Is Self Improvement the Path to Success?

[LegendBoy]

We have two legions in this joint.

One is Self Improvement to become a man of value and the rest falls into place with obvious action which would come easier and if you believe yourself to have a higher value

Then we have the tricks/formulaes/tactics and trying to gain interest level and people who think its about lifting your game and you will pull chicks.. Usually these people are after the quick fix and this does work sometimes..

I am in the self improvement category, I mean why try getting chicks who are hotter then you, smarter then you, richer then you when your just going to feel insecure? Constantly question yourself and if your good enough. And constantly needing validation from them such as a good night or good morning message.

I am not advocating a particular path for anyone but I just am interested in what paths you's are on and ultimately what that path will bring you in the LONG TERM..

I believe being a man of value means pulling the good chicks and keeping them without insecurity if it falls through your a man of value right? You can pick up another one.

Be a PUA then you have some tricks and it might work then you lose her then your all upset and trying to use your fake game on the next chick. Its a never ending cycle which ultimately doesn't improve you.. Just you keep bruising your ego and trying to mend it.

Discuss...

 

[Demon]

I think my article is a good description of my path.

 

[aelux]

Ugh this post gives me a headache. It sounds like your poon whipped. I'll take these one by one.

We have two legions in this joint.

One is Self Improvement to become a man of value and the rest falls into place with obvious action which would come easier and if you believe yourself to have a higher value

Wrong, those two paths form a double helix with the product, us, resting in the center. Those obvious actions you talk about are not obvious at all.

Then we have the tricks/formulaes/tactics and trying to gain interest level and people who think its about lifting your game and you will pull chicks.. Usually these people are after the quick fix and this does work sometimes..

Actually it works 100% of the time if you follow the game to a t. Fortunately we are not robots to follow a script perfectly.

I am in the self improvement category, I mean why try getting chicks who are hotter then you, smarter then you, richer then you when your just going to feel insecure? Constantly question yourself and if your good enough. And constantly needing validation from them such as a good night or good morning message.

Better sex? The feeling of victory after a successful conquest? If you feel insecure without an average chick by your side that is your problem.

I am not advocating a particular path for anyone but I just am interested in what paths you's are on and ultimately what that path will bring you in the LONG TERM..

It would bear mentioning that Mystery, the progenitor of some of these methods has in fact gotten happily married to a beautiful and emotionally independant woman.

I believe being a man of value means pulling the good chicks and keeping them without insecurity if it falls through your a man of value right? You can pick up another one.

Right

Be a PUA then you have some tricks and it might work then you lose her then your all upset and trying to use your fake game on the next chick. Its a never ending cycle which ultimately doesn't improve you.. Just you keep bruising your ego and trying to mend it.

Fake game? Bro the emotions that you make a chick feel are as real as it gets. And consequently so are the emotions you feel. Long term, I see a lot of AFCs with huge potential with an ugly chick becuase they didn't develop their game. If you want this to happen to you by all means be a "true man" but if you want to game women - and make they happy because they love the game - read on.

 

[LegendBoy]

Ugh this post gives me a headache. It sounds like your poon whipped. I'll take these one by one
Wrong, those two paths form a double helix with the product, us, resting in the center. Those obvious actions you talk about are not obvious at all.

Okay you have a point there but PUA is NOT the life you can live for ever self improvement DJ is.

Actually it works 100% of the time if you follow the game to a t. Fortunately we are not robots to follow a script perfectly.

No it doesn't if I was to meet up with you I doubt you could pick up girls 100% of the time. Tricks don't mean **** unless your picking up HoE$$.. A girl when she sees you already has her mind BASICALLY made up if she is interested or not. Tricks dont do much

Better sex? The feeling of victory after a successful conquest? If you feel insecure without an average chick by your side that is your problem.

Feeling victory after sexual conquest? Is this a war? I think not.. I think ANYONE will feel insecure if the chick they are with has better options then them it is natural. That is why you bring yourself up a notch and seperate yourself from the crowd.

It would bear mentioning that Mystery, the progenitor of some of these methods has in fact gotten happily married to a beautiful and emotionally independant woman.

For every mystery there another 1000 people who are not mystery

Right

Cool

Fake game? Bro the emotions that you make a chick feel are as real as it gets. And consequently so are the emotions you feel. Long term, I see a lot of AFCs with huge potential with an ugly chick becuase they didn't develop their game. If you want this to happen to you by all means be a "true man" but if you want to game women - and make they happy because they love the game - read on.

Emotions shouldn't be the catalyst for our actions. Thats a chick thing. I never said be an AFC I just said self improvement in my opinion is the way to success with woman, maybe not in quantity but surely in managing your emotions and you will less likely to be attached as you confidence in picking up again.

 

[belividere]

One of the biggest things drawing me to this site is that no matter what the method people choose they are still out there doing. They may be motivated to do something about their weight, or about their social skills, or about their job or school. The common bond here tends to be action vs inaction.

The division of people usually occurs over motives. There is the group that improves themselves to achieve the best possible self. Then there is the group that is changing for validation or supplication. I've always enjoyed the threads about the self vs pickup. I am confident and comfortable with my skills in those areas so I dont find much use to change there. When I first started taking the steps to better my life though a few things I did where specifically to attract women. Those were the first things that I ended up giving up on. Still I'm glad that I did them and came to that realization as it was a good stepping stone for my self-development.

 

[aelux]

Okay you have a point there but PUA is NOT the life you can live for ever self improvement DJ is.

Eh imho the difference between a PUA and a DJ is an issue of semantics.

