I will never get why people say it was easier in high school and college.

[drakeisfire]

You had to be on a sports team and be the star athlete, some popular kid with rich parents or some rich frat boy in college to get the better looking girls. Most girls were obsessed with what your status was and what crowds you ran with rather than how good you looked or how tight your game was. If you were not going to bother with the nonsense social politics or the status games, it is like most of the good looking girls were out of the question.

 

[bigdave17]

You had to be on a sports team and be the star athlete, some popular kid with rich parents or some rich frat boy in college to get the better looking girls. Most girls were obsessed with what your status was and what crowds you ran with rather than how good you looked or how tight your game was. If you were not going to bother with the nonsense social politics or the status games, it is like most of the good looking girls were out of the question.

are you drunk or high?

You're in classes all the time with hot girls and super easy introductions. You go to parties all the time where you can easily meet hot girls

If you think picking up a girl that you go to class with everyday is harder than randomly cold approaching a stranger at a mall, you were dropped on your head as a child over and over again.

Let's be honest here, if you were a decent looking dude, in good shape, had some friends - you were automatically part of the "cool crowd". It's not like the opposite of that works in your late 20s. Between looks/money/social circle/lifestyle, I'm in the top 0.01% of men my age - I still get zero interest from hotties.

 

[bigdave17]

g

Once upon a time, during my sophomore year in HS , I was sitting home one day eating a sandwich when my phone rang. On the other end was a woman who told me that she thought I was hot and wanted to have sex with me. Straight away, my first though was that one of my friends put this girl up to a prank, so I was very skeptical, and I pressed hard to find out who this was. She was reluctant to tell me, but then she finally did:

Her: "I'm April so-and-so from school".
Me: *blank* … "Doesn't ring a bell".
Her: "Really?! You don't know who I am?!"
Me: "Ummm….no. Sorry".
Her: "I don't believe you. You really don't know who I am?!"

She wanted to meet up, to which I reluctantly agreed. After getting off of the phone, I flipped through the previous year's school yearbook to see who she was: Senior, who at the time of this call was then a freshman in college. Not just A cheerleader, but the HEAD cheerleader. Voted most popular in school, most likely to succeed, blah blah blah, ad nauseum.

At that time I was just this "rocker" type who played in bands and was the furthest thing from a Football playing jock type you could possibly imagine. Her world and my world mixed like oil and water.

She insisted that we meet up very discreetly, as if this were some secret exchange where I was slipping military secrets to the Chinese, but it all happened in the end.

From that very moment, for the 30 some odd years that would follow afterwards, I stopped believing you had to be X-Guy to get Y-Girl. I learned there are ALWAYS exceptions. These limiting ideas can always be shattered, but if you adopt these limiting concepts as universally true... they will be.

You will always disqualify yourself from any possible exception to the rule. Forever. Each and every limiting belief takes you out of the running to be proven wrong. Every exception will pass you by. And every time you spout this belief, you are not only giving more strength to this lie in your head, but you are also seeding it into someone else's.

You have to be successful and powerful to get hot women. Lie.
You have to have a rock hard beach body to get hot women. Lie.
You have to be the most popular, the most well known, the most famous... Lie.
You have to drive a hot car to get a hot girl. Lie.
You have to have model good looks of a 10 to get hot women. Lie.

All of these things will certainly help and can certainly elevate things with such women, make it easier, but they are not universal truths. The more of these universal truths you believe in, the more likely they will absolutely be true and the more likely you will be absolutely convinced of them... alone... at home... pissed off at the world and the women in it.

great post. Always one of the sharpest guys here

 

[jaymbrs]

A lot of it has to do with how much interaction you have with females on a daily basis. That happened a lot in high school, college and the part time server jobs I had. So in turn I got laid a lot. Now at 31, I work for a financial firm with mostly men in my department and my sex life has diminished. Point is you have to find ways to be around women.

 

[bigdave17]

A lot of it has to do with how much interaction you have with females on a daily basis. That happened a lot in high school, college and the part time server jobs I had. So in turn I got laid a lot. Now at 31, I work for a financial firm with mostly men in my department and my sex life has diminished. Point is you have to find ways to be around women.

exactly my point

you're the best version of yourself you have ever been and you get laid less than ever

this is my point in that female and male dating is not the same. If you're a woman and you're the best version of yourself, you can go anywhere and have a million ****s offered to you.

If you're the best version of yourself as a male, you still have to have a way to naturally meet women in your daily routine. You can't just go somewhere and have women swarm over you because you're attractive and successful, like women do in the vice versa.

 

[drakeisfire]

are you drunk or high?

