Is this situation recoverable?

[boatdrinks]

I went out with a girl two nights ago. We met online. Anyway at the end of the date, I told her I liked her. The next day I called her to tell her Iiked her. And to make it worse, I sent her an email to tell her I liked her. In retrospect, I can't believe my stupidity, but heh, I wasn't aware of this site until today.

She hasn't responsed to my email. Previously she used to respond straight away. So I know that I have screwed up royally by coming on too strong. However, if the situation can re resurrected, I would like to do so.

During the date, we made plans to meet up next Saturday (a week away). Assuming she makes no contact at all, should I call her up say on Friday, to finalise arrangements. My natural instinct would be to call earlier, but if I hold off calling Friday hopefully I won't come across as too needy.

However, it may be that I have done too much damage already. Would I be better off not calling at all, so she wonders where I got to, which might provoke contact. However, as we made plans, would I be screwing up further, by being rude and just not contacting her again.

Any advice would be appreciated.

 

[TizZle]

Man I think you broke a lot of rules already. Although you might be able to salvage the situation. Everyone is different but I think you might have rubbed her the wrong way. Don't convey that you like a girl through words at the beginning i believe you are suppose to make a move on her. Maybe put your arm around her while walking her out to the car after the date or something. Second date you may try a kiss if things are going well and u have her on a high. I think you went way to far when u said that you liked her so many times. Chances are she has seen this before and burnt guys for it. Making plans during the date for another date.... Dates are suppose to be fun not like a business meeting... I believe you came off as desparate maybe already.. just my 2 cents.. Maybe someone else can chime in with some advice im pretty new here and to the DJ scene.

 

[Adrian]

Pretty bad fvck up. Don't ever call her again. I doubt that she will call you back but don't put so much into just this one girl. Go after more girls and make sure to not come of as strong as you did with your previous one. For the time bieng just read the bible and study it and adapt to the DJ ways. If she calls back good. You might have a chance to redeem yourself but make sure to play it cool this time! She should be the one geting all mushy. not you! To sum it all down just play it cool, remain true to yourself and adapt some DJism into yourself.

 

[Kaine]

*Ouch* You really shat on yourself with that one. I hope you rocked her world on your date, that would certainly help.

I would certainly pull back on this one if I couldn't find some way to tell that I was drunk at the time and actually thinking of a new car purchase.

In this case assuming you already both agreed on a saturday date. Just don't contact her and assume its still on.

IF you really hadn't finalised all the details with her, then send her a email to get the job done to do just that.

No more mushy claptrap, maybe a little ****y and funny to give yourself a bit more value and her to forget how much of a prize you think she is.

Its not over yet, give her one more chance to get with you!

 

[Joe The Homophobe]

don't call her again! you will chip away at your dignity once you call her and she don't call back.

 

[Adrian]

Don't think about how she "might" be giving you another chance. You may just be holding on to false expetations. Move on bud. If she calls then it's cool. If she doesn't call Thats still cool. There are too many girls out there to just be hooked on to just one.

 

[boatdrinks]

Thanks for the advice guys.

This site has been a godsend. I always used to wonder why chicks I didn't like and ignored were always calling me and ones that I tried to woo desperately gave me the cold shoulder. I put it down to bad luck but now know otherwise.

I am dating someone else tonight, so I am not too concerned about the "one who got away". Will apply DJ principals on the new girl.

 

[Sg]

Never hold all hopes because you have one phone number.
Always keep looking until its setteled that you and her are a set item.
Theres still hope though.
on your next date NEVER ask if she got your emails, phone messages, ect. Then she thinks your desperate. Pretend they never happened and have fun on the date.
Worrying over wether or not she got your messages or not doesnt make you feel better does it?
Screw it, wait until the day of the date, then call.
If she wont return your call, then load her machine with messages until the memory chip blows stating your profound love for her over and over so she brags to her friends.
Then one of the other Djs on the board will get ahold of her and break that f*ckin ego right off!

Good luck buddy..

-sg

 

[-HPNOTIQ-]

First...NEVER under any circumstances tell a woman "I LIKE YOU". That's something a 3rd grader tells the girl he has a crush on. You come off as a little boy. If you want to make your intentions known..be subtle. "I feel some chemistry here" or "I think we click" are easy fishing terms to see where she stands when it comes to what direction you guys are going..LTR, dating, or FB mode.

Want to recover from this situation?

Honestly, if you call her a couple days before the date and comfirm, you may come off as needy after firing away those emails and voice messeges.

If you wait til the day of the date, you risk her assuming since you didn't call to confirm, that she didn't expect the date was still on.

F'd up senerio.

First, you have to lose the one-itis bro. Second, you need to do some damage control. From your emails and messages, you're comming off as a needy boy. You need to pull away from the situation.

If she hasn't called you within a couple days before the date to confirm with you, I'd call her. Whether she answers or you leave a messege, CANCEL THE DATE.

Tell her you can't make the date because you have prior arrangements you can't get out of. By cancelling the date, YOU took command and show her that she's not the priority in YOUR life she thinks she is. From there, keep some distance...stop the mushy phone calls, stop the mushy emails, stop being SO DAMN NEEDY.

Do this correctly and she will wonder what happened to your IL in her..and if she is genuinely interested in you...she'll do whatever she can to gain your interest back.

If she doesn't try to get ahold of you after you pulling away...then all that mushy AFC emails and messeges you gave ruined her IL in you...in that event...NEXT HER and learn from your mistakes.