"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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My Power, My Frame and the Dynamics Thereof

5string

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What I am trying to do here, is explain the dynamics of my marriage basically. How the IL stays high, how it's maintained and the roles that both of us have assumed voluntarily. In other words, how it works. Every relationship is different so do not take this as gospel. It's just how it works, at least for us.

I'm in my 50's now. White collar guy during the day, jeans n t-shirts at night. Really nice home, no debt and a 6 digit income. To a degree, I have status. I'm highly educated and well read. Now that I have told you how fvckin great I am, let me tell you about the other half.

She's an RN and brings home money as well. Smart, good looking and a killer figure (cordoncordon....I'll send you a pic).

We have taken on traditional roles in our marriage. I'm the hunter gatherer, and what I say goes. Does the wife contribute to the household? Of course she does. She shops for my clothes, cleans the house, get's up every morning at 6 to make my breakfast which I take to work. She even puts little love notes in my breakfast bag every now and then. The love is there guys. Plus, she fvcks me silly and vice versa. Always willing to try something new. She also makes a real effort to be feminine. Wears dresses and heels at the house, has her nails done and her appearance all said and done, is that of a woman who takes care of herself. She has pride.

What do I do? I bring home the bacon. I take care of her. I maintain her lifestyle and she rewards me for it (not a gold digger). She just knows how to be a wife and lover.

Mrs.5string knows I have options and she could be replaced in short order. At least she thinks so which is fine by me. All said and done, she's got a pretty good gig and is willing to do whatever it takes to maintain the marriage in it's present stage.

So what am I trying to pass along here? Maybe it's that if you can find a woman who is a bit traditional and somewhat submissive, she just might be the ticket. A woman who is motivated to please her man is the best thing that could happen to a guy. But, you have to reward her for it. It's a two way street.

And to the new mods....why don't you create a married man forum so I can post all of my bullsh!t over there? :D
 
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"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Scaramouche

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Dear 5String,
"If it has tires on it or bleeds once a month, you'll have trouble with it."
 

5string

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Scaramouche said:
Dear 5String,
"If it has tires on it or bleeds once a month, you'll have trouble with it."
Dear Scaramouche

Very true brother. We just do the best we can.
 

Strelok

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The Long-termers subforum would be great in fact it's actually the reason Im on this forum,mostly management.

And op bring more stuff on the topic ;)
 

Atom Smasher

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5string said:
And to the new mods....why don't you create a married man forum so I can post all of my bullsh!t over there? :D
First things first. Does Mrs. 5string have a single sister?

A married man forum might be a good idea but on the ohter hand it's also good for the single guys to see the perspective from "the other side". They would never enter the hallowed halls of the married forum.

For example, your post shows these young guys that it is possible to have a marriage that works. I still do see benefit of your idea, though.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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5string

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samspade said:
5String, your description could easily apply to my marriage/wife. In fact, my wife put a love note in the lunch she packed for me today. I think she could sense that I was feeling a little run down last night and this morning. Well - it cheered me up.

She's always telling me she "wants to be something good for" me. We both have good jobs but she's willing to go wherever I want to. I even floated the idea of quitting our jobs next year and traveling for a year - and she was all for it.
Way cool!

The note I got today said "Wooh baby! Love you".

I'm kinda partial to the dirty, suggestive notes as I'm a bit of a perv! :D

Please don't quit your job in this economy. May not be able to get it back.
 

5string

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Atom Smasher said:
First things first. Does Mrs. 5string have a single sister?

A married man forum might be a good idea but on the ohter hand it's also good for the single guys to see the perspective from "the other side". They would never enter the hallowed halls of the married forum.

For example, your post shows these young guys that it is possible to have a marriage that works. I still do see benefit of your idea, though.
You would not want one of her sisters. Hate to say it, but they should all be sniffin' luggage at the airport.

I got the only good one out of the litter.
 

Colossus

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5string said:
So what am I trying to pass along here? Maybe it's that if you can find a woman who is a bit traditional and somewhat submissive, she just might be the ticket. A woman who is motivated to please her man is the best thing that could happen to a guy. But, you have to reward her for it. It's a two way street.

And to the new mods....why don't you create a married man forum so I can post all of my bullsh!t over there? :D
Great take-home message. It IS a two-way street.

As for the sub-forum, that's not a bad idea. There are enough postes about LTRs and marriage that it could feasibly populate a separate forum. I'll bring it up with the other mods and see what they think.
 
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