My story - need help :]

[cA^]

Basically this girl moved about 5mins drive away from me (I live rural, 30mins from major town of 20,000ppl), she goes to my college and she is in the same year as me (11). So after a few days I introduced myself to her, (I know some of her friends, all of them now...) and just started chatting, and since then i've talked to her every day and we also sit next to eachother on the bus every morning and afternoon when she's on :-] We have had some conversations on msn messenger before, last Sunday was pretty big; she is still 'friends' with her ex-bf, and I made it clear that I dont really like that idea, and I think she realised, however she went and had tea at his house about 2 weeks ago, and I learned tonight that he is over at her house. She clames that she doesnt want to go out with him again, and that they are just 'good friends', is this something within itslef?

I asked her if she had any deeper feelings for him and she said no. Anywho I chat to her friends about her (some of them are in my classes) as I know they will tell her anything I say about her, they ask me if im going to ask her out etc. I say i'm not sure if the time is right etc. but what happened today i'm pretty sure i've got a good shot.
We were chatting on the college email, then she said 'Cheer me up, im having a bad day", so I sent 1 back saying "I will on the bus tonight" ( I planned to ask her out on the bus ) and she replyed with a ''. Anywho she msgd me saying she was getting picked up, so I felt kinda **** and just msgd her with a 'Oh '
Anyway she was waiting for me outside my locker at the end of the day, and we started talking then I asked what she was doing on the 3 day break which starts tomorrow (study time for mid years), and she said 'nothing', then we continued chatting and then she asked me if I wanted to go to the movies with her on Friday. I said sure, hehe was an awesome moment for me, I can feel that we are _almost_ going out, just not quite!
So we are going to catch a movie this Friday, afterwards I was thinking of just getting some lunch, going somewhere nice and asking her out.
What do you guys think?
I've planned to ask her out in the last few days but the time just wasnt right I guess, however I belive her asking me to the movies is a sure sign that something might happen?

I guess what im asking is how do I act at the movies, I mean if she doesnt do anything at the start, should I make the move ie. arm around her neck etc. Is it wise asking her out in the movies or wait until after it's finished and we're eating lunch somewhere?

Sorry about all the info, I feel abit better now that i've typed it out as I have been reading these forums for about a week now and felt I would like your guys advice with my situation

Thanks in advance

 

[gravstar]

Yeah, go for it. She has expressed interest in you. You should make everything a little less akward while your trying to crack on to her with C&F.

If your able to get physical that's when you ask her out. Although I would do it while your having lunch, not at the movies. Post back how it goes mate.

 

[cA^]

Thanks for the advice champ, I guess the thing i'm not sure about is her and her ex-bf.

Is it just me or he being over at her house while they're not going out abit She told me on msn that he was there tonight aswell :| yet she looked me in the eyes and told me the other day that she isnt doing anything with him, and has told me on messenger that she doesnt want to go back out with him.

Just abit confused about the 'ex' factor I guess is this normal ?

gravstar, I see you're from oz Same here

 

[cA^]

Update:

She txt me last night saying that her and her ex had a big talk about where they stand, and "I guess i wont be seeing him anymore".

woop woop ~ good news for me she also hinted she needs some time about it all, which is understandable, so I might not ask her out at the movies, maybe the week after that

What you guys think?

 

[08aisaac]

From the first post and the rest of your posts I have calculated that you are in fact still pretty AFC. You are playing it cool, but being the one she goes to about her bf, it sounds like your are on the way to being a good friend of hers. What do you care if her bf is coming over to her house.

You definitely need to read some of the bible. But trust your instinct because that's what I would do. I used to sit on the bus with this girl who was alot like me and we liked each other pretty well but she had a bf. He had an awesome car and was alot older. Who knows.

 

[cA^]

I dunno if im just a good friend of hers.

She was the one who asked me to the movies in 2 days time, and she txt me saying her ex and her had a big talk about where they stand, and that she wont be seeing him anymore.

So from that I belive that she might want something more than a realtionship after all?

I dont mind reading peoples storys on here, and it's good to get confidence up, but as you say, I like to trust my instincs alot

Btw, what's an 'AFC'? (Yes i'm new around here~)

 

[08aisaac]

An AFC is an average frustrated chump. It doesn't sound like you are too bad but maybe if you read the bible, which is located at the top of this page, you can become a real prize. There are alot of methods to becoming a DJ but once yu are a DJ you will realize it.

What is this girl like. Describe her to me. Is she like the really nice girl or naughty or the girl next door or what. Is she an introvert or an extrovert? What does she look like?

No I am not asking you this so that I can jack off, but rather so I can fully grasp the situation and give you advice based on past situations that I have been in.

 

[gravstar]

Hey mate, don't even think about her boyfriend, he's long gone. You should get it into your mind that you are now superior to him, kick those confidence levels up.

