Ive made posts about his girl I have been dating the past 3 months. In the past month we been having more and more problems. Some of it due to my fault of being overly analytical, and actually showing interest more in her. The first month or so of dating her, I didn't really care much for her, I was acting aloof, busy, not giving her the time of the day, just using everthing I have learned on this site so far. At that point she was all over me, calling me, asking me to hangout everyday, asked me to come eat at her restaurant, introduced me to her best girlfriends and tell me how much she likes me everyday.
But after a while I started realizing that I am getting a ONEitis to this chick, all this tips, ideas and theories became alot harder to do, all of the sudden my heart started taking over, the feeling of "caring" and "affection" started to come out of me and I even blurted out the words "I LIKE YOU" one time because I thought she was out with another guy. The feeling of wanting to have something more with this girl took over me. Showing signs of desperation and neediness started to appear more. Next thing you know, the tables have turned on her. I even told her "Now that I finally admitt that I like you, you have the power now".
All of the sudden I started noticing her calling me a little bit less, still calling me, but a little less. Her ways of going out of the way to see me, became less and less. To the point, I actualy was the one who started asking her to hang out. Calling her more and asking "Where is she?" and "What is she doing?" more and more to the point it even pissed her one time.
Eventually, thankgsgiving night we were hanging out, and she kept saying she was only going to hang out with me up until her best gf calls her. Well, someone did call her, with the same name as her best gf that I've met, but it was a guy. She though I didn't know, and next thing you know she had to go and see her "GF" at 10pm on thanksgiving night.
I let it slide, just keeping it as a suspicion for a couple of days. But two nigts later I ended up going out with some friends and called her drunk and said some rude things to her without mentioning this. The next day she told me what she said. Couple of days passed again, till I eventually decided to get the truth out of her by saying "Look, I know you didn;t go to see your gf that night, don't even deny it. I know for a fact it was a guy named....She was shocked, asking me who told me? am I spying on her? and then told me to **** off and she doesnt want to be friends. But then calling me 15 minutes later and saying she feels like crap, this and that, she is horrible, she wants me to forgive her...blah blah blah.
I told her thats fine, I told her I am not even mad at her, I am dissapointed with her and I thought she was better than that. We ended up talking two days later, at my own damn fault, instead of reading on this forum, I dwellved in my heart about "How could she do this?" So I called her from work during my break, telling her that I don't think I can be friends.
Anyways, to make this shorter, she showed up to my work that same day, I had her escorted out by the security guard from the lobby because she was causing a scene. She thought I was going to tell her new romantic interest of this. I had to go to lunch early, met her and she proffesed on how much she doesnt want me to hate her and how much I made her life so much happier and the fact that I have always told her that I don't want to be in a relationship and never called her my GF pushed her away from me...I said if she wanted to be with me, she would have brought it up. She said she was affraid to scare me off. (I told her it sounds like a crock a **** to me)
We met one more time after that, a day later. Where I told her that I really liked her, but she has dissapointed me, I told her I thought she was a good person and I will not let her LJBF me because I had romantic interest in her and now I am to dissapointed to even be friends with her becuse she displayed characters I do not like. She told me she hates me, because we were driving in my car and I took her cell phone away and told her she can go get her pedicure when we are done talking. She beat the leaving crap out of my shoulder, gave me a hell of a titty twister and kept crying and yelling to hit her when she was hitting me, told me to let her out of the car and kept grabbing my steering wheel and swerving the car. Told me one of her ex's used to beat her and the other one used to stalk her when she broke up with him. She mentioned it because she was hitting me and wanted me to hit her back to make myself feel better because I was angry. I told her I will emotionally get back at her, but I am not a vindictive person and I would never do that, I just say things out of anger.
After an hour of driving around and having her yell things like "I will never be happy!" "Youre the kinda person that will take me to the woods and chop me up", "3 months messing around without calling us in a relationship is bs", "I dont even want to be friends with you anymore, you're crazy and I hate you" and all sorts of other stuff.
