In a bind!

[shiguldo]

What would you do if your parent and a girl's parent tries to hook you up together? It sounds like no problem if we both like each other but the situation has escalated to the point where my dad goes ahead of himself and tells them BS like I'm willing to marry, date, etc.

On the girl's side, her future brother in law is all willing/receptive and has also tried to indirectly ask about my feeling and make me feel comfortable with him.
I currently privately teach English in Japan and he has set up lessons with me and that girl before I found out about the whole scheme.

The girl herself supposedly told my dad she's not that interested in learning, but to me she gives me tons of reason why she wants to learn. Also she brings snacks, and drinks to the lesson and is very nice. We've been family friend for years and she works as a waitress (was real nice to us when we visited her restaurant.)

Meanwhile, her relative have done all this and she has acted as if nothing has happened. I tried to prod some response by apologizing for my dad's call/behavior but she laughed it off. I then asked to change the lesson's location to a coffee shop and she agreed. Originally I taught her in a private room attached to the family restaurant that she works for.

I've known / read this forum for years so I'm aware of the AFC stuff but I can't read this girl's feeling and I'm in a bind. The girl's brother in-law is getting married to her older sister and he has invited me to his wedding, which is coming up too.

I wonder how I should handle this. The girl is dateable but I'm not willing to take it further if it means that I'll have further consequence and I have no idea what the girl really feels behind her veil of pleasant attitude because we semi know each other as family friends.

 

[shiguldo]

Update:

I'm sorry to bother you guys again. I know my problem is trivial but my dad is seriously setting me up for further trouble.

He's already calling this girl his future "daughter in law" and they've supposedly been talking to each other. I have no idea whats going on.

So the bottomline is , should I just burn bridge or try to salvage it?
I plan to try to call her and apologize for my dad's behavior and make it
clear that my dad's behavior has nothing to do with me.

 

[seano99]

Update:

I'm sorry to bother you guys again. I know my problem is trivial but my dad is seriously setting me up for further trouble.

He's already calling this girl his future "daughter in law" and they've supposedly been talking to each other. I have no idea whats going on.

So the bottomline is , should I just burn bridge or try to salvage it?
I plan to try to call her and apologize for my dad's behavior and make it
clear that my dad's behavior has nothing to do with me.

hey man im getting advice on another thread so though i'd try to return the favour to someone.

i think there is no problem with you and her here man, you haven't outlined her thoughts on your situation tho. if you like the girl, play it aloof and maybe say at an appropriate point, "man my dad is always so overbearing.. he means well but gee isnt he just too much?".

that distances you from his actions, and shows to her u dont care, that you're not over analyzing it.

then forget about it. if you dont like her, then cut her loose, or make her a plate..

then have a quiet word to ur dad over a beer or something equally neutral or relaxing just let him know u appreciate his support, but he's not helping.

just a small spot fire, dont stress