"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Kissed Her, Then Ran Away, What Is Wrong With Me?

buddy6504

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Haha, I feel like I'm way too old/experienced to pull a move like this, but I did anyways. I guess it makes me an AFC. Any help any of the DJs around here could give me would be great.

So here's the one quick background fact you have to know to understand this story: I'm 22. I've been in two serious LTRs in my life, and had many other short relationships/dating partners. EVERY SINGLE ONE of these women, either during the relationship (with the long ones) or sometime after if/when we became friends (with the short ones) has told me "You know, I had no idea you liked me until you made a really strong move, like kissed me or asked me out on a date clarifying it was as more than friends." I don't know what it is about my approach, but I guess I play my cards really close to my chest. With several of these women, I thought I was making my intentions for them extremely obvious for weeks or even months before we got together, but all of them have sworn (and I believe them) that I'm just too subtle until I do something big. So anyways-

Just got out of one of those LTRs. Decide I need to get back out on the dating scene. Just started grad school, where I met this fun/hot girl in my class. She's probably an 8 or a 9 but is definitely single. So long story short, over the course of the first few weeks of school, we meet, get to know each other, and she starts demonstrating extreme high levels of interest in me. I start flirtatiously (or so I thought, anyways... that's why I put that intro about me playing my cards too close up there) doing the same back to her, responding to texts, visiting her apartment to say hi, etc. I figure, fvck it, she's hot, she's giving me all these signs, so I'm going to do something about it. She had mentioned a while ago that she wanted to watch a movie with me at her place sometime. So I initiate contact and set this up. I offer to bring food for us to eat. I'm thinking, obviously this chick has to know that I'm trying to get with her. So we do the whole movie date thing, we're not really cuddling while watching it, but we're sitting pretty close. I have to go somewhere once the movie is over, she doesn't want me to leave, but I say I have to. I get up, go to her door, put on my shoes, like I'm ready to leave. She's standing there, kind of close to me. So I figure, I gotta go for it now. I step over and kiss her. I pull back and she says "Wow... that was unexpected." But she's smiling, and she grabs me and goes in for more. We had to start and stop a few times, but it lasted probably 20 or 30 seconds. Then... here's the AFC part...

I don't know why I did this. Maybe because I've been out of the game for 2.5 years due to my LTR or something. But I was really shocked that she was surprised by the kiss, and shocked that she (supposedly) didn't think I was into her. So I pull back from the last kiss, and throw open the door, say "Talk to you later!" And basically run off. Not literally running, but, you know, hurrying away. It was awkward as hell. The last thing I heard was her laughing through the door. Saw her the next day (yesterday) and said hi and she said hi but that was it. No calls, no texts. So, if you've read this far, my questions are this:

1. I want to get with this girl, but I'm worried now she sees me as an AFC because of how I reacted to the kiss. Should I go for it, and start stepping up the contact, asking for dates, etc., or should I back off and see if she pursues me?
2. This is less important, but honestly, what the hell is wrong with me? What am I, a chick? I used to have game... was a DJ Forum regular about 5 years ago when I was in high school... apparently I lost it over time or something. I dunno. I'm really just concerned with question #1.

Thanks for your time!
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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