Need serious help!!!!!

[je4148]

This is going to be a long one guys. Get ready for a hell of a story.

Ok, I'm 37 she's 31. We are both married with kids. We work together and have for about 8 years. First time I told her I liked her was about 6 years ago. She was already in a relationship with someone else (not with husband). We talked, but I missed my chance. We talked on and off but that's it for a few years. Decide to try again, and dammit if she isn't sleeping with someone else again. Continue to talk. Then one day she invites me over to her house, husband is at work, we kiss a little and that's it. This goes on for a while, but nothing sexual. I buy her stuff. Then we get caught. Talk for a while, then I find out I'm only around to make other guy jealous. We stop talking for a while. She is still friends with second guy and admits she was in love/obsessed with him. So, after another year I decide to try again, and all she will let me do is kiss, rub her boobs and that's it. Says she doesn't want anything like she had before ever again. BTW, she got caught every time. Husband hasn't left her, but doesn't trust her. Anyway, we email only. See each other every other Monday night for about 20 min of making out. We don't want people to know we talk. I did go overboard. I told her I wanted to have sex, bugged her about it. Told her I want her to love me like she did the second guy. She didn't like that cause I kinda bugged her. We email alllllll the time. I can't ignore her for some reason. I really like her a lot. Anyway, we've argued for about a week cause I kept bugging her about same thing over and over. Then I'd threaten to leave, then crawl back and over and over. Ask why I can't have the same chance as the other guys, and so on. She doesn't want anything that physical anymore she says, but she loves kissing. She's not going to meet except on Mondays and won't make a lie to meet any other time. I've bought her a lot of stuff. Talking Burberry purses, clothes, etc. she's a little annoyed right now. What should I do to get her chasing me and want to do more? Just be patient, and wait? Give up, don't really want to do that. Just kiss and enjoy and hope more happens. Ignore her a little? We aren't allowed to talk after 5 pm now. That's when hubby gets home. It wasn't like that till I pissed her off. She has given me one las chance. Alrighty, let's hear thoughts.

 

[expos]

Trolling?

Someone needs to set you straight.

Work on your marriage or leave your wife now. In fact, I'd tell your wife to leave you because your behavior is pretty terrible for a grown man. Imagine your wife wanting to bang some dude she worked with, or if she made out with some guy and got away with it? How would that feel to you?

Also, this married woman that you have all of this drama with...Why? Why do you even care? She sounds like a ***** - and married one at that. Drop her and get your act together.

 

[je4148]

No, not trolling.

I was just asking for opinions. I'm sorry if you don't like what I'm doing. I understand your point, really, but that wasn't what I asked.

 

[logicallefty]

OP, I try to respond positively when I can as do many guys here, but you aren't likely to get much support here when you are a cheater yourself. Now if a woman is cheating on you you have came to the right place, but a cheating man isn't all that well taken in our community.

THAT being said, let me pretend like you are single and she is single, and answer what I think you are wanting to know. My answer would be ignore her, go date other women/spin other plates, and wait for her to chase you. If she doesn't, forget she exists and move on.

 

[salinechow]

This is literally worse case scenario. You are a puppet.

You have LITERALLY no control over the situation and virtually no self-control at all.

This is the smallest demonstration of MAN I could imagine. This situation goes against every principal of manliness and anything even remotely resembling a healthy relationship.

You must disengage this person at ALL COSTS. Not as a ploy either. This is so extremely toxic I think it warrants extreme behavior. Like transfer work locations and move or something if necessary.


This is like a bad drug habit. You must rip off the bandaid and quick. NEVER SEE OR SPEAK TO this person ever again. It is your only chance at romantic happiness.

If you are hell bent on pursuing self-destruction and continuing to mock anything resembling being a stand up MAN or anything resembling a healthy romantic pursuit, I am afraid you have come to the wrong sphere of the internet.

 

[Betterz]

This just made me sick. Why be married if you want to **** other people. I've never been married and im 34, when I do marry I plan to be faithful.

 

[sylvester the cat]

As absurd as it is she probably wants nothing to do with a man who can cheat on his wife. Guaranteed she will think if he can do that to his own wife then he'd have no qualms doing that to me. This is also what you should be thinking but it seems your own selfish desire is overriding your logic and reason.

No doubt this woman is very attractive to you because you cannot have her. Realise this now and you might be able to save yourself. continue to pursue this and you will find yourself and others around you in a world of hurt.