I dropped her off at her car and I told her that I hope she will be happy in her other quests in life and explained her that despite all this, I dont hate her, I am just dissapointed with her, I thought she was a better and more mature person then that and that one day she will be happy. She kinda sat there and hesitate to get out for a couple of seconds till I said "Goodbye".
I also realized, she is crazy! But I do feel bad for her. She is going through some hard times in life, with her father being really sick, and her unlike other hot chicks, she actually works for everthing herself, nothing has been handed to her on a platter because she comes from an immigrant family. I feel bad for her.
What I have Learned:
1. Girls with bad relationship experiences are fvcked in the head and have low self esteem issues that will quickly go and seek approval from other males.
2. Even though, I can bed a girl here and there, but once I start seeing her after a while, I get a feeling of attachment and its apperant. Its hard not to show your emotion when you develop it. If it happends, I will do my best to hide it and not reveal what I am feeling.
3. I will never let a woman know that I like her. I will keep her guessing, leave her in the dark about my personal life. Will act aloof with her like I did in the beginning even after seeing her for 3 months. I will pursue other women and enjoy my life without giving her the time of the day like i did the first 6 weeks.
4. This one I am not sure about. We kept telling each other we didn't want to be in a relationship. And honestly, I don't really know if I want to be in one, I did find some things I liked in her, but I kept telling her I don't want a relationship and she would say the same thing till she started balling and crying to me saying that she called me her bf to all her best friends, but to me she would tell that she does not want to confide.
5. Do not get serious with a woman ages 18-23.
6. Next time, if I find out a woman has lied to me about another male, or something else that is serious, I will automatically cut her off without the drama. Just start ignoring her phone calls and not pick fights and display any emotion. Just cut her out.
7. Women will lie and sneak around you, and keep you as a sidekick, if you start treating her well. She will confuse kindness for a weakness, therefore, I will never let my emotion get the better or worst of me. I will show no emotion what so ever.
8. It is my fault anyways. If I kept telling her I do not want to be in a relationship and hear the same from her. I should have never even gotten mad in the first place at her for seeing another guy. I got more at the fact that she would lie and disrepect me like that. The better approach would have been indifference and cutting her off.
But after a while I started realizing that I am getting a ONEitis to this chick, all this tips, ideas and theories became alot harder to do, all of the sudden my heart started taking over, the feeling of "caring" and "affection" started to come out of me and I even blurted out the words "I LIKE YOU" one time because I thought she was out with another guy. The feeling of wanting to have something more with this girl took over me. Showing signs of desperation and neediness started to appear more. Next thing you know, the tables have turned on her. I even told her "Now that I finally admitt that I like you, you have the power now".
All of the sudden I started noticing her calling me a little bit less, still calling me, but a little less. Her ways of going out of the way to see me, became less and less. To the point, I actualy was the one who started asking her to hang out. Calling her more and asking "Where is she?" and "What is she doing?" more and more to the point it even pissed her one time.
Eventually, thankgsgiving night we were hanging out, and she kept saying she was only going to hang out with me up until her best gf calls her. Well, someone did call her, with the same name as her best gf that I've met, but it was a guy. She though I didn't know, and next thing you know she had to go and see her "GF" at 10pm on thanksgiving night.
I let it slide, just keeping it as a suspicion for a couple of days. But two nigts later I ended up going out with some friends and called her drunk and said some rude things to her without mentioning this. The next day she told me what she said. Couple of days passed again, till I eventually decided to get the truth out of her by saying "Look, I know you didn;t go to see your gf that night, don't even deny it. I know for a fact it was a guy named....She was shocked, asking me who told me? am I spying on her? and then told me to **** off and she doesnt want to be friends. But then calling me 15 minutes later and saying she feels like crap, this and that, she is horrible, she wants me to forgive her...blah blah blah.