You're in classes all the time with hot girls and super easy introductions. You go to parties all the time where you can easily meet hot girls

If you think picking up a girl that you go to class with everyday is harder than randomly cold approaching a stranger at a mall, you were dropped on your head as a child over and over again.

Let's be honest here, if you were a decent looking dude, in good shape, had some friends - you were automatically part of the "cool crowd". It's not like the opposite of that works in your late 20s. Between looks/money/social circle/lifestyle, I'm in the top 0.01% of men my age - I still get zero interest from hotties.

Those girls you are in classes with and meet at parties are not interested in you, they are interested in the football player and frat bros. I am not sure where you went to high school or college but decent looks were not enough to get into the cool crowd, you had to know the RIGHT people and make them like you. In fact you could be ugly but if you were in the right frats, you were cool.

Yes, picking up that girl in class is hard. There are social reprucussions if she hooks up with someone who is not a part of her crew, she has to see her friends and everyone over and over again who will give her a tough time for it. Why else do you think so many rape accusaitons happen in college?

No one was dropped on their head as a child but you. Its obvious from your writings why you are struggling and get absolutely zero action in the real world. I am not even buying you saying you are top 1% of anything, I doubt it. I doubt anyone could even fathom to talk to you for more than a minute in the real world.

You seem like the guy who is a drag to have around at parties so people avoid him and go off, that is if you even get invited to those. Stop flooding this forum with your toxic thoughts and go get a hobby loser.

 

[devilkingx2]

It's easier when you have literally 4 years to talk to a girl like in high school or several months at a time in college.

Selling yourself to a girl over any period of time is easy, the hard part is going fast enough. Cold approaching is hard because you essentially have 1 interaction to seduce her, good luck with that if you aren't a chad.

It's also easier when people know you if you have a good rep, but it's harder when no one knows you. The worst of all is if you have a bad rep. So if you did well in HS then it's easier because it compounds upon itself.

 

[drakeisfire]

It's easier when you have literally 4 years to talk to a girl like in high school or several months at a time in college.

Selling yourself to a girl over any period of time is easy, the hard part is going fast enough. Cold approaching is hard because you essentially have 1 interaction to seduce her, good luck with that if you aren't a chad.

It's also easier when people know you if you have a good rep, but it's harder when no one knows you. The worst of all is if you have a bad rep. So if you did well in HS then it's easier because it compounds upon itself.

Except you had to fit in hardcore in high school and if you didn't fit into a stereotype, life sucked. Things like what you had to say or your life goals meant squat, you had to be on a sports team or look for emotional social circle drama to get hot girls. I don't get how people say it is easy when reputation and social status literally meant everything and it was really based off of how rich your parents were, how good of a school you went to and if you were a part of the in crowd which is not easy to do at all.

 

[devilkingx2]

Except you had to fit in hardcore in high school and if you didn't fit into a stereotype, life sucked. Things like what you had to say or your life goals meant squat, you had to be on a sports team or look for emotional social circle drama to get hot girls. I don't get how people say it is easy when reputation and social status literally meant everything and it was really based off of how rich your parents were, how good of a school you went to and if you were a part of the in crowd which is not easy to do at all.

At my school the most popular guys were mostly just charismatic people. All you had to be was friendly and likeable enough to create/lead a group. Two of the most popular guys were asian nerds who got straight A's. The most stereotypically jock-like people were actually pretty nice guys, just handle the banter.

 

[Who Dares Win]

Thanks no Im done with those popularity contest, even now Im more than glad to drop a girl if staying with her requires me anything close to those dinamics.

I'm no politician, no singer or surely no dancing queen I have better ways to use my energy than follow rules to fit in a certain environment.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

are you drunk or high?

You're in classes all the time with hot girls and super easy introductions. You go to parties all the time where you can easily meet hot girls

If you think picking up a girl that you go to class with everyday is harder than randomly cold approaching a stranger at a mall, you were dropped on your head as a child over and over again.

Let's be honest here, if you were a decent looking dude, in good shape, had some friends - you were automatically part of the "cool crowd". It's not like the opposite of that works in your late 20s. Between looks/money/social circle/lifestyle, I'm in the top 0.01% of men my age - I still get zero interest from hotties.

Invisible due to incel status. Many groups think a guy dying to be in a relationship is creepy. Something must be wrong.

 

[The_411]

High school can be rough, but college is easy as long as you socialize and aren’t a complete nutter.

It’s a question of access 18-22 year old women who have freedom and are at their physical peak. They haven’t been weighed down by children or become embittered with men.

 

[devilkingx2]

I'd say the main benefit of college/high school is that it's basically impossible to be seen as a creep unless you're actually a creep or the girl is a nutjob.

