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Married co-worker

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Hi!

I´m new in this forum, such great reading.

Well, I have a female co-worker that is married and with 2 kids. She sits next to me and we have developed a good relationship and even friendship. I have all things very clear about NOT getting involved with married women, but lately she has been looking at me in a "different" way. She flirt hard with me and really, it`s very obvious that she is decided to **** with me. She is beautiful and have a lot of attention from all male workers here. I just treat her nice, but I`m getting nervous, I don´t wanna do it. I feel that I´m at risk of develope strong feelings for her if we became involved phisically. I´m dating 2 girls outside work and having fun with my friends, but I need help and advice from you guys. Please tell me anything that keeps me away from her and her seduction. I don´t wanna do it but it´s f****ng hard. Sometimes I feel sad and exausted.
(sorry, my english it`s not my mother language).
Thanks a lot guys !
 

Tictac

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Dr. Winston O´Boogie said:
Hi!

I have all things very clear about NOT getting involved with married women, but lately she has been looking at me in a "different" way. !
----------

Uh, no you don't.

Doing married women is for idiots.

There is always another woman,
 

Atom Smasher

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Think about the destruction of her children and her husband.

Do you really want to be a part of that? Don't risk destroying others' lives just for a night of fun.
 

Mike32ct

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Most important is what AS said.

But I will also add that women cannot keep secrets. At some point, she will "brag" to her gf or possibly another coworker that she "trusts." It won't stay secret that long.

Affairs are also highly addictive and tend to go on for MUCH longer than both people ever planned. Often, a fling turns into an affair of several years because they are so addictive and very difficult to end.

Don't do it.
 

CrimsonPanther

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here's my take on it:
women tend to find excuses and justifications for their cheating.
possible results (all of these happened to me, and they all suck):
- she will hate you afterwards and fuk up your job
- she will tell others, including her husband, who will possibly kick your ass if you are not lucky
- she will convince herself she is in love with you, destroy her family, and cling onto you, expecting you to be her new husband (father of her children etc)

- other outcomes, but i don't have experience with those.

my advice: use this as an ego boost to go out and pick up AVAILABLE women.

but whatever you choose, do it with caution.
 

HalfPUAHalfAFC

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Everyone here is right so far...

She'll talk to someone eventually. Word will get out.

Word will get out at work, which will suck.

You could end up assisting her in trashing her family.

Hubby could be violent.

If you do it and it goes south, she might try to salvage situation with hubby by claiming sexual harassment on your part at work.

Besides a couple of possibly good bangs, I see no upside here. You have two other plates, stick to them.
 
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Thanks friends, I am looking for this kind of help, because I´m feeling bad about this. Sometimes I feel that I have to do it, as a "male duty" or something, she may think that I´m gay. I´m so confused I have a headache. Thanks again guys for your help and please keep posting.
 

Uncharted

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Ummmm......

MARRIED

COWORKER

Are you for real? Find some single chick that you don't work with.
 

expos

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Don't do it. Seriously, what is the point? Do you intend on adopting the two kids as your own? Is that your end game? Or is your end game destroying another guy's life? Granted, the wife is probably making his life hell anyways.

Some dudes who have had their wife cheat on them have committed suicide over situations like this.

Walk away and find a better woman, one who will not cheat ON YOU when you are with her.
 

Mike32ct

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Dr. Winston O´Boogie said:
Thanks friends, I am looking for this kind of help, because I´m feeling bad about this. Sometimes I feel that I have to do it, as a "male duty" or something, she may think that I´m gay. I´m so confused I have a headache. Thanks again guys for your help and please keep posting.
You have NO obligation to pursue this. That's just silly ego stuff. She can think whatever she wants.

Honestly, let her think you're gay. It doesn't matter. Focus on single chicks outside of work and don't even mention THAT. Let women wonder "what your deal is." It's FAR, FAR better than to mess around with a married coworker.

She probably will find another guy, possibly at work. Do NOT let that bother you or cause you to regret no going for it. Let some other guy do something stupid.
 

Bokanovsky

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Atom Smasher said:
Think about the destruction of her children and her husband.

Do you really want to be a part of that? Don't risk destroying others' lives just for a night of fun.
I wouldn't worry about that too much. Chances are, the b!tch has already cheated on her husband (or will in the near future regardless of OP's involvement). I would be more concerned about the possible and very likely negative career implications of doing what OP is about to do.
 

Bokanovsky

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CrimsonPanther said:
here's my take on it:
women tend to find excuses and justifications for their cheating.
possible results (all of these happened to me, and they all suck):
- she will hate you afterwards and fuk up your job
- she will tell others, including her husband, who will possibly kick your ass if you are not lucky
- she will convince herself she is in love with you, destroy her family, and cling onto you, expecting you to be her new husband (father of her children etc)

- other outcomes, but i don't have experience with those.

my advice: use this as an ego boost to go out and pick up AVAILABLE women.

but whatever you choose, do it with caution.
Solid post.
 

user name

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the office babe who I 'fell' for left 8 months ago.

I am still feeling the embarrassment everytime I see one of those other guys in the HR dept who slept with her or kissed her walk past, or from anyone who happens to know how I 'felt' about her.

Don't do it.
 
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You are right, I have thought all of these, but she is with me all 5 days of the week and she is very atractive. I cannot be cold as ice, she would notice that something happens and I´m playing good. I don´t tell her that her skirt is nice, or "you look beautiful today" or any of that. ALL the guys here tell those things to her all the time, but I don´t want to do anything near a flirt. But I think that sometimes that´s worst. She wants to be next to me all the time; lunch, breaks, coffee, shopping. She even make little plans for us to cover all week long. She´s great though, a fun person. I´m gonna be strong, and I´ll take all your advice. Thanks, keep posting, it really helps.
 