I agree with 08aisaac, read up on the bible, hammer that stuff into your brain until it becomes natural.

But then again you come from Oztralia so what can go wrong?
And what's the town that you live close to?

 

[cA^]

Thx for the replys


I'll be honest, I didn't really go after her because of her looks, it was more a thing that something might happen if I have a crack, and it's also a bonus that she lives just 5mins away from me.
She is doing 3 pretertiary subjects (3 exam subjects), so she isnt one of those girls that just do sport etc. She has brains and looks.
She is genuinly nice to me, thats another reason why I like her. She won't despise me because I live out on a small farm (unlike this ***** I was getting close to earlier in the year ), so she likes me for who I am.
She likes it when I joke about with her, the other day we were telling eachother stories about childhood memories etc. anyway I told a funny one about a rooster that chased me and attacked me (jazzed it up of course ) and you know how girls give you that playful hit on the arm when they're laughing? hehe well she did that. So I think she's pretty into me, espically after she told me that she wont be seeing her ex again (doesnt want to go out with him), so i'm taking that as another sign that she wants to get closer to me and eventually go out with me?

She looks very pretty, i'd give her an 7.8 / 10 easy. She is a quite girl, when she is with her friends, some of them are louder than her, she is bascially the same, which I like in a girl

This friday instead of going into town and catching a movie as we planned, we cant get a lift in there, so I offered if she wanted to come around to my place, and she said 'for sure, just got to check with my parents when they get home'. So i'll ask her tomorrow I guess if she says yes, then i'm on a winner (I think!)

Hope the info helps guys, thanks alot for the advice already

Ps. Gravstar : Devonport, TAS

 

[08aisaac]

sounds like you have a great girl and the techniques on this site don't really applie for this kind of situation

 

[dannowillbookem]

^^^yeah ur gonna want to apply c&f SPARINGLY. she sounds like she might be falling for u but u have to make sure the exbf is gone (tell her u dont share girls if she still persists) and u have to make sure u dont become a girlfriend. u need to show her u have a life other than her and be confident yet friendly.

sounds like a nice girl so avoid being an a$shole with the c&f.

 

[gravstar]

Awwww. Anything but Tassy mate.

 

[cA^]

:'(

 

[cA^]

hmm i feel like sh!t right now :'(

so everything has been going ok, we chat on msn most nights, i will see her at school\bus as of monday onwards, she sends me nice txt msgs and stuff with 'luv ... xox' etc. and now i've just gotten back from a long run, and i come on msn to find that her ex bf is at her house, using her msn account :'( and as i said before, she told me that they talked and decided not to see eachother again. and another thing, this fckwit has the nerve to add me to his msn list.
now as ive said above, she told me that they talked and are just friends, but this prick goes over to her dads house (where she is for the weekend) and starts talking to me on msn?
this girl knows that i dont like her bf hanging about with her if we are to get serious, yet this happens D:?

ps. the reason i know it is him is because he added me to msn a few days ago, and we talked earlier today (he did most of the talking), asked me what i did today, i said played golf, so he knew that and said that on this girls account, so i know its him :|

this girl means alot to me, i wouldnt be suprised if she comes on later or txt me saying something about how they are just friends and all, but if she doesnt :[?

she means alot to me, id really like to start dating her etc. but i feel like complete **** right now after getting back and reading that :|

plz help a brother out here

 

[October]

My opinion:

You are a little desperate. But then again, nearly everyone here is. You are looking into everything a little too much. Maybe you are excited, maybe you don't have experience, I don't know.

And it seems like you are competing with her ex. Have you ever seen how she acts around her ex? I don't know what to tell you...but remember...WORDS DON'T MEAN ****. LOOK AT HER ACTIONS. But that doesn't mean to get pissed at the ex or confront him or anything like that. Work on your own game, don't worry about competition. Remember...jealousy is insecure.

And in the first post, you said you were going to the movies...and asking her out? I don't get it.

My advice: It isn't the end of the world if you get shut down. You MUST realize that.

You need to learn a little more if you want to get better. Read the bible, read the high school bible, read Weapons of Mass Seduction, and all of that. Make yourself a better person, and your game WILL get better.

Are you confident in yourself? Answer TRUTHFULLY. Just a thought.

You also need to focus on having FUN with her. Do NOT focus on getting her to like you. If you have fun with her, she will like you.

 

[cA^]

Thankyou for your reply.

I think i needed to read something like that =)

I will just take things as they come, just alot more relaxed etc. and wait for her to make a move

Thanks buddy.

 

[Big Eee Zee]

watch the ex thing. That WILL come back to bite you. you have two options:

1.) develop prefect game NOW and work it FAST, get to her before he does.

2.) Give it up.


Honestly, many girls do go back to their ex's, especially early in their lives (pre-30). Trust me, I think my ex wants my nuts again. It happens.