Since she already knows you're just a student like her and it's already ingrained that you're supposed to meet people and that not doing so is weird rather than the other way around

 

[Dr.Suave]

It was harder if you were fugly overweight AFC blue pill Mr. nice guy Friendzone AFC average beta Joe.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Invisible due to incel status. Many groups think a guy dying to be in a relationship is creepy. Something must be wrong.

Im not saying anything is wrong with a man being or wanting a relationship.

The truth of 2018 though is that socially you cannot express that belief as a male. It gets looked at if something is wrong with you.

Create opportunities for sex to happen. Get her hooked on your sex. Ensure she invests heavily into you. Ensure you are a priority with low to no games drama or bs. Then you can worry about possible relationship.

 

[sangheilios]

It's easier because you are literally surrounded by dozens, hundreds or even thousands of different young women in their prime years who are also single. You have easy social access to meeting women in very natural and non awkward settings. Also, as has already been mentioned earlier, you are able to get to know women over a course of time and "sell yourself" to them. If you are genuinely a cool and nice guy, most women would probably give you a chance. Cold approaching women is far more difficult, unless you have an insanely amazing personality or she is very attracted to you a woman most likely isn't going to go out with a random dude she talked to for 5 minutes.

I didn't go to college in the traditional sense and I know I missed out immensely. It is so hard to find a woman I'd be interested in, I'm just never in any situations to meet them.

 

[curtsilv]

are you drunk or high?

You're in classes all the time with hot girls and super easy introductions. You go to parties all the time where you can easily meet hot girls

If you think picking up a girl that you go to class with everyday is harder than randomly cold approaching a stranger at a mall, you were dropped on your head as a child over and over again.

Let's be honest here, if you were a decent looking dude, in good shape, had some friends - you were automatically part of the "cool crowd". It's not like the opposite of that works in your late 20s. Between looks/money/social circle/lifestyle, I'm in the top 0.01% of men my age - I still get zero interest from hotties.

You say you are armenian? Middle eastern men struggle with dating. They have a "rapey" image among most women. And it's not far off, they do tend to act kinda rapey around women. They get physical way too early, and ignore any and all signs of disinterest. The older these guys get, the more oblivious they are. If everything else is as you say, race/ethnicity is probably a big factor.

Also, you seem ignorant about college life. Did you go to college in the US? Large universities tend to have very large classes, so you might as well be cold approaching. Also, you can't just attend a party at your college just because you attend that college. You have to be invited. And frats and sororities almost always control the parties with the hottest women. Do you realize any of this?

Add to that, most students aren't just partying 24/7. They have classes and jobs and have to study and have relatively little free time.

 

[drakeisfire]

I'd say the main benefit of college/high school is that it's basically impossible to be seen as a creep unless you're actually a creep or the girl is a nutjob.

Since she already knows you're just a student like her and it's already ingrained that you're supposed to meet people and that not doing so is weird rather than the other way around

I am not sure what kind of college you went to but it was very easy to be seen as a creep and is even today, the campus rape hysteria is definitely coming from somewhere for sure. I found that most of the times, the guys getting the hottest girls were athletes and frat boys. Meeting people can be somewhat easy but even then, tight cliques form and it is a cut throat social environment at most schools.

Not in the right frat? GTFO.

I think you are overinflating college and underinflating the real world, most of the times it was top tier frat guys with massive social circles and cool athletes that got girls. Everyone else was starving if they did not have a social circle.

 

[drakeisfire]

High school can be rough, but college is easy as long as you socialize and aren’t a complete nutter.

It’s a question of access 18-22 year old women who have freedom and are at their physical peak. They haven’t been weighed down by children or become embittered with men.

No, they are too focused on who is the most socially well connected, in the best fraternities, playing the top notch sport and was the talk of town among her gossippy friends.

 

[devilkingx2]

I am not sure what kind of college you went to but it was very easy to be seen as a creep and is even today, the campus rape hysteria is definitely coming from somewhere for sure. I found that most of the times, the guys getting the hottest girls were athletes and frat boys. Meeting people can be somewhat easy but even then, tight cliques form and it is a cut throat social environment at most schools.

I'm in college right now. It's not a huge party college, most people don't dorm and frats aren't everything, but there are several frats and sororities on campus and many more women than men in general.

I don't really see the problems that you're talking about, but then again I've calibrated my approaches enough to not be seen as creepy, perhaps you need to work on that? Idk.

I think you are overinflating college and underinflating the real world, most of the times it was top tier frat guys with massive social circles and cool athletes that got girls. Everyone else was starving if they did not have a social circle

I barely see anyone putting in effort to meet people in most of my classes and on campus tbh. Perhaps people are starving because they choose not to hunt?