TheWayOfAllFlesh said:
I always get my work done
I love my sports team with a dying passion
I have a fantastic and open taste in music
I have a family who'd do anything for my well being
I'm employable
I can learn things easily
I'm definitely going to be at University next year
I'm definitely attractive
I stand true to my spiritualistic beliefs
My opinions are better than everyone else's until proven otherwise
Yayy
That's great man. Keep making a list of your good qualities. When you get down, visit this list.
The next thing to do is to list all of the things you are grateful for. From your job, to your friends, to your family to the clothes on your back, to having food and water and a roof over your head. You have to feel honest appreciation for what you have. You have a lot more than 90% of the worlds population if you live in a major western country and you have unlimited opportunities. Make that list and feel grateful for your good fortune.
All of this is working on your inner game and how you see yourself. You have to build yourself up first on the inside before you go to the outside. Read up in the dj bible on inner game. This will boost your confidence.
The next step after the inner game work is the outer game. Getting in the gym, getting some nice clothes, nice shoes, keeping well groomed, whiten your teeth if you need to..all that little physical stuff. Fixing what you can fix and minimizing what you can't change. This will boost your confidence even more.
Then work on your social skills. Working on interacting with people in a pleasant way. How to meet people, have a conversation. Be engaging and funny. Join groups and organizations on campus or around town. Find things you like to do and do them. Meet other people who are into that same stuff. expand your social circle.
Spend time with your family and friends. They keep you centered and grounded and getting love and respect from people you know always makes you feel better. Appreciate them while you have them because family is forever until they aren't there anymore, know what I mean?
Then start worrying about girls. I don't mean put girls on pause, if you see something you want go for it, but don't make it your focus, building your life is your focus. But after you feel like your life is going in the direction you want and you're feeling good about yourself and your life, go and have fun met girls, go to parties, go clubbing, learn how to dance...enjoy yourself with girls. Just don't lose focus on the rest of your life. That's where most guys mess up. They get a girl and the rest of their life goes to hell.
It's a process to picking yourself up, dusting yourself off and getting back in the game. Don't think it will happen over night. But enjoy the process.
You've proved to us and more importantly to yourself that you can change your mindset if you try...now it's time to put in the work and make it permanent. Remember we all have dark times, we just have to fight through them. I've been going through some myself lately, time to shake it off and make it happen. Anyway. Good luck man.
