attention from men, and will do some really ****ed up ****. There are whole threads about it on the boards....anyway that's besides the point.

I broke up with her because she cheated on me, even though I broke it off I took it pretty hard. I went away to college, messed around with two chicks that came on to me, and then decided I needed to focus more on my studies in college since I only got a 2.9 first semester. Second semester I got a 3.5, and now I am back home. (I go to school on the opposite side of the country)

Today I walked around my local mall and attempted to try some cold approaches (don't ask me why, but these are what I prefer) Even though I didn't see anything better than a 6.0 on the hotness scale, something in the back of my mind tells me I wouldn't have had the balls to approach like I used to.

I need some help removing that self doubt from my head, I really think the relationship with my ex-g/f has ****ed me up to a point where I just don't have the balls to cold approach, either that or its just been so long that I'm doubting my own self-confidence.

I dont know, maybe I'm just talking out of my ass, I've re-read the Bible, that always helps a little but in the long run it doesnt have the same impact. I'm really going through a struggle right now.

If anyone maybe knows what the **** is wrong with my thought process, or just has any feedback on what my problem is, I'd like to hear it.

Thanks.

 

[Manonamission]

anyone?

 

[El MonoLoco]

Patience man Patience


Just give it some time and it will click....kinda like riding a bike

Just do what your doing and try to get her out of your head...


Sarge on!!!

:rockon:

 

[MVP]

Here is the answer: You need to believe in yourself. You need faith that you will get what you want as long as you are willing to work on your inner self and go for it by taking action. It is a self-esteem issue so just believe in yourself. Visualize being calm and confident; just go out and have fun. =)

 

[KontrollerX]

Ugh if you dated a chick with Anti Social Personality Disorder well let me tell you that is the absolute worst person you could possibly date out of the people with a Cluster B Personality Disorder.

An ASPD female I wouldn't imagine to be an AW no.

The ASPD's primary focus is ridding themselves of their intense boredom since they don't have any emotions like we do to give themselves comfort. Unlike borderlines and histrionics in their cluster they consciously know the bad things they are doing to you and they often play with people's lives and emotions just to see if they can destroy that person. Everything is a game to an ASPD. They are the perfect human predator. If she acted like she craved attention it was just that an act because she believed she read something in your personality that would like a girl that does that. An ASPD doesn't crave attention like a histrionic or a narcissist would but they do enjoy human contact.

If your ex really had this particular disorder likely she drew you in by becoming your ideal woman like the other girls in Cluster B would do but not only that as an ASPD and what seperated her from the rest of the cluster b pack you probably saw her do a ton of drugs and get into a ton of fights with other chicks and she just came off as a super cool badass chick to you with an I don't give a fvck attitude.

Anyway all of Cluster B have been described to therapists by their victims as soul stealers and by some therapists as emotional vampires because when you are discarded by one of these or you yourself end the relationship you feel a lot more taken out of you than you would if a relationship ended with a healthy minded girl. It seems no one is quite sure why this is but I believe your ex has had this effect on you and hence your current lack of confidence.

Its also been said by many people that after a relationship with one of these girls a guy tends to pick up her negative traits for a while or a lifetime unless he actively fights them off so keep that in mind too.

In closing I guess if you can't get your stride back from the DJ's advice and keep feeling f'ed up a round of professional counseling may not be out of the question. After being victimized by a Cluster B its almost impossible to avoid doing that to get your head right again.

Good luck!