Just friends - classic AFC- or not!

[Magnanimus]

Hi everybody, here is my quandary:

Young, single -for 3 years ‘apparently’- HB9 insists she’s not interested but ‘friends is cool’.

Now, we’ve had a bit of a chat and I know the reasons for this (she is damaged goods from a previous heart-rending relationship + intends moving out of the country.

My looks and skills are way above average… so I take this one a little to heart!
She didn’t respond favourably to the initial sexually aggressive ‘no-strings’ approach –which I thought was the obvious way to go.

The DJ in me says ‘Horses for courses.. I need to adapt my style a bit here! she knows she is vulnerable to a player, but *****-shield is WAY up.

Now, Am I truly DJ in considering to trying to win her trust as a ‘friend’ in order to seduce or am I deluded and falling into the classic AFC trap…it’s a fine line to tread.

I intend to go with ‘friends’ route –if only for the challenge and to work out how to press her buttons- I mean that in the nicest possible way.

I imagine many a DJ has pulled this off. Any advice fellas ?

 

[organizedconfusion]

what do your instincts tell you to do?
your gut reaction is usually the right choice

 

[Tyron]

I don't think deception/lying is the way to go. Of course it would matter how you will do it but if you say "im going to be a friend" then that's what you will be in my opinion. good luck!

 

[Magnanimus]

My gut says 'Dont be a chump and give up like ***** at the first sign of a knock-back'.

I certainly dont see it as lieing.. i am prepared to be her freind and f***-buddy But the road between now and that time is a precarious one, once the dreaded 'friend' word is mentioned!

 

[Tyron]

ya I do agree with upper post. My point is that you don't (shouldnt imo, not my game) present false sense of reality for her. If you both know where you are at, friends and f*** buddies, why not. But if she considers you a friend while you are making your evil masterplan to get her laid, that's wrong. Now Im not the most ethical person and that's not the reason I say this but rather it can screw up more things than it probably will accomplish.

edit: But if that's your game, just getting them laid by resorting to lies. I quess you could lie to them. That's not my game however.

 

[Magnanimus]

Yes, i see your point. I dont like hurting people either; What goes around, comes around. I aim to make our friendship a life enriching and pleasurable experience for her Tyron

 

[organizedconfusion]

Originally posted by Tyron
ya I do agree with upper post. My point is that you don't (shouldnt imo, not my game) present false sense of reality for her. If you both know where you are at, friends and f*** buddies, why not. But if she considers you a friend while you are making your evil masterplan to get her laid, that's wrong. Now Im not the most ethical person and that's not the reason I say this but rather it can screw up more things than it probably will accomplish.

edit: But if that's your game, just getting them laid by resorting to lies. I quess you could lie to them. That's not my game however.

YES, exactly...


dude,if you are friends with a girl straight up-
she WILL take things to the next level and you would'nt have to
lift a finger or say a word.If the attraction is powerfull that's all it
takes. Trying too hard, kills things.Thats why i myself prefer the
tease & run method..because it causes HER to give chase and initiate.


besides, just interacting with a woman will help you understand
them more.If anything i'd say just the experiance of being around
her often is WAY more valuable then just getting laid- in terms of
gaining overall confidence and insight into a woman.
that comfort ,confidence ,wisdom colors all future relationships with woman.

 

[jmeredi]

Having attractive female friends isn't AFC. It's definitley good practice and helps you test your personal boundaries.

 

[flexion_]

For a woman to insist she is not interested means she really is not interested. I'm not a big fan of the purposeful deception either - and it won't work - she just told you she isn't interested.

When I woman has to flat out tell you that then you already have missed the broadside of the barn with all her subtle hints leading up to this.