Little help in this area.

[Fitters]

Started dating a girl for about a year now. Since day one I mostly pay for everything ( dinners , shows etc )
Granted those things do not hurt me because I make a fair amount of income and I manage to save a good chunk besides the spending.
At first I didn't really expect nothing out of her because she is a student and her main focus is school right now.

However , I was expecting at least a coffee date or something little not over the top. I get really , make a list of red flags before addressing issues in my relationship. When we talk about life , she talks about the man been the man of the house and taking care of her wife ( flag 1)
Then she would make comments about me taking her to get her nails and hair dobe ( flag 2). I denied all the request but took her to get a nails done on her birthday.
So last night she asked me if I could give her money to do her hair and I said I don't think so but I will think about it. Then she wanted me to also take her shopping or get her nails done since that's what "most boyfriends" do for their girls.

I got angry but told her I will think about it. After giving it thought , it didn't sit well with me . I told her in person I will not be giving her the money because I'm not a sugar daddy. I know girls younger than her that do those things by themselves.
She wanted to turn it into an argument as girls do as usual ; when I didn't react she told me to never take her out again and not spend a dime on her. To which I replied okay then walked away.

My thoughts are that I don't mind when we go out and do things together because true be told she can't afford it. But when she begins to ask for requests and claim " I have to do it " because other boyfriends do it then that's crossing the line. And quiet frankly that's a line I'm willing to get everything go if she insists on it. Besides this issue , she is a great girl. No complains on attitude or the way she carries her self.

Any input on this or advice ?

 

[Julian]

u give an inch they take a mile. your failure in this as a man was because you said yourself, you paid for everything since day one with no expectation of anything in return. basically you set a precedent there by making it seem like you have no problem taking care of your woman when it comes to all of those needs. foods dates entertainment blablabla...so in her mind you have now enabled her to ask for more and a closed mouth dont get fed right.

you didnt create a frame of earning and respect. you gave it to her all with nothing in return then a year later you get mad about it. u dont give her some ill think about it crap. you need to be calculated in your decision. from the getgo you should have split the costs on dates or alternated who pays etc. My gf bought me a 500 dollar video game system, thousand dollars in jewlery, paid for most of the meals etc but thats because i came from the frame of being the prize. also she was BPD as fuk but lets just gloss over that for now lol.

the point is you finish how you start my friend. you need to lay out in the beginning how its going to go down. it will save you alot of headache


If she requests something like to pay for her nails...make it something she can earn "mmm ok honey i do want your nails to look sexy...i feel like the fridge an the kitchen really do need a deep cleaning, can you take care of that baby and when its sparkling and beautiful we will go and get your hands nice an manicured.

Then in the future if she wants to continue having beautiful nails you make sure she is fully trained to keep the house clean to your specifications or any other tasks you need accomplished. its a small cost to pay and gives you the power and control.

 

[dude99]

Started dating a girl for about a year now. Since day one I mostly pay for everything ( dinners , shows etc )
Granted those things do not hurt me because I make a fair amount of income and I manage to save a good chunk besides the spending.
At first I didn't really expect nothing out of her because she is a student and her main focus is school right now.

However , I was expecting at least a coffee date or something little not over the top. I get really , make a list of red flags before addressing issues in my relationship. When we talk about life , she talks about the man been the man of the house and taking care of her wife ( flag 1)
Then she would make comments about me taking her to get her nails and hair dobe ( flag 2). I denied all the request but took her to get a nails done on her birthday.
So last night she asked me if I could give her money to do her hair and I said I don't think so but I will think about it. Then she wanted me to also take her shopping or get her nails done since that's what "most boyfriends" do for their girls.

I got angry but told her I will think about it. After giving it thought , it didn't sit well with me . I told her in person I will not be giving her the money because I'm not a sugar daddy. I know girls younger than her that do those things by themselves.
She wanted to turn it into an argument as girls do as usual ; when I didn't react she told me to never take her out again and not spend a dime on her. To which I replied okay then walked away.

My thoughts are that I don't mind when we go out and do things together because true be told she can't afford it. But when she begins to ask for requests and claim " I have to do it " because other boyfriends do it then that's crossing the line. And quiet frankly that's a line I'm willing to get everything go if she insists on it. Besides this issue , she is a great girl. No complains on attitude or the way she carries her self.

Any input on this or advice ?

Cut bait.

It will start with every once in a while next thing you know she will be handing you credit card bills that she ran up buying purses and shoes and tell you, you're the man it's your duty to pay my bills. Then she will have your ballz in her purse and walk around with a sense of entitlement like "she deserves to be pampered."

This one is not good. She is givingyou a window into the future.

Walk away while you still can.

 

[john1234]

"she talks about the man been the man of the house and taking care of her wife ( flag 1)"

If I got a quid for every time I have heard a woman say this,I would be a very rich man.