Need quick advice

[The Bartender]

Ok so been dating this girl for a few months now. I was one of the reasons she broke up with her ltbf (6.5yrs). Sometimes I get the feeling they are trying to work stuff out, they have mutual friends so I dont really question that they are at the same place sometimes.

Recently: they went to a play together (his parents bought him tickets)...this was a group setting. Also, get this, he proposed to her last week. She said no, but cmon, wtf am i supposed to think. Read one of her txt msgs to him, said something about hanging out over the holiday weekend while she is back home.

Sh!t's been on my mind for a bit, havent confronted her on how i think they are trying to get back but...what d'yall think? How should I go about bringing this up?

BTW - I am going to a movie with a different chick tonight to prevent one-itis rearing its ugly head at me.

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

Originally posted by The Bartender
BTW - I am going to a movie with a different chick tonight to prevent one-itis rearing its ugly head at me.

Good call! I don't know why you are even bothering with that chick. This sounds like it is just going to cause a lot of stupid drama for you. I think you should break up with her and tell her to come back to you when she has made up her about about her ex. It is quite obvious that something is going on. This is unacceptable.

 

[The Bartender]

Ok thought it out over the past hour while searching some stuff on here:

These thoughts I am having are lowing my confidence, so fvck that. I will not think about it. I have no evidence that she's getting back with him. I think a good way to approach this is to ask her where she wants this to go. She's asked me this before and I beat it around the bush like usual. Everything right now with here is pure suspicion so i dont want to come out blazing saddles and accusing her of anything. Great chick and wouldnt want to ruin it if i were wrong. I'll probably throw into the conversation that I really dont like her hanging out with him.

 

[TedJustAdmitIt]

Quick question mate.....did she cheat on her ex with you?

Sounds like you're taking the right approach re:sniffing around other ladies

 

[The Bartender]

Originally posted by Ted,JustAdmitIt
Quick question mate.....did she cheat on her ex with you?

Yep

 

[NRM]

Comeon man, you sound like a smart guy, you should know what to do.

She's obviously is NOT respecting you. Imagine, a woman proposing to you, and you still chilling with her with your girlfriend's knowledge. You'd get your testicles cut off the thirty seconds you got home and the first 15 was just the bitching you out.

Just friends? Yeah right, we both know the other guy is feeling her.

But here's one on your side. Your woman is just being the typical woman. The typical attention-whore dogging woman. I'm not saying she's bad or that she's a bad girl or anything, I'm sure you'd have good enough tastes to avoid that. It's just that she doesn't see anything wrong because she's a girl and girls are used to this whole "JUST FRIENDS" idea and many men are not.

She should NOT have an EX anywhere on her schedule if she's REALLY with you. Understand that and embed it well. If you really mean more to her than this ghetto ex-boyfriend, than she really shouldn't have to choose at all. If she had more fun with you than with him, what the hell is she doing hanging out with him if she could be with you chilling?

Honestly, I don't think your girl is a bad girl, she's just being a typical one. Set her straight, tell her straight up, don't ask her questions about what SHE WANTS TO DO. DO what YOU want to DO.

You can either break up with her, or tell her straight up. She's leading him on if anything, I mean, GOD DAMN, he proposed to her, he's misreading signals that your girlfriend is giving up to him. If she's trying to get back with him, LET HER, but you get the fuck out as well. But if she really is loyal to you, and she's just doing the "JUST FRIENDS" thing for his benefit, you need to set her straight and let her know you don't like it. It can be as simple as,

"You know, I don't like that you're still seeing your ex now that we're together. And if he proposed to you, I think he's getting mixed signals."

And hand her an ultimatium. That's just a simple way, it shows some flaws, but it'll give you results, and they are the desperate ones you need to make your decision on whether to stay or leave her on the street.

 

[The Bartender]

NRM - thanks for the eye opener. Sometimes I need help getting my head out of my ass. I'll post a follow up soon.

 

[TedJustAdmitIt]

If she cheated with then she'll cheat on you mate

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

Yeah, she was his hor and she is both of your hors now!!! She is sexing him - don't be a fool!!!

Say "No" to getting emotional with hos!!!!!

 

[The Bartender]

I went to the movie...feel a lot better. I think I was overanalyzing sh!t before. I mighta had a case of cabin fever from studying too much.

I will still be bringing up this issue with her.

 

[MindOverMatter]

1.) you hung out with her when she had a man, and she cheated on her boyfriend with you.

2.) you are her boyfriend now.

3.) she is hanging out with her ex.

4.)

 

[djbr]

Originally posted by MindOverMatter
1.) you hung out with her when she had a man, and she cheated on her boyfriend with you.

2.) you are her boyfriend now.

3.) she is hanging out with her ex.

4.)

4) so WTF do you THINK is going on?
5) What are you going to do about it?

Hehehe... dudes, please. Don't cling so hard to one chick. If you don't have what it takes to be confortable in your own skin when you're single, work on it. If you don't, you WILL BE played and used.

 

[The Bartender]

I hear ya guys, I am not going to just assume tho, I'll clear it all up.

 

[jprjrjr]

Originally posted by Ted,JustAdmitIt
If she cheated with then she'll cheat on you mate

This is what I've been saying all along. Some of you bozos who think you're being cool by picking up on another guy's girl just don't understand; IF SHE CHEATED ON HIM WITH YOU, SHE'LL CHEAT ON YOU WITH SOMEONE ELSE!!!!!!!


Why is that such a hard concept to grasp? You think you're such a major stud that'll you'll cure her of her horing ways?

Any girl that cheats on a guy can't be trusted with you, or anyone else.

 

[The Bartender]

Cleared things up with her today. She said she'd stop talking to him. So I think it went well.