My low self esteem made me lose a good opportunity. But i learned a good lesson.

[pabloescobar]

So I went to a nightclub after quite a long time with some friends, we drank some aguardiente but the ambient wasn't good so two friends and I moved to another nightclub. I took dance classes for the last 3 weeks and tbh I noticed how I improved so much, I now dance to the rhythm of the beat and I can move my hips with more ease!
So I was kind of unmotivated but I tried my best to dance and have fun, and some girl appeared and danced close to us, she was trying to get closer to me but I didn't realize that well, until a friend whispered to me that she wanted me or something, and I was still kind of shocked, dancing like normal but I didn't have the guts... when I had she told me her boyfriend (who was NEXT TO HER) was getting jealous, I told her that it was his problem and we laughed but I didn't have the guts to start grinding her. (i noticed her boyfriend was mostly a chode and I was with three friends and some guy we met along the way, so if a fight appeared I would have the advantage even if that guy had 10+ years than me).
So eventually she left but at least I could get her Instagram, but I knew, and my friends, and the guy who we met told me that I legit ****ed up.

The girl was very pretty tbh, and if I saw her outside the nightclub I would think she is out of my league, that even if I approached she would not follow, let alone she APPROACHING me. One of the two friends I was with is like 4 years older and I thought myself like less attractive than them, but she approached me (and the guy we met turned out to be gay and approached me too lol), and after that, my friend told me "you are legit that hot? lol
I discovered then two things: One, I have some low confidence or self-esteem that holds me for having the courage to get what I want, and Two, me not going for what I wanted, made some guy have a false impression of me. It was a blow for my ego, but at least I hope to learn out of this. I will have to get more confidence somehow, although I made some progress, going back to the gym and starting dance classes, i think I need a more psychological solution (without psychologists)

Thanks for reading, I just wrote this after getting back from the nightclub.

 

[cruzinV]

I have low self esteem too because I'm ugly but that really doesnt stop me from approaching and hitting on chicks. I just pretty much know the approach is not gonna lead to anything but I still do it.

 

[Serenity]

I will have to get more confidence somehow, although I made some progress, going back to the gym and starting dance classes, i think I need a more psychological solution (without psychologists)

Somehow? Confidence comes from within. You know how you would act as if you had it, but confidence is a lack of trust in yourself, basically you believe yourself not to be able to do it. If you think about it for no more than 10 seconds you realize that's bullsh!t, of course you can act like that. Imagine looking at yourself as if you looked at someone else, when it's not yourself doing it you can very clearly tell how it should be done. Look at yourself like that and simply execute the actions of a confident person, ignore your fears. Any discomfort will eventually pass and you'll FEEL confident.

That's how you fake it till you make it. You do the actions first, get the feeling of confidence after that which in turn makes it a lot easier for every time.

I went all in on the psychological route to solve my confidence issues, today nobody questions my confidence. I am completely confident that my method works, I will never again in my life feel a lack of confidence in social situations.

 

[backseatjuan]

Confidence don’t fall on you from the sky. Confidence comes when you try things. Realize that given a choice between pain and less pain, you choose less pain. It’s natural. Thus you chose less risk.

If there is trouble be that trouble that’s the only way to get confident.