Pregame with random strangers and a mutual friend. We were at the bar and had amazing interest from a blondie. As we left, I walked with another blondie to the club. I never saw the first one again. Blondie2 and I had good conversation and we get to the rooftop bar. She buys me a drink and we taaalllllkkkkk. No escalation because I was scouting. I never saw her again.
Saw an asian chick waiting in line with the massive c0ckfest at the bar area. I simply told her HEY, you got looks, I got money. Lets grab drinks! Fvck it. I grabbed her waist and pushed her toward the front of the line, through the massive sea of sausages. It was so packed that her t!ts were rubbing against my 6/10 pecs. The feels man. Yes we got our drink and came back to the couch area. Intense conversation with her making out with me. The feels man. I told her that I wanted to drink more, but prices were expensive. Let's bar hop. She agrees. I-S-O-L-A-T-I-O-N.
I use the bathroom and run into long time friend, Beta Bob. This mofo chats my god damn ear out. Jesus Christ. I needed to gracefully excuse myself. 'Hey man, you're awesome, but I need my d!ck sucked tonight.' He gives me a brofist and his Beta Blessings.
I come back to the chick and she was getting hit on by another dood. He is feeding her a DOUBLE SHOT. Okay. I know her tolerance level and this can not be happening. This is that shot that goes over the top. This was the last shot. This was the fvcking c0ckblock shot.
GIF of what I wanted to do
I had the greatest decision of my Friday Night. Either slither back in the sea of orbiters and find other options, OR AMOG the fvck out of this dude. (See: Productive C0ckblocking)
I introduce myself and he said his name was Aaron. Whayyylennn? I said. No. It's Aaron. Oh. Guy is like 4 inches taller than me with hostile tendencies. Let me diffuse this situation - I put my leg on asian chicks' and she put her hand on it. Fight awkwardness with offensive awkwardness. Fvck it, this piece of meat is mine. He excuses himself.
Fast forward to the next bar, we dance and dance and dance. We grab a drink and headed back to the dance floor with her. This guy tries to grab his friend as we were walking by. Spills my drink. My fvcking water on the rocks. He looks at me. His buddy looks at me. Cue in Cowboy Fastdraw theme song. Skyy quick draws. So, you are going to get me another drink? He looks at his buddies. They look back at him. Squint eyes all around. Reputation was on the line for the gladiators, I held that fvcking eye contact. 5 seconds of silence. 5 seconds of my nutsack shriveling. He reaches for his wallet. Staying calm while almost jizzing in my pants I reluctantly accept his irrelevant $10.
Sit down with asian chick and she tells me her feet hurt. I tell her, that's fine we can hang out at my place. She rejects and says her apartment was closer. My deep hidden reaction.
Her name was Julie.
Saw an asian chick waiting in line with the massive c0ckfest at the bar area. I simply told her HEY, you got looks, I got money. Lets grab drinks! Fvck it. I grabbed her waist and pushed her toward the front of the line, through the massive sea of sausages. It was so packed that her t!ts were rubbing against my 6/10 pecs. The feels man. Yes we got our drink and came back to the couch area. Intense conversation with her making out with me. The feels man. I told her that I wanted to drink more, but prices were expensive. Let's bar hop. She agrees. I-S-O-L-A-T-I-O-N.
I use the bathroom and run into long time friend, Beta Bob. This mofo chats my god damn ear out. Jesus Christ. I needed to gracefully excuse myself. 'Hey man, you're awesome, but I need my d!ck sucked tonight.' He gives me a brofist and his Beta Blessings.
I come back to the chick and she was getting hit on by another dood. He is feeding her a DOUBLE SHOT. Okay. I know her tolerance level and this can not be happening. This is that shot that goes over the top. This was the last shot. This was the fvcking c0ckblock shot.
GIF of what I wanted to do
I had the greatest decision of my Friday Night. Either slither back in the sea of orbiters and find other options, OR AMOG the fvck out of this dude. (See: Productive C0ckblocking)
I introduce myself and he said his name was Aaron. Whayyylennn? I said. No. It's Aaron. Oh. Guy is like 4 inches taller than me with hostile tendencies. Let me diffuse this situation - I put my leg on asian chicks' and she put her hand on it. Fight awkwardness with offensive awkwardness. Fvck it, this piece of meat is mine. He excuses himself.
Fast forward to the next bar, we dance and dance and dance. We grab a drink and headed back to the dance floor with her. This guy tries to grab his friend as we were walking by. Spills my drink. My fvcking water on the rocks. He looks at me. His buddy looks at me. Cue in Cowboy Fastdraw theme song. Skyy quick draws. So, you are going to get me another drink? He looks at his buddies. They look back at him. Squint eyes all around. Reputation was on the line for the gladiators, I held that fvcking eye contact. 5 seconds of silence. 5 seconds of my nutsack shriveling. He reaches for his wallet. Staying calm while almost jizzing in my pants I reluctantly accept his irrelevant $10.
Sit down with asian chick and she tells me her feet hurt. I tell her, that's fine we can hang out at my place. She rejects and says her apartment was closer. My deep hidden reaction.
Her name was Julie.
