"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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met the girl, made the call, help me with my next move

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Friday:
I met this HB9 at a college house party on friday. We met through a mutual friend (also a female). We hung out, had a good time, and I'm sure that I made a great impression.

Saturday:
In fact, the mutual friend texted me the next night. This message informed me that this HB9 was with her and they were wondering what I was doing that night because we had such a great time the night before. We didn't end up hanging out but its a good sign that they were thinking about me.

Sunday:
No contact.

Monday:
I made the call at around 10 pm. It went something like this.

Me: "Hey (said her name)"
HB9: "Hello"
Me: "Its (said my name)"
HB9: (She said my name back to me very enthusiastically indicating that she was very happy to hear from me)
Me: "How was your day?"
HB9: (She said that her day went well and inquired about mine)
Me: "My day was also spectacular. I'm going to the mall tomorrow, I thought you might like to come"
HB9: (She asked what time I had in mind)
Me: (I asked when she was done with classes tomorrow)
HB9: She said that she would be done around 4:30
Me: "How about I pick you up at your dorm around 5:30"
HB9: (She said that it sounds like fun but she would like to make sure that she didn't have anything she needed to do that would prevent her from going to the mall. She asked if she could call me back later tonight or early tomorrow to let me know for sure.)
Me: (I said that she could call me back, but I might make other plans before she calls back)

The entire conversation lasted just under two minutes.



I was disappointed that she didn't accept my proposal without reservation. There are a few options I can take from here. If she calls back to confirm, I can tell her that I already made plans for tomorrow and suggest an alternative time. Or I can indicate that I'm still available and go with her.

But, if she calls back and says that she is not available. How would a DJ handle this?

P.S. I suggested going to the mall because we can stroll around and check **** out and have plenty of time for conversation. When we were at the party, we had a great time, but I didn't have much time for one on one conversation. I wasn't really able to show her that I was interested by asking questions about her. Strolling around the mall would allow me to catch up. I am confident enough in my conversation skills that I can keep her entertained without a real activity planned. Plus, I like cheap (free) activities for first dates, and also, weekday activities seem to work well for first outings.

Thanks in advance for your advice. I'll be watching this thread to answer questions of clarification.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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governor

Don Juan
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If she's not available, just go "that's sweet, blah blah, i'll talk to you soon.bye"
don't set up another date that phone convo - she'll be wondering if she screwed it up.
then a few days/week later try again.
 

Capitol39

Senior Don Juan
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CA
Hey Jay, do you eat horse all the time?
 

Tomatoes

Master Don Juan
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When she calls back.

If she cant come out....Ok blah blah blah another time.

If she can....Go out with her. Dont cancel on her. It was your idea to arrange to go out. If you make other plans after asking you will look like abit of an ass.

I think she def digs you. Go to the mall if you feel comfortable there. (I wouldnt date there). Afterwards judge the convo and how well you are vibing with her. If so sort out to meet up....Something a little more intimate. One on One. Later in the evening. Cinema or dinner or something.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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