Epimanes

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Dr. Winston O´Boogie said:
I don´t tell her that her skirt is nice, or "you look beautiful today" or any of that. ALL the guys here tell those things to her all the time, but I don´t want to do anything near a flirt.
You see... By not acting desperate... And validating her like everyone else she senses your the prize to be won. She already knows she could have any of the "other guys" but because your not responding like all the "other guys" your a challenge. She is trying to bait you and seeking ways to get that validation from you. I'm sure she is going to pull all the stops out to see what it takes to get you to be more interested.

Maybe set up her cheating ass. Play along with it and have her hubby on the sidelines to witness his wife cheating or willing to cheat. Agree to a date and then have her husband waiting there instead at the secret location only you and her know about...

Of course only do that if your evil.

Otherwise stay the heck away from married women. If it was my wife and kids and you did follow through. I would probably be going to jail for some form of violence.

Epi
 

VikingKing

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Look at his name. I know how we deal with trolls is to treat them seriously, not giving them the satisfaction of getting a reaction.

But if some of you don't realize this is a troll. wtf. but we should either ban trolls, or "take them seriously' which defeats them quickly.

just saying.
 
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noobolgy said:
Look at his name
I didn´t know that your nickname has to be your real name. Oh, look at your "real" name too. Give me a break...

noobolgy said:
But if some of you don't realize this is a troll
I´m not really sure what "troll" exactly means, but I guess it´s someone who writes false stories in this site. Well, I´m not a troll. My story is 100% real. I´m from Chile and I work in a retail company. I´m 31 years old and she´s 33.

To all that read my problem, please give me feedback, because I´m starting to get addicted to her presence, smile, smell, voice. Sadly my girl friends are not as hot as my co-worker is. So I got a real mess here in my head.
 

adam225

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expos said:
Don't do it. Seriously, what is the point? Do you intend on adopting the two kids as your own? Is that your end game? Or is your end game destroying another guy's life? Granted, the wife is probably making his life hell anyways.

Some dudes who have had their wife cheat on them have committed suicide over situations like this.

Walk away and find a better woman, one who will not cheat ON YOU when you are with her.
Agreed. I know of two who are dead thanks to women.
 

DonGorgon

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Dr. Winston O´Boogie said:
Hi!

I´m new in this forum, such great reading.

Well, I have a female co-worker that is married and with 2 kids. She sits next to me and we have developed a good relationship and even friendship. I have all things very clear about NOT getting involved with married women, but lately she has been looking at me in a "different" way. She flirt hard with me and really, it`s very obvious that she is decided to **** with me. She is beautiful and have a lot of attention from all male workers here. I just treat her nice, but I`m getting nervous, I don´t wanna do it. I feel that I´m at risk of develope strong feelings for her if we became involved phisically. I´m dating 2 girls outside work and having fun with my friends, but I need help and advice from you guys. Please tell me anything that keeps me away from her and her seduction. I don´t wanna do it but it´s f****ng hard. Sometimes I feel sad and exausted.
(sorry, my english it`s not my mother language).
Thanks a lot guys !
all married men and men who plan to get married din the future .. you need to accept that this is what your wife will do . she will meet men at work an other places and start Fing them... she will deny it hide it and you will never know
 

expos

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DonGorgon said:
all married men and men who plan to get married din the future .. you need to accept that this is what your wife will do . she will meet men at work an other places and start Fing them... she will deny it hide it and you will never know
My ex-wife would always tell me about the women in her office who would lust after their co-workers. The guys were also married but it did not stop them from flirting and going out to lunch with them. I'd say 3/4's of her co-workers had what I'd call "office boyfriends". I had seen these guys and all but one was actually a good looking! I was rather disgusted when I attended a Holiday party with all of these people well knowing the husbands of these women were all victims of emotional/physical cheating.

Around the time my divorce was finalized, my ex-wife possibly got with a guy she worked with and they are still together to this day. She went through dramatic weight loss and got very pretty again just before the papers were filed. It is more than likely they had something going while we were married because she had worked with him for a number of years but she was pretty secretive about it.

If I would have found out about this guy while we were married, you can best bet I would have beat him within an inch of his life.

You don't want to even know the pain I went through after I found out..but I'm OK now because I've banged three girls since my divorce that were all better looking than my wife and I owe my wife nothing anyways (no child/support or alimony), so I got off easy. Most are not as lucky as me.

The work environment is toxic/fairytale place for women because they are seeing their male co-workers at their very best. Power attracts women. My wife didn't work with me, so she never saw me in my position of power. Instead they go home to their husbands and they have deal with the reality of who these guys really are...and the guy at work looks 100 times better by comparison because they don't have to deal with their bullsh!t on a nightly basis. I equate it to watching a professional athlete have a great game. He may look amazing on the field of play, but you don't have to go home with him and watch him be boring, act like a jerk, watch him pick his nose, or do other undesirable things.

It's grass is greener syndrome...and the guy she works with really isn't anything special or better than you. In fact, once I saw the guy my ex got with, I laughed. He's a fat, ugly slob.

I guarantee that the woman you describe is merely hanging on to her marriage because of the support her husband gives her and because of her kids. That marriage has been toast for a long time and this woman is badly damaged and is looking for validation or any kind. Sooner or later, this marriage will end.

If you sleep with this woman, not only will it ruin her life, her kid's life, and her husband's life, it will ruin your career, and nobody will remember you for the great work you did, but how you were nothing but a scumbag who played a role in wrecking a family.

time to man up and ignore this woman..and if she puts the moves on you, firmly tell her that you want nothing to do with her and report her to HR.
 

Tell her a little about yourself, but not too much. Maintain some mystery. Give her something to think about and wonder about when she's at home.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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