Masculinity & Directness in 2016

[Stugots26]

I see the college campus culture of safe spaces and ideology of comfort graduating with most women and continuing with them in the form of their smart phones and the dating apps. On their phones and through their apps, they can create an artificial safe space where they think they can continuously engage an unknown guy for as long as they want until they feel comfortable and want to progress it to a real meetup.

You can see this manifest itself today as most women consider it an entire phase/status of the mating dance to be "talking" to a guy before actually "dating."

But remember, most women don't know or don't want to acknowledge what they most primally emotionally respond to. Sure, the process of "meeting" and "talking" and then dating can lead a woman to find a guy who she is maybe a 7 on a scale of 1 to 10 attracted to, but by virtue of his being willing to placate and indulge her delicate sensibilities and comfort level by progressing through whatever virtual communication hoops she's set up, she'll never be as deeply emotionally attracted to him (and she will in secret resent his malleability and pedestalizing white knight-esque patience) as she will be to a man who she feels instantly attracted to and who refuses to placate and indulge and who instead attempts the most direct contact he can.

I'm a firm believer in being direct and being unwilling to play by a woman's rules to indulge these ridiculous whims. You're interested in what you're interested in - whether that's her number or setting a date on the spot - and your interest is a compliment that should not in ANY way be taken for granted. If she's not willing to act on your limited time offer, you are not sticking around for breadcrumbs or scraps. You're on to the next. It may lower your conversion percentage but in the long run, you're saving yourself time lost from conversing with low-interest fence straddlers. It's just not worth it.

Be direct. Cut through their nonsense. It's worth it in the long run.

 

[El Payaso]

In short, know when to walk away and don't look back.

 

[RangerMIke]

But remember, most women don't know or don't want to acknowledge what they most primally emotionally respond to.

True. That is why a man should never listen to advice on women from women. Because they just don't know. When women falls in love with men, they really have no fvcking idea how that happened. To women, love is 'magic'... it ain't magic.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Yep, get to the ****ing point.

Establish frame and don't deviate.

 

[Stugots26]

With respect to pulling numbers from apps like Tinder - I was beginning to think I should modify my standard test of asking for the number immediately in my first message, and thought maybe I was being too much of a hardass because so many women were taking objection to my directness because they wanted to "get to know each other on here first." Some actually would read and then delete. Adult women who can't cope with a direct man who's going for what he wants? Smh.

Anyway, then just recently I've started getting women on LinkedIn who want to sell me custom suits, real estate, etc. messaging me directly and dropping their cell phone numbers on me, a stranger, without me even asking. So in the right context, when there's commissions to be made, the stranger danger fear goes RIGHT OUT THE WINDOW.

Never forget that these women have agency - the power to make choices - and they'll make different ones dictated by self-interest. So every time that a woman on one of these apps acts like it's an imposition for you, a "stranger," to be asking for her number immediately, remember that if she were trying to sell you something for which she would make a commission, she'd happily give you three different ways to reach her. That means that at least on some level, giving you a hard time about her number in the dating context is game-playing and manipulation for frame control.

 

[Yewki]

So every time that a woman on one of these apps acts like it's an imposition for you, a "stranger," to be asking for her number immediately, remember that if she were trying to sell you something for which she would make a commission, she'd happily give you three different ways to reach her. That means that at least on some level, giving you a hard time about her number in the dating context is game-playing and manipulation for frame control.

Bra... getting a number for business vs pleasure is totally different. LinkedIn is a business site. Tinder is a hook up site. There's no double standard going on.

And are you really surprised at the results when you ask for their number in the first message on Tinder?

 

[Stugots26]

Bra... getting a number for business vs pleasure is totally different. LinkedIn is a business site. Tinder is a hook up site. There's no double standard going on.

Asking for a number is a compliance test. I'm perfectly polite about it. Some women will hand it over, most won't. I'm fine with that.