Need Serious Advice

[Obzen]

Here's my problem.

Ten years ago I knew a girl and we totally hit it off, her name is Madaleine. We spent two weeks together in Warsaw together (it's where we met) and we pretty much had the time of lives together for those two weeks. It was remarkable. We lost contact after I got back to the states - honestly, I've had a couple relationships since then so I dropped it with Madaleine without reason and I never told her about my other flings. We just 'stopped' talking. Well, she eventually got married and had a couple of kids, I got married too and I have a young son. Now, I'm divorced (single dad with full custody of my son) and Madaleine, well, she been over to my grandma's house in Warsaw with her two kids a couple of times to ask about me. She's even been over just to look at my pictures.
Recently I've given grandma my email address for her to pass it on to Madaleine -- my grandma instead gives my email to Madaleine's aunt... the aunt says she won't pass it on because Madaleine is married. Keep in my that Madaleine's aunt introduced me to her. My grandma on the other hand is convinced that Madaleine is in a terrible relationship and longs for me.

So, what do I do?

Should I forfeit my interest in Madaleine and accept what we once had as a good memory, perhaps keep with the sanctity of her union with her husband and let it go.. and keep the happiness of her children..

or

Should I fly out to Warsaw and pursue in asking her if she's happy where she's at? Maybe try to get her back?

Am I wrong to think that I don't believe our love for each other has went away and that her marriage and children are just an obstacle to my needs?

Are my ambitions unreasonable, am I being foolish?

 

[Greasy Pig]

I think if she was really keen for you, she would've found a way to get in touch. Flying to Poland on a whim seems pretty pointless without concrete proof.

 

[bmp2cpm]

Not worth it. 1) She's married 2) Has children 3) Long distance relationships are difficult under optimal conditions.

Also, women tend to look around. Don't make more out her asking about you than it is.

You only spent 2 weeks together 10 years ago? Doesn't sound like adequate vetting time to me. Maybe that's why you feel this way, you never saw all the disadvantages to being with her.

Vet your women and don't settle.

 

[Tictac]

Doing married women is for beta losers.

 

[SecondHalf]

Relationships are difficult enough when circumstances are ideal.
This is very far from ideal.

If you pay attention to your rational self, you already know what to do.
You're not thinking rational right now. You want to relive a dream you once had and feel larger than life in the process. Except, the conditions have changed. You both have serious baggage. The terms of engagement are different too (you are daydreaming about that fictional word ... Forever).

Three will get hurt here: your son, you and your bank account.

Ps: I'm not just talking out of my a55, I'm also a single full time father.

Pay attention to your son and find a local, convenient companion. Trust me, single fathers are very much sought out. You won't be alone long.

SH

 

[Warrior74]

Dude. She's married. Leave it. Let me guess, you have no plates right now right? Sitting around reminiscing over better days? Guess what you need to do?