Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Keeping intrest level up

BYPS

Don Juan
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Alright guys,

I've got the girl, she said I've got her hooked, my question is, What can I do to keep her interest level up?

I'd like to thank all of you guys out there also, because I've changed how I act with girls now, and am much more successful, and not just with the girls I'm going after, I am a much better person around all girls now. So if I can do it, so can you. Now answer my question, haha

-BYPS
 

Flirterpro

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You must be CONFIDENT!!!
That means that she should NEVER get the impression that you NEED her. If she does you can be sure that you will lose her, because she will know that she can control you, that she can do anything and that she doesn't need to respect you. We all know that women ONLY love confident guys!
Guys who respect themselfs!
So be confident, DON'T GET JEALOUS, and don't be insecure in any sort!

Of course you should also be honnest. Because only if a girl can trust you she can love you! So don't lie, treat her with respect and don't play any games!

Another thing you should be is flexible! That means that you should do things you won't normally do just to please her (f.e. If she wants to go to a party and you don't like this party you should go there anyway).
(WARNING: Flexibility doesn't mean that you should do anything for her, but you should show her that you want to make her happy by pleasing her)

Beside of being honnest and confident and flexible there is nothing special you can do but BEING YOURSELF! If her interest level is high it is because she finds you attractive and because she likes your personality. You can't pretend that you are more funny, more exciting, etc. than you actually are, because she would find this out...




------------------
"You must understand women
if you want to succeed with
them!"
 

tomazu

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hallo!

as far as I understand to keep the interest level up you have to be a challenge!

doc love always writes about 3 Cs.. confidence, challenge and (self-)control! where most guys are lacking is challenge! how to be a challenge? dont tell her every little secret about you, always keep her guessing a little! if she tests you dont put up with her disrespect and get her ass in place immediatly!

this means you will not call her everyday and you will not stay on the phone for hours! this also means you watch her closely, you "monitor" her interest level.. dont get obsessed over it, but you must asset where you are!

hey AD you're the IL expert, where are you :-D ?

--> read the other post on "upping her IL", I answered some things already there!

ciao tomazu


[This message has been edited by tomazu (edited 08-18-2000).]
 

Anti-Dump

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One way is to make sure you talk to her in person MOST of the time. Keep phone talk under an hour. Rarely talk on the phone.

She has to see you in person, or she will be 'without' you. If you limit the phone and stop E-mails and limit messages, she will WANT you more. Her interest will rise or stay high. She will wonder where you are and what you are doing.

Another way is to not give her any flowers, cards, or gifts for the first two months. But you must kiss her and show affection at the same time.

This will cause her to wonder about you. You are loving yet buy nothing. Most guys give gifts and flowers. She will be very curious about this. She will think your love is genuine because you are not trying to buy her love.

But the main thing is to tell her nothing about yourself. If she asks a personal question just answer very vaguely. Use one word answers. This is only about YOU. Don't talk like that.

Her: What do you like to do?
You: Lot's of things.
Her: What do you think about girls who wear tight clothes?
You: Sometimes I look. Sometimes I don't.

Then ask her questions back to take the focus off you.

Just don't tell her too much about your personal view point too fast. Have fun for the first two months. IF she is still around in eight weeks then you can tell her more about yourself.

The whole idea is that she should just like to be with you regardless of your opinions. She should like your style, not your feelings in the first two months.
Your feelings are none of her business until she shows she likes your style FIRST.

Anti-Dump
 

Devlar

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NONONONONONO!

Mystery is a sham, granted if your looking for fast-love mystery will work quite nicely but if your looking for something more long-term mystery will just leave you lonely.