No it doesn't if I was to meet up with you I doubt you could pick up girls 100% of the time. Tricks don't mean **** unless your picking up HoE$$.. A girl when she sees you already has her mind BASICALLY made up if she is interested or not. Tricks dont do much

Without a doubt I'm still in the works, but I don't use myself as example of an experienced PUA/DJ because I'm not. BUT and experienced PUA/DJ can close with a remarkable success rate. Unfortunately the type of study that would give me some statistics to back this up would be unpopular with certain groups. Even the hottest women want attention from guys they think are attractive.

Feeling victory after sexual conquest? Is this a war? I think not.. I think ANYONE will feel insecure if the chick they are with has better options then them it is natural. That is why you bring yourself up a notch and seperate yourself from the crowd.

No it's not a war but it is a conflict and I definately feel strong feelings of satisfaction when I fuk a hb. Bring yourself up a notch? Do tell...

For every mystery there another 1000 people who are not mystery

True but at least 200 people of that 1000 have the potential to improve on themselves and begin gaming. Not everyone will be Keith Moon but that doesn't stop kids from drumming.

Emotions shouldn't be the catalyst for our actions. Thats a chick thing. I never said be an AFC I just said self improvement in my opinion is the way to success with woman, maybe not in quantity but surely in managing your emotions and you will less likely to be attached as you confidence in picking up again.

They might not ought to be but they are. Emotions are information, nothing more, nothing less. Complex, intriguing, frustrating information. We think and feel, and think based on our feelings, then feel about our thoughts - another double helix with the symbiosis of thought and emotion resting in the center. Inextricably connected yet seperate.

Anyway, self improvement is cool, def didn't say it wasn't. Just don't underestimate the skill factor. An untrained drummer might be a wonderful person but he still is not a good drummer... but could be.

 

[LegendBoy]

For some being a PUA just doesn't come natural thus the path of DJ allows them to mold themselves while taking opportunities as they arise.

EG I wouldn't cold approach in a mall because you do not know anything about the girl sluttt, hoee, *****hh, AW, married, WHo the **** knows.. Unlesss she fitted the description of my dream girl.. Which I only ever saw once...

But Self Improvement is exceptionally important.. Anyone who has improved majorly shed light on this and tell me if it rubbed off in regards to woman????

 

[everywomanshero]

The two paths are really not as different as you might think.

Swinggcat in Real World Seduction says to have women rate you and to try different hairstyles and clothing to see what gets you the best ratings. He also suggests changing your underlying belief system to one more conducive to success with women. This is all a sort of self-improvement that will help in other areas of life also... ie dress better and have more confidence == better job prospects, more friends, etc.

Mystery in VAH advocates forming an identity (know who you are and don't be afraid to show it in a way that people (including you) can respect), dressing better, and fixing bad belief systems, working out, eating welll, and creating a financial plan that is the best you possibly can. This is all self-improvement also.

The problem is that people have this idea that there is this magic PUA line that will "trick" women into dropping their panties and doing them right then and there. Unfortunately, that's not the case which is why basicallly every successful PUA in existance recommends self-improvement. Self-improvement and getting to a point where at least some chicks are naturally attracted in just step #1. Mystery Method is really designed for guys who want to go beyond that, if that's not you, then you probably don't want to waste a lot of time that is required to use MM effectively.

 

[Jariel]

I don't want to spend my time convincing chicks I'm something great when I am only average, or go chasing after women like some desperate loser, acting out little gimmicks, rehearsed jokes or tricks like a court jester. And I don't want to be paying $1000's on seduction programs by nerds for nerds only to find that they don't actually work effectively.

I'm not content just to get a hot woman to accept me. I want to walk into a room and know that I'm the best man in there. I want to feel like everyone is looking up to me, that the girls want to be with me and the guys want to be me. When I am with a girl I want her to feel lucky, for her to get flustered when I talk to her and for her knees to tremble when I kiss her. I want to be successful in life and be able to handle challenges that come my way, and I want to make the most of my potential for my own satisfaction and pride.

That's why I am an advocate of self-improvement and that's why I am well above average.

 

[LegendBoy]

The above poster summed up my original opinion. That self improvement is important in making you TRUELY a man of value. Yeh you can fake it and pick chicks up and keep needing validation. But when you get dropped by a chick and your NOT improving how have your progressed in your life?

Put it this way self improvement means knowing you are the Sh!T not acting like your the ****. Big difference. Knowing your the Sh!T after self improvement(which never stops) means being rejected isn't a rejection if you BELIEVE you are great. Because you have another chance at another girl. Being dumped doesn't mean as much as you are a man of value. You can take risks because your ego isn't fragile and needing validation like the non improving tactics/formulae guy.

 

[comic_relief]

Self-improvement, but couldn't we do both at the same time?

I chose for the self-improvement path.

click on the link in my sig to see what it got me.

comic_relief

 

[aelux]

Like I said, self-improvement and skills are in a ying-yang relationship. You can have one without the other but your success rate will be dramatically lowered if you do not focus on both.

Focusing only on self-improvement can easily lead you to be the nice-guy AFC without the confidence that practicing pickups provides.

Focusing only on pickups and closing can lead you to do a lot of chasing and not much closing.

I too choose to improve myself, but part of that improvement is improving my dating skills. Getting a girl to smile on a cold pickup is a reward I wouldn't have gotten unless I went out and tried the pickups.

 

[DJinTraining06]

Well self improvement def cant be a bad thing. But why is it that AFC's (myself i admit) r so worried bout improving. There are some real ******* alpha male shltheads that prob havent read a book in yrs, or done anything to imporve themselves. They just act like themselves and still get all the women. I dont think self improvement is the prob. U dont need to know how to play an instrument and be a black belt and read 500 books etc etc. Those r all god things, but is that really the prob? i dont think so. They get the girls from confidence right?