I told her thats fine, I told her I am not even mad at her, I am dissapointed with her and I thought she was better than that. We ended up talking two days later, at my own damn fault, instead of reading on this forum, I dwellved in my heart about "How could she do this?" So I called her from work during my break, telling her that I don't think I can be friends.
Anyways, to make this shorter, she showed up to my work that same day, I had her escorted out by the security guard from the lobby because she was causing a scene. She thought I was going to tell her new romantic interest of this. I had to go to lunch early, met her and she proffesed on how much she doesnt want me to hate her and how much I made her life so much happier and the fact that I have always told her that I don't want to be in a relationship and never called her my GF pushed her away from me...I said if she wanted to be with me, she would have brought it up. She said she was affraid to scare me off. (I told her it sounds like a crock a **** to me)
We met one more time after that, a day later. Where I told her that I really liked her, but she has dissapointed me, I told her I thought she was a good person and I will not let her LJBF me because I had romantic interest in her and now I am to dissapointed to even be friends with her becuse she displayed characters I do not like. She told me she hates me, because we were driving in my car and I took her cell phone away and told her she can go get her pedicure when we are done talking. She beat the leaving crap out of my shoulder, gave me a hell of a titty twister and kept crying and yelling to hit her when she was hitting me, told me to let her out of the car and kept grabbing my steering wheel and swerving the car. Told me one of her ex's used to beat her and the other one used to stalk her when she broke up with him. She mentioned it because she was hitting me and wanted me to hit her back to make myself feel better because I was angry. I told her I will emotionally get back at her, but I am not a vindictive person and I would never do that, I just say things out of anger.
After an hour of driving around and having her yell things like "I will never be happy!" "Youre the kinda person that will take me to the woods and chop me up", "3 months messing around without calling us in a relationship is bs", "I dont even want to be friends with you anymore, you're crazy and I hate you" and all sorts of other stuff.
I dropped her off at her car and I told her that I hope she will be happy in her other quests in life and explained her that despite all this, I dont hate her, I am just dissapointed with her, I thought she was a better and more mature person then that and that one day she will be happy. She kinda sat there and hesitate to get out for a couple of seconds till I said "Goodbye".
I also realized, she is crazy! But I do feel bad for her. She is going through some hard times in life, with her father being really sick, and her unlike other hot chicks, she actually works for everthing herself, nothing has been handed to her on a platter because she comes from an immigrant family. I feel bad for her.
What I have Learned:
1. Girls with bad relationship experiences are fvcked in the head and have low self esteem issues that will quickly go and seek approval from other males.
2. Even though, I can bed a girl here and there, but once I start seeing her after a while, I get a feeling of attachment and its apperant. Its hard not to show your emotion when you develop it. If it happends, I will do my best to hide it and not reveal what I am feeling.
3. I will never let a woman know that I like her. I will keep her guessing, leave her in the dark about my personal life. Will act aloof with her like I did in the beginning even after seeing her for 3 months. I will pursue other women and enjoy my life without giving her the time of the day like i did the first 6 weeks.
4. This one I am not sure about. We kept telling each other we didn't want to be in a relationship. And honestly, I don't really know if I want to be in one, I did find some things I liked in her, but I kept telling her I don't want a relationship and she would say the same thing till she started balling and crying to me saying that she called me her bf to all her best friends, but to me she would tell that she does not want to confide.
5. Do not get serious with a woman ages 18-23.
6. Next time, if I find out a woman has lied to me about another male, or something else that is serious, I will automatically cut her off without the drama. Just start ignoring her phone calls and not pick fights and display any emotion. Just cut her out.
7. Women will lie and sneak around you, and keep you as a sidekick, if you start treating her well. She will confuse kindness for a weakness, therefore, I will never let my emotion get the better or worst of me. I will show no emotion what so ever.
8. It is my fault anyways. If I kept telling her I do not want to be in a relationship and hear the same from her. I should have never even gotten mad in the first place at her for seeing another guy. I got more at the fact that she would lie and disrepect me like that. The better approach would have been indifference and cutting her off.