Originally posted by Anti-Dump:
Another way is to not give her any flowers, cards, or gifts for the first two months.
No, this is called being cheap. All it does is makes her compare you to every other looser she's ever been out with

Originally posted by Anti-Dump:
But the main thing is to tell her nothing about yourself. If she asks a personal question just answer very vaguely. Use one word answers. This is only about YOU. Don't talk like that.
Relationships are based on communication, if you're not compatable for each other this technique will only draw out the inevidible dump. It can only work if both of you have compatible, this means core values, interests and ideals. No comunication and there is no relationship.

Originally posted by Anti-Dump:
The whole idea is that she should just like to be with you regardless of your opinions.
Which solves the enigma of why so many people get divorced in this country. If you don't share opinions, and all those other things with your partner your as good as gone.


On a final note, I'm not disputing that some of this stuff doesn't work OVERALL.

Most likely if your just looking for quick sex this is the road for you but...

The problem is from the percpective of someone seeking a decent relationship they're devestating.

------------------
Devlar

Remember its hard to be a gentileman, but that doesn't mean it's not fun

[This message has been edited by Devlar (edited 08-19-2000).]
 

Anti-Dump

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BYPS,

My suggestions must really work if a nice guy like Devlar hates them with a passion.

Look at that 'No,No,No,No,No'!
Boy, you must be on to something very good if he is opposed to it THAT much.

Anti-Dump
 

Ko-B

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AD, just to let you know your reply was VERY HELPFUL in my situation. but i am not looking for a long-term relationship. i want someone i can have fun wit for 2-3 months, after that, that's it. i will not tie myself down with anyone, ya kno? so do u think after 2 months of playin around, and a month of seriousness, it'd be all good to break up gradually?
 

Crazyman

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For a start grow some balls and strike out for your own destiny. don't follow someones rules just becuase they are rules(this includes your own rules. Be able to think on your feet.
Be adventerous/spontaneous no girl like being bored.
Have a little jealousy too much is bad and so is none.
A bit of flexibilty but not too much don't do everything she wants or you will end up "under the thumb"

If you have a similar set of values and oppinions that will help.
Stick to your values and don't be easily influenced.
As for giving gifts do it when appropriate (birthdays ets) You can do the spontaneous gift giving later.

Match her discloures with disclosures of your own, this promotes a feeling of closeness.

This is if you are after a relationship but if you want a quick screw. either way what ever you are after JUST BE YOURSELF.

------------------
(24)
Fear is seductive.
Don`t let it be the love of your life
 

Devlar

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Originally posted by Anti-Dump:
BYPS,

My suggestions must really work if a nice guy like Devlar hates them with a passion.

Look at that 'No,No,No,No,No'!
Boy, you must be on to something very good if he is opposed to it THAT much.

Anti-Dump

I don't hate suggestions, I hate stupid people that try to **** with other's minds.

'nuff said



------------------
Devlar

Remember its hard to be a gentileman, but that doesn't mean it's not fun
 

Vienna Sausage

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Well from personal experience I shall share something. When I first started dating this girl (who is now my gf for 3 months) I avoided gifts and didnt tell her sappy things such as, "you are so perfect, blah blah blah." I was confident, remained a challenge, and subtlely hinted that she could be replaced. I was not needy at all. I made things fun and made sure she had a good time.

Now we have been dating for 3 months. I personally did not follow AD's advice as I bought her a beautiful gift for our 1 and 3 month anniversary and she got me one for our 2 month. Also, I did talk about myself and did not keep things vague. (HOWEVER, I did not talk about the time I wet my bed when I was 3, etc.) I talked about my ambitions, interests, goals, etc. She was really turned on to that. She said I am motivated and intelligent, and that is a huge turn on. At the same time, I made her talk as well. The ratio right now is about 60/40 her. I also talk to her every day and for about 2 hours. She is in high school though, phone time is important for high school girls. Anyway, the point is, I havent followed AD's advice after we started a relationship and now her interest level is in the mid 90's (I am positive) She even slipped the other day talking about "our" children and marriage. So AD's advice is probably good to get the girl but once you are in, you cant be so cold. IMHO
 
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